My 2 1/2 year old calls me "Shelly." Please Help!!

Shelly - posted on 04/26/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

24

15

4

Alright, well my real name is Michele but everyone calls me "Shelly". My boyfriend thought it would be funny if he taught her to call me Shelly. Well, it's defintely not funny. She doesn't even bother calling me Mommy, Momma, Ma anymore whatsoever. This has been going on for 3+ months and it's really bothering me now. She refuses to call me Momma. It's killing me inside. And it's also really embarassing in public because she talks loud. I don't know what to do or try. I've tried repeatly calling her out on it and saying "I'm not Shelly, I'm Momma." But she doesn't listen. This has been making me feel like crap to be honest and I can't take this anymore. Also, another thing is she's having all out tantrums; stopping feet, screaming, crying, throwing toys at me, kicking, and she's even hitting herself and me. Please help!!!

6 Comments

View replies by

Anna - posted on 04/27/2009

2

15

0

i totally agree with cece about ur boyfriend, my ex is terrible at teaching our 3 year old rude ryhmes etc, and incouraging bad behaviour, which i have pulled him up on lots of times, but this weekend was the last straw for me, i cant remember wot he said, but our son starts school this september and i lost my temper with his dad, and told him to grow up and act his age, as i am the one who will get called to school if our son says anything rude to other kids or even worse teachers, and i told him that i wud give them his number and he'd have to leave his work and drive 40 miles to his school and explain to the teachers where he picked it up from, that soon stopped that

Cece - posted on 04/27/2009

22

32

6

Im so sorry for your predicament.To start with how old is your boyfriend?Can he just grow up and help you deal with the child.Kids are very delicate and everything they see or hear around them affects them.That was a very wrong move for him to teach your child to call you by your name.He should now act up and explain to the innocent girl that it is wrong to call mommy that and the both of you try and explain firmly that it is wrong to hit mommy and crying wunt gain her anything.Im sure she will finally understand.My daughters father tried that and i Immediately put a stop to it.good luck.

Anna - posted on 04/26/2009

2

15

0

hiya, it is a phase my sisters lil boy went through the same thing and it broke her heart, so when my eldest did it i knew it was a phase, and its about learning how to talk to people and interact with others, the advise about not responding is sound as thats wot me and my sister did and it worked, good luck x

Shana - posted on 04/26/2009

13

0

6

My 4 year old calls me by my first name when talking to others...

He would call me by my first name, and it unnerved me, but a counsler told me that he is starting to realize that you are a person other than his mother.

ya know wife mother co worker. Look at it as a positive, If it embarrases you in public, just gently remind her tht you are mom--- or whatever you like to be called.





AS FOR THE TANTRUMS, I DON'T LET HIM HIT ME. DON'T GET ME WRONG, HE WILL TRY---BUT I LET HIM KNOW THAT IT'S NOT RIGHT, I WILL HOLD HIS ARMS, OR IF IT IS A FULL OUT FIT, HOLD HER.... MAYBE I SHOULD SAY RESTRAIN HER, LET HER GET IT ALL OUT WITHOUT HARMING YOU OR HERSELF, THEN ASK HER WHY SHE IS SO ANGRY, HOW DO YOU THINK IT MAKES MOMMY FEEL WHEN YOU HIT ME.....TAP HER ON THE ARM WITH JUST ENOUGH FORCE TO LET HER KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT PLAYING, AND ASK HER HOW THAT MADE HER FEEL?



AS YOU CAN SEE I AM INTO FEELINGS, IF SHE IS TOO YOUNG TO REALLY EXPRESS HERSELF---- HAVE HER DRAW OR SHOW YOU BY POINTING TO A PIX IN A BOOK OR MAG----



WE MADE A FEELINGS BOOK I TOOK POLOROIDS, OF HAPPY FACE, SAD FACE, SCARED FACE, MAD FACE, SILLY FACE---- AND SO ON. SOMEONE LAMINATED IT AND I PUT A BINDER RING IN IT--- WHEN HE WAS YOUNGER I WOULD TELL HIM THAT MOMMY FELT SAD, THEN I WOULD POINT TO THE SAD PIX IN HIS FEELINGS BOOK... BLAH BLAH BLAH, AM I TALKING TOO MUCH?

Laura - posted on 04/26/2009

33

24

6

my daughter had a spell a few months back where she called me Laura instead of mummy. I learnt not to reply or to pretend I didnt hear her. Hwne she learnt she wasn't get a response, she would then say "mummy" and I would then speak to her and respond. She learnt then that I only answered to mummy or mum.



She is also known for her firey tantrums. She would usually scream and stamp her feet, then she started hitting furniture and then it was me (rarely me now) so I started to give her a time out. I would ask to stop being silly. Then I would tell her that I was counting to 3 and if she didnt stop then she would go to bed (her timeout). If I got to 3 then I would take her to her room and put her on the bed and leave her for 2 minutes (1 minute by year of their age) and when I returned, I would ask her to apologise explaining what she is apologising for and then she could come back out and play - (nowadays if she goes up, she apologises the minute she hears me and I ask her why she was saying sorry and she tells me then what she did wrong). If she wouldnt then I would tell her that she would have to stay where she is until she is ready to say sorry. (only done that once).



Hope that helps

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms