Do you think it is right for your husband to tell you that you cannot talk to your guy friends (who you knew way before him)? I am dealing with this issue now and need some opinions! Help! Thanks

Dawn - posted on 03/25/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Ok Ladies here it goes... I have been married for 10 years now and my husband and I have had a rocky time. I have 3 children with him all under the ages of 10. Lately I have been talking to some of my friends I knew years before him (like high school, childhood friends and such). He is now mad at me and making comments to me because I am talking to these people again..by talking to I mean like instant messaging..not even on the phone. Most of these people I talk to are married with kids or are in relationships, and I am just talking to them about the past. My husband is 47 and I am 32 and we disagree on this matter. I am getting tired of him making comments and remarks and always telling me not to talk to these people.... Do you think he has the right to tell me this? Am I wrong for having friends? oh...He is Even Like this with FEMALE friends as well. Thanks Everyone for any help!

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Amber - posted on 03/26/2009

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Hunny you need to get out of that. You can't change him and he will never change for you, he can say he will but he has to change for himself and only himself. There is no reason for him to control you. Don't waste your time on anyone who isn't willing to waste there time on you.  Be who you are not who he wants you to be, you will become very unhappy with yourself and your life. Get outta there. It isn't worth the pain it could cause you in the end. More importantly never think of your self as foolish I don't know one person who doesn't or hasn't wished someone would change so things could be better. I still wish my ex would love me enough to change. If you wanna see how much he is willing is to change. Go stay somewhere else and AFTER you get somewhere else.Tell him you can't be with him if thats the way he is gonna be and ask him to go to therapy for whatever you think he needs help with. Also try couples therapy on the side of the rest. If he say's yes to all that don't give in make sure he finishes everything before you take yourself and your kids back to him. That is a form of abuse and you shouldn't let anyone treat you that way. I hope this helps. Good luck

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i have been there my ex took it to the next stage which included puttin me in hospital with broken ribs and losin his baby we had 3 kids and he hit me in front of them just be careful i got out and doin good now can talk to anyone i like now that was all over talkin to a friend who i knew form when we were babies cause our mums were friends

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Jennifer - posted on 03/26/2009

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I went through this with my ex. It was ok for him but not me. At that time I gave up my friends. But quess who were loyal to me now and back then? Not my ex!!!

Dawn - posted on 03/25/2009

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Quoting Dawn:

Do you think it is right for your husband to tell you that you cannot talk to your guy friends (who you knew way before him)? I am dealing with this issue now and need some opinions! Help! Thanks

Ok Ladies here it goes... I have been married for 10 years now and my husband and I have had a rocky time. I have 3 children with him all under the ages of 10. Lately I have been talking to some of my friends I knew years before him (like high school, childhood friends and such). He is now mad at me and making comments to me because I am talking to these people again..by talking to I mean like instant messaging..not even on the phone. Most of these people I talk to are married with kids or are in relationships, and I am just talking to them about the past. My husband is 47 and I am 32 and we disagree on this matter. I am getting tired of him making comments and remarks and always telling me not to talk to these people.... Do you think he has the right to tell me this? Am I wrong for having friends? oh...He is Even Like this with FEMALE friends as well. Thanks Everyone for any help! *****I had to add this...he is already controlling..I cant even work at a job.  We have been seperated because of this before, but he promises to change..and he still has not. Is there any hope? or am I the foolish one for wasting my life with him? Thanks!


 

Nikki - posted on 03/25/2009

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I'm in the same type a situation but I don't let it bother me because who are those people to me anyway and how important are they to put a strain on my relationship. They are not important to me. It may not be right but I have children, hubby, and bills to worry about. There is usually a reason why people in your past!

Katelyn - posted on 03/25/2009

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well let me put it this way short and sweet... i am getting a divorce becasue of this issue. you shoudl work it out before you disagree so much that you feel like he is controlling you and you will end up without a husband

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