Anyone else feel the pressure to go back to work once the kids are in school?

Amanda - posted on 11/16/2008 ( 4 moms have responded )




People seem to have an expectation that I'll go back to full time work once my kids go to school but I don't want my children in before and after school care and holiday I the only one who feels under pressure to justify my decisions?


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[deleted account]

Yes! Even my husband has made comments about once the children are in school I could get a part time job...... but I've nixed that by replying that I'll be homeschooling and so they won't be gone! I think the top priority is and should be our family (husband and children). Some people want and need to work outside of the home I feel that if I did I couldn't do all the other things that I do by staying home. I bake and cook from scratch (even grind my own flour), I have an enormous garden that I then freeze/can/dehydrate, I look after the livestock and once the orchard is producing there will be that to care for. How could I possibly do all of this and give 100% to my family and a job??? I think each couple has to choose what their priorities are and what they want as an end result and then work towards that. I want my children to ALWAYS have their mother available to them. I want to train/teach and love them without other responsibilities getting in the way. I want to provide wholesome, healthy food. I've chosen to be the old fashioned stay at home momma and I'm content with it. But my mom worked full time and I still KNEW that I was her top priority and everything else could be hung if I needed her. So I think working mommas can do an awesome job too! Once you and your husband have made your choice don't let others tell you what is the right thing to do. We don't need to justify our decisions to anyone, although I've felt like I needed to somedays too. :)

[deleted account]

I have a little while before my daughter starts school, but my husband and I have discussed what we'll do when the time comes. I'm on the same page as you - even once my child starts school, I want to be available when she's not in school ie mornings, afternoons, and holiday breaks. This is a decision that you make with your family. No one else has a say, nor the right to judge you for doing what you feel is best. Honestly, I think many working mothers (not all) are envious of having the option to stay home with their children. There's certainly nothing wrong with wanting to work, but for some of us, we are happy making motherhood our primary responsibility. I felt judgment from my co-workers when I chose not to return to work after I had the baby. I worked with many women who were much more career oriented than me and believed I was giving up my ambitions to be a SAHM. What they didn't realize is that I am much more fulfilled spending my days raising my little girl than I was in the corporate rat race. I will probably find some kind of PT work once she's in school (I'm contemplating PT nursing), but it will have to work around Sophie's schedule. She's my top priority.

[deleted account]

You should never feel the need to justify what works best for you & your family! I felt that mainly from my husbands side of the family, who by the way, all the mom's work full time. Let it go, I started a home based business from home making more than I did working part-time outside of the house & that still isn't good enough. I think sometime's it is a jealousy issue & I can't fix that for anyone. I enjoy working from home around my families needs & schedules, I contribute nicely to the families finances & it works for us so It doesn't matter to me who likes it or not!!! I have the flexibility to volunteer at school & all the things I couldn't do working outside of the home. Do what is best for your family!

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