I am recently seperated 7 months now and my son who has been toilet trained since he is 2 is having frequent daily accidents and it is driving me nuts what do I do and why is he doing this ????

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If you can definitely rule out something medical, examine you mental environment. Does your son overhear you talking about the separation or does he witness you being stressed out and upset? I know that it is SO difficult (been there, done that) but it seems like he may be feeling the affects. This definitely sounds like a stress reaction. Try not to show him that it makes you crazy! Be supportive and try to talk to him and ask him (calmly) if he is feeling alright. (then go in the next room and scream silently - haha) Just make sure you are always aware to try and keep your separation between you and his father. (I'm not assuming you are allowing him to witness it, but maybe he is picking up on something). Maybe that will help.

Jenn - posted on 04/22/2009

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what you can do is get those new pull ups that let him feel when he has an accident. the feel of it should be enough to discourage him. before you start the pull ups, talk to him. sit him down and ask him whats wrong. it might be that he thinks whats happening is his fault and that if he were a baby again, it would bring you and your significant other back together. it could be that he is mad about something you said to your ex or what your ex said to you. just let him know that it wasnt his fault. then explain to him, if you are comfortable, what happened and that maybe he will be able to see his dad.

Laura - posted on 04/21/2009

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Crystal,
Your not alone. I thought I'd never get my son potty trained. And when It finally happened, so did the seperation of his Father and I. He is now 7 years old and believe it or not, once in a while he has what he used to call an 'accident'. Now he admitts he dose it because he is angry. We talk about it, I use logic as best I can. My question to you is this. Could there be something that is bothering him you are not aware of?Keep in mind our children want to please us. So they often don't mention emotions that are negitive. I thought my son was handeling the seperation like a champ. It took months before he told me what was really going on. for him, it was an attention getter. He knows he won't bring Daddy home. But children express them selves in many ways. I hope this may be of some help to you. I wish you much luck.
Laura Staff

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