What can I do for my daughter? Depression...

Maree - posted on 06/21/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )




My daughter is only 23 yrs old and is suffering from depression. She has been on 2 kinds of tablets but went from one extreme to the other. The first was Zoloft and that was just rediculous. It kept her awake at night, and during the day all she did was smile and laugh at everything. She changed the meds and now is worse than ever but she said she was only on 1/2 a tab per day and has to slowly increase to 1 per day. She has 2 young children one almost 5 and the other just turned 1 so it is imperative that she is on the toes most of the day. I try to do what I can in the way of babysitting and taking her shopping but it is not helping that much. any advise would be most greatfull.


Clare-maree - posted on 06/30/2009




I have a lot in common with your daughter, I am 23 and have 2 small children, I also have depression and symptoms of Bipolar!! Where to start.... I can totally relate to being really high and really low on and off medication as Marji says above and I agree that with risks included medication is probably the best solution along with lifestyle changes eg exercise and dieting. There have been times where I'm so happy that I feel invincible and I sing and dance around the house and no matter what happens I don't get angry, upset etc and then it can be as little as an hour later where I'm picking out a tree/post to run my car into on the way to pick the kids up from daycare. Your head can be a very scary place sometimes and there are times where I feel like such a fruitloop I have to get out of the house and take the kids for a walk in the pram to try to distract myself. I've been on a few different medications and they all have their side effects and affect people differently. Some medications just don't work at all and then there's also finding the right dose as well. I was on Lexapro for a year and it seems to help keep me from the suicidal thoughts but at the same time made me feel like I wasn't experiencing my emotions fully. I have recently come off that medication because we are trying for another baby and it wasn't until I had fully weaned myself from the drug that I realised how much it affected me. There's been times where I know my feelings to a particular situation arn't appropriate where I get so angry or so sad I feel like I'm going to explode and I have to put myself in a time out until I can think rationally again. I've lost count of how many times my partner has wrestled knives out of my hands or bashed doors down to get to me when I've been hurting myself.

One thing that has helped get me through it all is:




Your daughter will probably benefit from talking to others in her situation as I know it helps me. It can be very difficult to live with but I believe finding the right medication is the best place to start. Keep her motivated and keep reminding her of all the beautiful things she has in her life to keep her going. I hope this helps a little and best of luck!!

[deleted account]

Hi Maree, Look at nutrition. There are no side affects with nutrition. A study was done where they tested spinach and found that it takes 43 bowls of "today's" spinach to supply enough needed nutrients human body requires to function properly. Opposed to 1 back in 1953! Do your research. Dr. John Gray author Men are from Mars and Woman are from Venus, the famous relationship expert. He says he "loves Isagenix because it makes people happy!!!!" That's because it supplies our bodies with critical nutrients it needs to function properly. I am a health coach and will offer my coaching free. It is my pleasure and my passion to help you live your best and healthiest life!

Vicki - posted on 06/21/2009





You can provide support and encouragement in a number of ways.

■Listen. Let your family member or friend know that you want to understand how he or she feels and that you're willing to listen. Because of the depression, your loved one may not have the energy or inclination to discuss his or her symptoms. So when he or she is interested in talking, listen carefully but avoid giving advice or opinions — responses that may discourage further conversation. Never disparage feelings your friend or family member expresses.

■Give positive reinforcement. Depression can make people feel worthless. They may judge themselves harshly and find fault with everything about themselves, from their appearance to their job performance to their thoughts and feelings. You can remind your loved one about his or her positive qualities and how much he or she means to you and others.

■Encourage consistent disease management. If your friend or family member is in treatment for depression, help him or her remember to take prescribed medications and to attend therapy appointments.

■Help create a low-stress environment. A regular routine and an organized environment can minimize stress and help a person with depression feel more in control. You can help a family member or friend make a schedule for meals, medication, exercise, sleep and household chores. You might also help create a system to organize things that can easily become cluttered or chaotic, such as bills, laundry, homework or work files.

■Offer help. Your friend or family member may not be able to take care of certain tasks very well. Give suggestions about specific tasks you would be willing to do, such as balancing a checkbook, making a grocery list or mowing the lawn. Or ask if there is a particular task that you could take on.

■Make plans together. Depression steals away motivation, energy and interest. Ask your loved one to join you on a walk, see a movie with you, or work with you on a hobby or other activity he or she previously enjoyed. Don't try to force him or her into doing something.


View replies by

Marji - posted on 06/24/2009




I suffer from Bipolar disorder and being a single parent it is sometimes very difficult to deal with. The constant mood swings are difficult for my kids to deal with because they don't know what to expect from one day to the next and sometimes one hour to the next. I am on medication that helps some but it is a daily battle. When I suffer from the depression side of bipolar disorder, I have to make myself take my medication and I have to change my diet as well as my activity level. I have to force myself to get out of the house and do things. The more I do the better I feel and the shorter the depression side of my bipolar lasts. Depression can be broken with a change in diet, the right medication, counseling, and activity. One of the big ones is activity and exercise. I will be the last one to tell you to have your daughter ween herself off prescribed medication by a professional that is rediculous as long as she takes it like she is supposed to and she sees her doctor when she is supposed to the benefits always outweigh the risks. I will say that she has to be 100% honest with her doctor about what she is feeling and what her symptoms are. I wasn't for a long time so only part of my disease was being treated and the other part was being ignored. She may need to be on more than one medication. One to treat the depression and one to treat mania, from what you have said. I am not a doctor just someone that has dealt with bipolar for 16 years now (treated) and longer untreated.

In short, take her meds on schedule, do some research to find out what kinds of food will help and eat right, get exercise everyday and get out of the house as much as possible. Depression isn't something you can convince yourself to get rid of it is an imbalance of the chemicals in your brain and sometime diet and exercise will balance them out again and then some need medication to balance them out. It is a tedious process with medication. You have to find the right one then the right dose and it takes time to get yourself back on track but the things that I suggested should help. I know they help me when I swing down into my depression side of the bipolar. I hope this helps and good luck to you and your daughter.

Sandra - posted on 06/23/2009




Having worked for a Consultant Psychiatrist for 2 years I would strongly advise your daughter to get off those anti-depressants as soon as she possibly can. Stop feeling sorry for herself, pick herself up and get on with her life and raise her 2 children. One of the highest rate of suicides is people who are on anti-dpressants as soon as they stop tehem they become suicidal and are on an all time low.

She really needs to wean hereself off them and make new friends and start to go out again. Remind her every day that she is very lucky and blessed with 2 young healthy children. Tell her to go UCH and see what people who are suffering from cancer are going through and ask her to count her many blessings. People sit around too long moaning about what they do not have instead of being grateful for what they already have.

Tell her to pick herself up, not to let herself go and she will meeting someone new if she is single and start her life over again. She needs to be more positive, take a break when she can and not surround herself with friends who make her feel miserable. Positive thinking is vital when raising children. As they get older it will become easier. My ex-partner abandoned me when I was pregnant. I carried on with life. Learn the lesson and move on. I have a handsome 6 year old son whom I am so proud of. Positive thinking is the key.

Hope this helps.


Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms