Clingy like crazy!

Christine - posted on 04/08/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )




My daughter, Ava, is now 23 weeks. She has more recently become very clingy... She will barely even go to my husband. When I put her down she screams bloody murder. I can't find a way to be able to get anything done because she won't do anything independently at this point. It's driving me absolutely nutty! Is anyone else having this problem? Or does anyone have any suggestions for how to deal with this??? My ped. said that around this age she will start to show signs of stranger anxiety and not really go to other people, but that is only PART of the problem I'm dealing with... Please, I need advice.. I can't listen to this screaming all day long, nor can I hold her for every waking moment!


View replies by

Claudia - posted on 04/09/2009




I'm with the baby carrier crowd!  That worked great for me.  I also had a play yard set up and I would put her in it for short times, each time lengthening the time by 2 minutes or so.  I would lay her in the middle with a toy and some music on and when I couldn't stand the screaming I would pick her up and put her in the baby carrier, then do the same thing again later.  I think this is one of those "battle of wills" things that is so hard to beat.  Stick to it though, it's only a phase and it has to end sometime soon.  Good luck!

Terri-ann - posted on 04/09/2009




I reli feel for you guys.... i never had that problem with my daughter who is my first, she was happy to go with anyone who would give her attention so i dont reli know what to suggest, but if you think a carrier will work for you then do it..... i just feel it might prolong the process of bub getting used to not being there so often....... i mean right from day one although i reli wanted to cuddle my daughter all the time etc i forced myself not to..... is this something you found yourself doing to start with or were you one that would put bub down..... please dont think im being nasty as i reli am not trying to....... its hard i know but the one thing that does come up is controlled crying, have you tryed tht or does bub just cry and cry? one other thing do you have a baby chair? maybe sitting bub in tht while you do the chores, talking through what your doing may help!! hope this babble is any use to you!!

Krystal - posted on 04/08/2009




my daughter wouldn't even go to her father for the first 6 months of life. it was not easy! after that it was only myself or him until she was a year old - she used to scream when someone came too close or held their arms out to her. i would definitely say that my baby carrier was a god-sent. i dont know what i would have done with out it! First it was the infantino sling rider when she was little, then it was the carrier that was for front or back carrying, and last it was a Peanut Shell sling, which i used from about 7 months to 13 months (she's small for her age as she was only 18 lbs at 1 year). honestly i don't know what i would have done without the carriers - especially since my son is 13 months older than she is. when i joined my local MOMS Club and started getting more social it seemed to help - at least she wouldn't scream unless someone actually picked her up! but now, at 20 months old, she is much more independent. it helped when she started walking.

so hang in there. eventually she'll get over it. and you'll be sad the day she doesn't want you! (at least a little bit)

good luck!

[deleted account]

I agree, the baby carrier was a big help with my oldest. Since I did not want to carry my middle and my youngest, I had to try other methods of keeping them quiet while not holding them. What I did was try to find ways to direct their attention away from me (a new toy) or letting them do something they usually can't do (play in the cabinet with the plastic containers while I wash dishes...hold mommy's cell phone while I clear the table, etc.) Other things that worked: singing songs while I'm doing something and not holding them...talking to them about everything that I'm doing, and how I will be done real soon so I can play with them again. I also found that giving them a juice cup or tasty snack helped them to be okay with not being picked up immediately. Sitting my 1 year old in the high chair with toys, juice, and bite sized pieces of food he can feed himself helps out a LOT! Also, he will sit on the counter while I wash fruit/cook/unload the dish washer, but I have to keep a sharp eye on him -- he's a fidgety one.

Emily - posted on 04/08/2009




When my son was that age he was the same way. My husband would laugh at me because he would walk in the door and I would be doing dishes or laundry with the baby in the baby bjorn holder. I understand what you are going through....I could get nothing done because I always had to be holding him, but the baby carrier really helped. It is also a good work out too! Eventually my son got out of that stage, and your baby will too, but my best advice is the baby carrier!! Hope I could help & best of luck.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms