BAD BEHAVIOUR AFTER VISITATION

Samantha - posted on 04/17/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I've been separated since Sept 2006. My daughter is 4 years old, and everytime she has seen her father (which is under supervision) she is in an extremely bad mood, cheeky, and cries for no apparent reason. Is this normal behaviour? What is causing it? When she doest see her father for a long period of time, I have absolutely no problems. after she has seen him she is a nightmare, and I feel like running away.

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Tiffany - posted on 04/17/2009

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My daughter is 11 months old and her dad and I separated when she was 3 weeks old. He didn't see her until she was 4 months old, then again at 6 months old. It was only for an hour, supervised at that by my Dad which is who we live with. She was very clingy to me after the visitation and very needy for a day or two after that. I'm wondering if they are sensing our anxiety from the visitation process, or if it just takes a lot out of them being around someone they don't really know. It is all new to them each and every single time they have to go, and I think it does take a toll on them trying to process all of it.

My ex had another daughter and I had many conversations with her mother that was in the same boat as you. I worked with her and tried to make our house and rules as much like her mother's as possible to try to help her out. My ex on the other hand didn't cooperate.

You could try talking to her about it ask her if she has any questions, etc. Maybe opening some lines of communication could help.

Lisa - posted on 04/17/2009

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my daughter is 16 months old and she does the same thing. me & her father seperated when she was 11 months. now everytime he visits and then he leaves she gets crabby. she acts like that for 2 days. crying for no reason and throwing tantrums. then she goes back to normal after the 2nd day. i guess she understands the situation. even though shes young but theres nothing she can do aboutit. except be a pain in the butt, lol. im already use to it though. i just dont pay attention to her when she acts like that. dont know if it will ever change. its not too bad though. hey there kids. what can u do....

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