shower bounderies

Kathleendoran - posted on 02/09/2016 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My little girl came home from visiting her dad one weekend and described how she had taken a shower with his girlfriend and seen different body parts. I was extremely upset at the thought of someone thinking it was at all appropriate to shower with my little girl. I really feel like she violated my child.

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Raye - posted on 02/12/2016

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If they were just taking a shower together and there was no inappropriate touching, then I'm not sure it's a big deal. My husband sometimes jumps in the shower with his son, and his son and daughter used to shower together when they were younger (sometimes with mom or dad's help). My husband is often in the bathroom when either kid is showering, because they want him to play guitar, and he also wants to make sure they are properly washing. While my step-kids have not seen me naked, they've seen me in a two piece bathing suit, and in my bra as I quickly changed shirts. There's nothing wrong with nakedness unless there's some sexual component to it. If you haven't talked to your child about appropriate and inappropriate touching, then now might be the time (to put your mind at ease).

Children should know what the parts of their body are, what the differences are between boys and girls, and knowing how bodies change over time. They are probably going to see other naked people in gym locker rooms, pool locker rooms, etc. and they should not be embarrassed about it. They should not be embarrassed about themselves and their bodies either. Let the child know, if she ever has questions about what she's seen, she can always talk to you.

If it really bothers you, then you can calmly mention to the father that you're really uncomfortable with them showering together, and you respectfully ask that he doesn't let it continue.

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