Anyone feel like a loser when you constantly hear form people well why dont you get a job?

Mary - posted on 10/31/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Im a stay at home mom and I always feel like a loser when the topic of people working comes up...My husband is fine with him just working and me staying home, and we come up with excuses: Only got one car, Dont have a babysitter,Cant pay a babysitter, My health is an obstical so i cant work...All these are my reason for staying home,I also stay home cuz i do not trust neone else to watch my kid..I know some moms get depressed stayin at home but when i work i become depressed, I cry at work for no reason or have lots of panic attack, I cant concentrate and no matter where ive worked i just dont work fast enough for the company,not mention im a slow learner..Basically does anyone else hear ever feel quilty for not working and choosing to be a homemaker wat ever the reason?

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Denikka - posted on 11/30/2011

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Why should you make excuses? Why is it any of their business. You DO work.
You're a laundress, a maid, a childcare provider, a cook, etc etc etc. So you don't have a 9-5 job. Hardly anyone does anymore. So you don't get paid cash, you SAVE enough money by doing all those things to probably pay their salaries twice over.

I understand where you're coming from. I'm also a stay at home mom and, especially since money's been tight, I've been feeling guilty about not bringing in some money. But I know that raising my children is more important than being able to buy a ton of shiny flashy toys at Christmas that they'll play with once :P
Be comfortable in what you're doing :) You're doing what you feel is best for your family. That's what's important :)

Erin - posted on 11/30/2011

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I feel guilty sometimes because money gets tight a lot. I do work from home but it is not a constant thing and not always guaranteed that i will have work every week. I have thought about going back full time but the money i would make would barely cover the cost of childcare. I would rather not have the money and be the one taking care of my kids. I love being home with my little men. I want to be home and raise my kids. Maybe when the start school I will go back to work. I don't know. My mother was very involved with our lives even once we were older. She volunteered at school. I want I want to be there every step of the way. I can see a mother having to work ( single mom or really can't make it with one income). My husband would rather me be home with the kids. Maybe when the topic comes up on why you don't work just say " I chose to have a family I want to be the one who raises my kids" or (kind of rude but gets the point across) "Why have kids if you are not going to raise them?" I am not against women working and I am not trying to judge women that do. I just think if you have the option why not stay with your kids?

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Brittany - posted on 12/20/2011

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I dont feel guilty for being a stay at home mother. It isnt anyone elses business what you do. Your job is to do what is best for your child, and staying home is always the best thing. My husbands uncle actually told me once that I needed to strap my baby to my back and go to work...this coming from a man who sues everyone he can for no reason and doesnt work..hes lucky I was in a good mood that day or he would have gotten a smack in the face, lol. Dont ever feel guilty for choosing to stay home with your child rather than bring home a paycheck..what is more important?

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