Baby #3

[deleted account] ( 4 moms have responded )

I have a little girl that just turned 3 and a baby boy that is 8 months old. My husband and I want one more precious addition to our family, but I can't decide when we want to add our next bundle of joy. Our kids are 28 months apart right now, and I am a stay at home mom. My husband works 60-70 hours a week (we own a restaurant, so he is basically always on call). I am a VERY hands on mommy. The hardest thing for me when my son was born was not being able to give my daughter as much quality time as I wanted to due to marathon nursing sessions, no sleep, and all the other new baby adjustments. Now that we are adjusted I am really happy with the age gap. One minute I think I would like to have another right after my son turns 2, but then I worry that he will be such a baby still, and I don't want him to fall into typical middle child situation. Then I worry that if I wait until he is 3 that my daughter and baby #3 will be so far apart that they will never bond as well as I'd like them to. I've heard some people say that adjusting the family dynamic to baby #2 is harder, and some say that adjusting to baby #3 is. I don't want to cheat any of my children out of precious time and attention they deserve during these important first years, but I also want them to be close enough in age that they can really enjoy each other's company.

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[deleted account]

Thanks Jackie! My mom is close by and is a huge help. The more I hear from people the more I feel like closer will be better!

Jackie - posted on 04/06/2010

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Hi Jessica,

I have three boys, 4, 2 and 11 months. Number 3 was my "surprise child". I was really worried how I was going to cope especially when my first two were so active and full on. Even though while the youngest is a baby and needs more attention you can involve the other two my make them your "little helpers". My boys fight over who is going to get a nappy for me or whatever I need help with. I praise them by telling them that they are great little helpers and they are wonderful. I try to make an effort during the day to pull the older ones aside for their own cuddles and kisses and when I can take turns in taking them to the park or pool for some one on one time. this might be hard if your husband works alot but maybe if you have a good friend or relative who can help. They will have times when they are craving for your attention and this can result in misbehaviour but you can only do what you can. Three is a hand full but as they are close in age they will grow up to be great mates. Lots of kisses and cuddles, praise and special time one on one keeps them all feeling loved.

[deleted account]

I am slightly worried about competition. But since I have 1 boy and 1 girl as of now I don't think it will be a problem. I think it is the parents job to try and prevent that from happening. I have a brother 2 1/2 years younger than me. My parents did a great job supporting us each in our own interests and talents.

[deleted account]

i didnt have close age kids oldest 13 ,2nd is 8 nd 3rd is 11mths ,theve each had individual mum time then when others are at school which is nice i didnt plan to have them far apart tho but they all get on very close even with the difrent things they like to play the older ones will take time to do younger games which is good ,i think no matter how close or far apart theyl stil be close if you keep em close:) i take my hat off to those mums with close age kids say 2 in nappies ect i had breaks from the nappy stage lol if there so close in age do they compete more?

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