burnt out and stressed ..................help

Sheri - posted on 10/21/2011 ( 8 moms have responded )

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im a stay at home mom that does everything and dont go anywhere except for what has to be done. i have two sets of twins, the oldest is 14 and the youger ones are 8. (3 girls and one boy) my son is autistic and i have no free time for me. all i do is go to school meetings clean the house and ect. i feel ther is no time in the day to do everything. everyone has somewhere to go or something to do, so i have to take or pick them up. when i do have some free time they have something to do. dont get me wrong my kids are great and i love them to death, but i just have no time for myself. i cant get a job cause my son has alot of problems so im on call all day. oh my younger kids wont stay the nite anywhere far away. im sorry if this sounds like im doing a poor pitty me but im just burnt out at home and everything. some plz help

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Sheri - posted on 10/23/2011

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i might do that i have been thinking i was going to get some bubble bath and lock myself in the bath room tomorrow.

Kathy - posted on 10/23/2011

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This is something I struggle with all the time too. How do I unplug from such a crazy existence. And, having a child who also has signicficant issues, I know the "on call" feeling. I also know it feels impossible. Can you start with 10 minutes. Go to Starbucks and get a cup of coffee, read a magazine article, unplug the phone, for just 10 minutes. Nothing horrible is going to happen that can't be dealt with 10 minutes later. I know it feels like the world will crash down, if it helps start with 5. All the comments are right, we are no good to our kids if we are not together. I always remember the ariline advice, put your oxgen mask on first, then your childs. Knowing it and practicing it are two different things. I' m going to commit to turning my phone off for 10 minutes tomorow when all three kids are in shcool. Good luck!

Sheri - posted on 10/23/2011

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all my kids go to school but my son doesnt go till 1230 and he gets out at 3 so during that time i go do what i have to. i dont help out at the school its just meetings for my son. the one thing i noticed is that it feels like i have a leash from my hip to him. he wont let me out of his sight. hubby is tring but right now money is really tight. my hubby knows that i need a mommy break really bad. he is triing to figure out when we could do it. i told him after the hollidays. thanks for the help and i might try to do that. oh my house is not that clean i just do a little in it, and i dont have many friends well i have one but she usually up and gone early.

Kelina - posted on 10/21/2011

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And the others are right you need to get out of the house for some you time every once in a while. whether for a date night or to go to a movie or i like taking time for myself to get my hair cut. adult conversation and a once a year errand all in one go! you time is essential or you're going to lose your mind. good luck!

Kelina - posted on 10/21/2011

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This is the fairy tale that should have been read to us as little

girls!



Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said: " Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.

One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so. "

That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself I don't freakin think so!

Kelina - posted on 10/21/2011

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i'm assuming there is a significant other in the picture as you're a stay at home mom and he helped make these kids he can help take care of them-and you! Lol this kind of reminds me of an e-mail i got years ago, i'll post it so you can have a laugh. It's great.

[deleted account]

You HAVE to take time for you. Are your kids in school or do you home school? If you are home schooling, find a group and do a subject swap with another mom. You can take some time for you while she has your kids. If they are in school, carve out some of the day for yourself by cutting back on school functions. You do not have to do everything they ask you to--limit your school volunteering to 1 or 2 days a week.

Streamline your chores and errands to work in time for you to sit down with a cup of tea and relax.

Take one night a month (or 2 if you can swing it) to go out with your friends--nothing crazy, but a book club, exercise class, or just a nice dinner to chat over would be nice. Your husband can handle the kids for one evening. Then let him do the same.

Make date nights a priority. At least once a week, once the kids are in bed, forget the left over chores and relax with hubby on the sofa for a movie, sitcoms, or just chatting. Let it evolve without trying and it will soon turn romantic.

Sabrina - posted on 10/21/2011

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Hi Sheri, I know this may sound crazy, but if you don't take time out for you, you won't be able to function properly...and this will cause health problems down the road. Maybe try asking hubby for a "mommy break", that allows you to leave the house for about an hour and go get your hair shampood, or massage or perhaps a yoga class or your nails done! I hope this was helpful..wish I lived close so I could give a hand..

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