Bathtime alone???

Brandi - posted on 11/27/2009 ( 28 moms have responded )

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My daughter is almost 4 years old and tonight in the tub, she asked me to go to my room (right next to the bathroom) and let her bathe alone. I REFUSED as I believe she is still too young to bathe herself. How old were your kids when you allowed them to bathe themselves with you handy and nearby, but not in the bathroom??

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Cathleen - posted on 12/30/2009

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My children are younger than yours but I let my 2 1/2 play in the bathtub by herself, but I also check on her numerous times. It sounds like your daughter is wanting a little independence. I have taught my 19 month old and 2 1/2 to wash themselves with soap and a washclothe and a cup to rinse themselves off. Maybe you could wash her hair, give her wet wash clothes and a little soap and let her try to wash herself while you leave for a few minutes and then you go in and rinse her. Your daughter may just enjoy having some time by herself while she is in the bath. Hope this helps

Erin - posted on 11/27/2009

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My daughter is only 3 and of course, I won't leave her by herself. However, my friend's son turned 4 yesterday and she has allowed him to take a bath and a shower by himself for close to a year now. Personally, I think 4 is a good age to let them start bathing themselves, just keep a close eye on her.

Julia - posted on 11/27/2009

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my son is three, i still wash him but after that i leave and go about my business leaving the bathroom door open and checking on him every once and a while.

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Jennifer - posted on 12/30/2009

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I think a lot depends on the child. My son will turn 6 tomorrow, and I still have to bathe him. I've tried to let him do it on his own, but he doesn't get himself clean. My daughter is 4 1/2 and has been washing herself for almost a year. I am always close to the bathroom and check in on her once in a while. She knows not to stand in the tub, and I make sure all shavers are put in the closet or drawers.

Christy - posted on 12/30/2009

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i don't know if there is necessarily a right age but since your daughter is 4 and requesting that you leave i think that should be fine. personally i would stay on the same floor as the bathroom so i could pop my head in every few minutes and also give her hair a final rinse before she gets out just to make sure the shampoo's all out.

[deleted account]

Just hang out and tell her your cleaning the bathroom. Or make a game out of brushing your hair and teeth while she's scrubbing up. My daughter is 7 and she dosen't mind that I hang out in the bathroom while she's in the tub, so long as I'm not hovering over her every move. She has extemely long hair (only trimmed once in her life) so I still help with creme rinse.

Bernadette - posted on 12/01/2009

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my son is 5 and my daughter i 3 and i leave them in the bath alone. I do leave the bathroom door open and I will go in and check on them and also call out to them and ask how they are doing. I am trying to teach them to answer me when I call out to them this is why I ask them as opposed to going in all the time. If you don't feel comfortable leaving her sit by the door. I'll take my laptop or a book and sit right outside the door.

Caroline - posted on 12/01/2009

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my son isnt 4 till 1st january, his been having baths alone for the past 4 months, although he does not offten have one on his own now as i have a 1yr old and they like to play together! so im ALWAYS in the bathroom :O), although when my mum has my 4 yr old she never leaves the bathroom, i guess at 4 they like their independance, my son wants to do everything himself!! the kitchen outta bounds though!!! good luck our kids grow up way too fast!! i dont think id let him in my shower far too slippery, i ALWAYS but him in bath, and ALWAYS get him out, and I wash his hair, although he wont let me wash his body, only daddy can do that! , he started going to bathroom to brush his teeth yesterday without asking although i like to know his done it properly, just make sure your not far away, im usually doing my ironing in the next room or making beds, so im near :O) xx

Talina - posted on 11/30/2009

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My son is 3 years old and I am quite confident of leaving him in the bath alone. When it comes to cleaning him I do it because he definately wouldn't do a proper job of it. I guess it comes down to the individual child and how comfortable you are leaving them in the bath alone. Why don't you try leaving her for a little bit to start with and see how she goes and then increase it until you are confident.

Deborah - posted on 11/30/2009

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My guy was 4 1/2 when I started to let him play in the bathtub by himself but not out of earshot . He talks and has such a wonderful sense of imagination that I check on him (without him knowing). Only if I do not hear his cute voice in there do I let him know I am checking on him. Follow your heart...listen to what it tells you. You will never go wrong when you listen to your heart.

User - posted on 11/30/2009

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My children where 3 each when I gave that independents remember that’s really what she is asking for just be close for a little help mom. My daughter was just fine cleaning her self and having great bath room safety while my son asked for help until he was 10.

Char - posted on 11/30/2009

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My daughter is turning six the second of this month. I always stay with her I might say sit down I'm grabbing a towel but I was six when I stood up in the tub slipped broke open my chin and passed out if it werent for my sister coming into the bathroom I wouldn't be here. Make it fun it's only fifteen/twenty moments. I worked in the ER so if you do leave just keep talking to your child and checking in. Thanks

Michelle - posted on 11/29/2009

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I stay and make sure my son and daughter get their hair clean (most of the time washing hers) but I will leave the bathroom with the door open and just outside and wait for each of them to finish. I have been doing it since my son was 3 or 4 and it has really just started with my daughter and she is turning 4 next month

Kelly - posted on 11/29/2009

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I didn't let mine be responsible for washing themselves until about age 7. Younger than that, their washing is very "hit or miss", and they can't really wash and rinse their own hair, etc. I do let my three-year-old play in the tub sometimes after I have washed her, and the only problem is that she likes to splash a lot, sometimes getting the bathroom very wet! I suppose you would have to try and see how wild she gets, as to whether you feel like she is safe to play in there alone. If she wants to start washing herself already, have her show you how she does it, so you can see if she is able to reach everywhere.

