Anyone else tired of being unappreciated?!

Natasha - posted on 04/30/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I am a SAHM.....AND I have a full time night job too! I do all the dishes, laundry, cleaning, anything he ask for or needs I get it for him. I work a 9 hour shift 5 days a week and then get off go home go to sleep for 3 hours then get up with our child...And he still acts like an ass! He acts like I'm always so mean to him...are you serious?! I have two full time jobs! SAHM and A JOB! So wtf am I missing here? Why do I still feel unappreciated? This just eats away at me I try talking to him about it and I think I get more of a response from a wall! Anyone else out there dealing with this bull shit?!

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Lindsey - posted on 05/03/2012

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I would act more on natural consequences such as:



-if he doesn't put his dirty clothes in the wash, they don't get washed



-if he treats you bad, you go off and make him come to you



-if he doesn't contribute to the housework, then he lives in a pit



Just stop doing everything for him, make him do it himself and realize that it is actual work. I know that you might be anal about the house [I am] but if it helps to prove a point that nothing gets done unless you are the one doing it, than don't do it. Eventually he is going to do something about it. [or maybe just limit it to one area, like the trash]



If he wants you to do everything, maybe you should quit one of your jobs and he can lose things that he appreciates that cost money. He needs to realize that just because you are home does not mean that you aren't working.





Also, I would be very kind. If you come across to him like you did in the post [even though you were obviously upset] than I wouldn't want to help or be nice to you either. Just think about your temperament. Maybe that will inspire him to be kind back to you and make him want to do nice things for you, such as contributing to the housework.

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Leekeisha - posted on 05/20/2012

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A stay at home mom has no second job, she is with her kids all night and all day. I understand you don't feel appreciated,but I dont understand why you need to be acknowledge for what you are suppose to do as a mom period. Learn to appreciate yourself and take his money and buy you something nice when he acts up.I wouldn't stop cleaning because I can't sleep in a dirty home but if the bs is getting out of control take you and your child out of the unsafe environment. It's not healthy for the baby. Good luck

Katherine - posted on 04/30/2012

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I was, now he's my ex. Ha ha.

Maybe you 2 need some counseling. He obviously doesn't get it. I mean really? I would stop doing his laundry, don't get what he needs, leave dishes in the sink, slob the house up! See how he likes that!

I'm not saying this to be vindictive, but merrily to show him how much you really do. Getting 3 hours of sleep a night is ridiculous. AND you work 2 jobs.

I would be absolutely exhausted, which I was. That's one of the reasons I left, there were many, but that was one. Don't be passive, be VERY assertive. Tell him if he's going to act that way then you are literally going on strike because your body can't handle it.

There is NO reason for him not to help!

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