Am i being selfish about this situation?

Rhonda - posted on 01/24/2012 ( 11 moms have responded )

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My husband wants to go on vacation, but wants our son to go with us, andleave ourbaby at home with my mom. I am a stay at home mom so i am always around the kids. and if i go on vacation i kinda want it to be at least once by ourself, no kids. My husband does not understand. Do i sound really selfish bout this? Any suggestions. Or should i not bring it up?

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Rhonda - posted on 01/24/2012

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He wants to take him cuz he will remember it. He is 5 years old. Our baby is 8 months old and he says she wont remember it cuz shes little.

[deleted account]

No, you don't sound selfish! Why does he want to take one and leave the other? I would say take both, or leave both (but taking both would not be much of a vacation for you, would it?).



My husband and I rarely take extended vacations without our son, but we often take weekend trips away from our son. Maybe you could compromise by offering to exchange the big family vacation for a small family vacation and a couple of child-free weekend getaways.

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Sal - posted on 01/27/2012

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no not selfish.....i often tell my hubby id rather a weekend without the kids rather than week away with them.....

Sal - posted on 01/27/2012

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no not selfish.....i often tell my hubby id rather a weekend without the kids rather than week away with them.....

Jennifer - posted on 01/27/2012

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And I get the take one leave one. When we went to Disney, we only took the older one so we could concentrate on her...no nap times for babies. Nothing wrong with leaving the baby.....so you can have time with your older one :)

Jennifer - posted on 01/27/2012

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Girl. I feel you on that. There is not a chance in hell that you are being selfish! YOU DESERVE your time with your husband without kids. If you have not brought it up yet...chances are he has no clue you feel this way. Clueless=Men when it comes to what is on their wives minds unless we spell it out....very very clearly with small words lol I am joking. Respect for all husbands. xoxo Good Luck!

Charity - posted on 01/27/2012

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I don't think you sound selfish, and your hubby will probably never understand your side of it. But maybe you guys can make a compromise so you two can get some time away alone so you can get a bit of sanity. Then do the time where he can get time with kids which he probably doesn't get as much. Good luck!

Shellie - posted on 01/26/2012

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I don't think your selfish or you shouldn't feel guilty about taking that time away to recharge. I am a stepmom to four small kids that live with me and their father full time. And I have my own 11 mo old . The children have no visitation with mother so we never get a break only he does when he goes to work. I would give anything to have that time away so enjoy yourself and plan a family outing a different weekend.

Jesse - posted on 01/26/2012

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I don't think you are selfish but you should look at it from his point of view also, he doesn't get to stay home and spend all day with them! It really depends on what sort of holiday was planned.... obviously there are lots of grown up things that a child can't come along to. maybe you could take kids this time but next time plan for a romantic Holiday for the just the two of you next time or even a sexy weekend away :D

Jackie - posted on 01/24/2012

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I'm with you..I stay home & need a vacation everyday :) You're not being selfish at all. A vacation with a 5 year old is not a vacation. You'll need another vacation when you get home, and definitely won't get the time away that you desperately need to appreciate being home with your kiddos. You need to miss them. Definitely talk to hubby about how you're feeling. This is one way to take care of you & you deserve it mama.

[deleted account]

I see, that does make sense.



We only have one kid. Even though it is not usually a big deal to bring him along, I still love our grown-up getaways. There are a lot of things cannot do with a kid in tow that you may want to try--like scuba diving or Historic tours which may bore him but totally fascinate you.



What about bringing your mom with you? She could watch the kids so you can have some alone time, but you would be able to do the family activities together? We used to bring J's nanny when he was little--when I first heard of families doing this, I thought they were crazy, but the first time we did it, I had the BEST time ever--we all did!

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