Any advice on how to decide if u r done having children?

Kendall - posted on 05/16/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )




Outside the financial aspect of having chlildren, what do u all think of the baby itch, I have 3 children aged almost 8, 2 and a half and 8 months, how do u decide if u r done? Any thoughts? I am so afraid of having the surgery then wanting another child in a couple yrs, what do u all think? My husband is happy either way.


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Louise - posted on 05/17/2010




Do not have anything lasting if you feel like this. You are not done! I would wait about five years before you take the plunge and have anything done that is final. Look at me I have an 18 year old a 16 year old and a 18 month old. I knew I wanted another baby but my husband did not, and it took me 15 years to convince him that he wanted another baby too! My biological clock kicked in big time and there was no way I was going to miss the opportunity of having that last baby. If you are not sure then keep your options open and use contraception until you have made a decision.

Kristin - posted on 05/16/2010




I think you should talk to your doctor about ALL of your birth control options, not just the permanent kind. There are so many options, that you can find one that works for the short to mid term while you decide on the long term.

I would also suggest you really talk with your husband about what size family you both feel is right for you two. I would wait until the youngest is a bit bigger/older. This is a time to lay it all on the table. Your fears and hopes, his fears and hopes. Not just for the kids, but for yourselves as well.

My husband and I decided that we would try for a third after our second turned 18 months and got on it after he was 2. In all of it, we kept in our minds that if it was meant to be, it would happen. If it wasn't, that was okay too. We are a couple of weeks out from our third child's due date now. We also know that we are done and have taken steps to ensure that; vasectomy for him and possible an IUD for me just to be sure. Yes, I'm a little sad that this will be the last round of "firsts." But, I know that I'm ready to move on the next part of what our family can be.

Karie - posted on 05/16/2010




I wasnt sure when i had my second child if i wanted more children or not. When he was a couple of months old all the sudden i realized i had a feeling of contentment.I was ok with just having 2 kids. Even though i will probubly get the baby itch from time to time, the reality of all the trials and responsabilities of a new baby will bring me back to reality.
My husband had a vesectomy, that seemed a better fit for us. Even though i know i dont want to have any more children, as women i think we just dont want the definate feeling of infertility.

Kate - posted on 05/16/2010




You can have your tubes tied, not cut or burned. There's a slight chance one could come untied, but having them cut or burned is so permanent. l think when you are really done having babies, you'll know it. lf l was where you are and weren't positive, l'd not make it a permanent 'fix'.

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