Child spacing

Elizabeth - posted on 02/14/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I just had a little boy Nov/09 and my partner and I are talking about the next one already (I know its early for it lol) I think we should wait a year or two, he likes bigger spacing. He has an 8 year old and a 3 year old from previous marriages. They don't really play together or related very well because of the difference in ages. I grew up with brothers and sisters spaced one to two years apart and think it was great, he and his brother we close in age too and he hated it. Just wondering what everyone else thinks is the 'ideal' spacing for siblings? Thanks.

6 Comments

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Chantel - posted on 02/15/2010

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I think it depends on each child as well as the parents. My dh was NEVER ready for another child. I just went by what felt right. 1 and 2 are 21 months apart - perfect for them. 2 and 3 are 4.5 years apart. 3 and 4 are 3.5 years apart. I never planned a certain number of children. I need the time between the last 2 -- it wasn't about the kids themselves. It is absolutely an individual choice.

Sharon - posted on 02/15/2010

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all mine are 1 year apart and its hard but i love it! All the nappies and baby stuff are out of the way and you will still be young enough to enjoy grandkids etc when your last one grows up. Plus being so close they'll all be going through the same stuff and can support each other. But if you are only having 2 i wouold recoomend a big age gap at least 5 years. More than two 2 years is ideal

Allie - posted on 02/15/2010

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good luck. i would wait. i have a 18 monther and we are starting to think about number two.

Sarah - posted on 02/14/2010

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Hi, I have two little girls and they are 15months apart. My eldest is now 3 1/2 and my youngest has just turned 2, I think there are both pros and cons for having them close together. In my experience some of the pros are closeness between siblings, I can afford to take time off work in one stint until they are both in school, they play together and keep each other busy and a few of the cons I have found are that they do squabble (a lot), I feel like I haven't had as much 1 on 1 time with my youngest child (but when my eldest goes to preschool next year she will have time then). Good luck with your decision =)

Susan - posted on 02/14/2010

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all of my kids are 5 yrs apart. not because of any plan, thats just the way it worked out. if i had to do it over again i would've had them much closer together, because none of the 3 have anything in common and i have to practically force them to do anything together! they fight constantly because they are all always getting into each others things. on the other hand the older ones are very protective of the little ones and love to care for them when something is wrong. closer siblings still fight but at least they have more things in common.

Kim - posted on 02/14/2010

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what works for some dosn't work for others. My plan of 2 in 3 years was somewhat thwarted, i had my duaghter in 2003....she has autism, so we decided to wait longer tohave naother, as she is now 6 and stillhas a toddler mentality........i had my son in april 2009 so ihave a 6 year gap between my 2. Which is i think too long, but life somtimes dosn't work out. Give your wee boy 18 months one on one with mama...bond and then try for another. Having two little ones is hard work...

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