Denise - posted on 11/28/2009

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It was not 4 for me but at some point there will have to be an independence remember the saying anyone can choke on a glass of water my children were about 8 but perhaps she would let you stay in the bathroom if you sat on the floor next to the tub and read a book or sing a song together thats how I use to get out of the "mom i want my privacy. Good l
luck to you

Heather - posted on 11/28/2009

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My son is three i wash him up then pull the drain to allow the water out and tell him when the water is out he'll be done then leave him to play the rest of the time till the water is out.. I check on him and talk to him from the other room though it's sbout 4-5 min only. But children need their space too!

Myra - posted on 11/28/2009

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My daughter is a lot younger than yours (she's about 18mo), but soon as she wants to bathe herself, I'm going to let her give it a go. As far as leaving her alone in the tub...I'd wait until she's shown that she knows how to bathe herself and isn't, for lack of better terms, foolish around water. I don't know when my mom started leaving me alone to bathe myself...I always remember being in the bath alone or taking a bath with my sisters, but I doubt she left me alone (even with them) until at least 3 or 4. I say give it a try if she's asking...just keep her within your sight (but stay out of hers) until you feel secure with her being alone.

Ginger - posted on 11/28/2009

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I agree with you Amber is 5 and I still help her out if I don't she will play in the water and never wash a thing but her legs and tummie.lol

Sarah - posted on 11/28/2009

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My sons nearly eight and I still wash his hair in the bath but he started to bathe himself about a year ago. I don't think there is a right or wrong age just go with the flow.

Cailin - posted on 11/27/2009

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My kids both bathe themselves (3 & 4), but I am always in the area right outside the door. They both keep a constant chatter up, and as soon as I hear quiet, I'm on them like white on rice. I still have to wash them just to make sure they are clean (my son is famous for saying he washed when he didn't), but that's it.

[deleted account]

My daughters are 3, 5 and 16. I still stay in the bathroom with the 3 and 5 year old. There are alot of things that can happen in the bathtub. It is slippery - a 4 year old girl fell in the tub not too long ago and bumped her head. She said she was fine and her mother believed her but she died at the hospital later that evening.

My oldest daughter was probably 6 or 7 when I first started letting her take a shower with me outside the door. I got a chair and a book so I could be close by if something happened. By 7 or 8 she was good to go and I could hear from the other rooms in the house.

I would say use your judgment on this one depending on her maturity level. You could tell her that you will turn around while she is in the tub and or pull the curtain closed a bit I would not leave her in their by herself yet I think 4 years old is too young.

[deleted account]

yeah i agree with all.. and i like kylies suggestions, be within earshot, next to where shes at.. i think its good she wants a lil privacy.. good thing to learn at 4.. by boys bathe together in my bathroom we have master bedroom.. i'm right there, i can put away laundry and clean my bathroom while they're in there.. works out pretty well

Tracey - posted on 11/27/2009

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my daughter is 11 and she started having a bath by herself at 2 only because she would go in the bath and I would have a shower at the same time right next to her. My son was more independent and he likes showers from 3yo.

Brandi - posted on 11/27/2009

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Thanks everyone. My daughter has just recently realized that being naked is a personal thing and doesn't like to get dressed in front of people, doesn't want anyone in the bathroom when she uses the potty. She's sooo funny. She's like "go outside mommy, i'm on the potty" lol.

[deleted account]

It really would be a personal thing, some kids don't want to be bathed, and some don't care. As long as you are near by, and/or comming in and out once they are 4 or so that would be fine. I used to be a nanny, and the youngest was 4, and wouldn't let me bath her (dispite what her mum said), when I talked to her mum I was then told to leave her to do it herself, so I did, but I always was right outside, and made a few "trips" in there to get some things I "needed"

Julia - posted on 11/27/2009

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Quoting Brandi:

I was way off. I was thinking I was gonna be all in the bathroom til she was around 8 lol. I asked my mom and she was all like "i don't remember, like kindergarten or first grade?" I figured though when she asked me to leave that maybe it was about time to let go a little.(I still don't see myself leaving the room, but maybe I'll sit on the potty lol



thats a good first step, then like sit out side the room with a book or something, and just every once and awhile look it to make sure shes ok, as long as you dont fill the tub up like crazy shell be fine

Brandi - posted on 11/27/2009

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I was way off. I was thinking I was gonna be all in the bathroom til she was around 8 lol. I asked my mom and she was all like "i don't remember, like kindergarten or first grade?" I figured though when she asked me to leave that maybe it was about time to let go a little.(I still don't see myself leaving the room, but maybe I'll sit on the potty lol

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