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Getting over Dad

Jen - posted on 03/10/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hello
I have a 5 month old son who is truly a blessing. He's the best thing that ever happened to me. Yet, his father is a different story. We live on different sides of the state because while I was pregnant I chose to be closer to my family. The father is on "house arrest" or so he says so he cannot even visit. We talk on the phone several times a day, although sometimes he ignores my calls n texts. The part that gets me is that he asks me for money. I have a good job but as a single mom I am struggling. I just want to know how to get over him. He hasn't seen our son for 5 months. I have trust issues from previous relationships but I just don't believe that he is on house arrest, or anything else that comes out if his mouth for that matter. I just want to be able to get over him without ruining the relationship for my son. Am I crazy? I could be. But I've always been the type that trusts their instincts. I've gone it alone for 5 months already. I know I can do it. I just want to know if I'm doing the right thing.

2 Comments

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Poloist12 - posted on 03/25/2014

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No not at all! And this is coming from a man.

Just start limiting the conversation to your son. Be cool about it when you speak, see the patterns and how you get caught up, and you can break the cycle without disrupting the relationship.

Sandra - posted on 03/11/2014

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Sounds like you are making the right decisions for you at the moment! I believe that individuals come into our life for a reason, and your beautiful son, is the reason that this man came into yours. It doesn't sound like you are trying to keep him from his son, so you are obviously not doing anything wrong. He however, has a whole lot of nerve asking you for money!!! Yes you are a single mom and you choose to support his child, not him. Perhaps he needs to grow up and realize, there are no free rides, he has to make his way in the world, not just to ease the burden for you, but to make his son proud to call him his father. I hope that you are able to make the right choice for your family and perhaps you need to really think about what you want in a relationship. When a man respects who you are as a person, I would think that he would be doing something to help you not take from you. Perhaps your "trust issues" are not truly trust issues, but merely your intuition trying to give you a signal that he is not the one to trust!!! You obviously have a good heart when you start this conversation talking about the "blessing" in your life. Your other blessing is your intuition telling you something is not quite right. When someone shows you who they are...believe them. So while he has time apart from you, perhaps he can show you what you truly mean to him, but by asking for money I am afraid he is not off to a good start. Trust in yourself, because you are the only one that can answer this question. I wish you all the best and hope that your family grows and thrives in the love you have for each other!!!
Good Luck
Sandra www.abovethetrees.ca

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