babysitting vs playdate

Brandy - posted on 06/13/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

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i have a 2yr old daughter with no brothers and sisters and we dont have close neighbors with children, i have several friends and family with kids her age and they get along great, but for some reason i cant schedual a playdate. most of them are working parents so i understand if theyre busy. recently i asked my cousin if her son could come over and play with jenna sometime and i told her if shes busy thats ok she could just drop him off and she agreed, and now shes dropping off both of her kids which includes a 5yr old for me to babysit while shes at work. i thought maybe i didnt make myself clear so when i tried again with a friend of mine who has a 2yr old and a 6yr old i specifically asked if the two yr old could come over for a playdate sometime and i told him you could just drop her off or i could take them someplace and he agreed, but when he showed up he had both kids and told me his kids were a package deal i didnt want to make the kids leave so i agreed to babysit and he didnt come back for 6hrs! i feel like im being taken advantage of when all i wanted was a friend for my daughter and now ive become a free babysitter! but if i tell them to stop jenna wont have anyone to play with plus im the one who offered to do it although that wasnt my intention, has anyone else been in a similar situation? what should i do?

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Christy - posted on 06/13/2011

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Do not let them walk all over you! Be VERY specific that the play date will last an hour and a half and no longer (you set the designated time period) and that only the two year old is invited. Maybe mention that your babysitting rates are $3 an hour per kid so if they drop off both kids for the day it'll cost them. If they show up with both kids again let them know they need to pay in advance and you'd like to know exactly when they should be back. If they act shocked or say anything about it, you should be honest with them and tell them you felt abused last time, but you'd really just like a friend for your little one for a few minutes. If you don't nip this now, these people will take advantage of you forever.

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Medic - posted on 06/13/2011

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I think you should break it down and be specific. I have friends who have multiple kids with only one around my sons age and none around my daughters age. I only take the ones that my son plays with and all of my friends are cool with that. One of my very close friends has 3 kids and her middle one is my sons best friend I NEVER take the other two unless she is in a bind because I just can't deal with their special needs, and they do not play well with my kids. My friend has no problem and is happy I was honest with only wanting one.

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