Coping with doing all myself at home, how many of you do this? and how do you keep from going mad?

Cristina - posted on 05/28/2010 ( 7 moms have responded )

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I have a 25 month old that from one day to the next has become a very hyper child, jumping of things won't sit for a second, fights to take a nap and now became a biter and is hitting, I have some people that tell me to take him to day care, but I have no extra money to do so, I do not work and my husband works and gets paid just on commission, so money is tight, with all of the hyper action I have to clean house cook, do laundry mow the lawn and while doing all that make sure the baby doesn't kill himself jumping of a table or chair, he unplugs all the safety plugs and so I'm very tired, I knew being a mom was not going to be easy but I honestly have come to my wits end no rest and too much work, and on top of this my husband wants me to get a job, not like he helps at home at all, so am I wrong for wanting better for me sometimes? Help please any advise will be welcomed.

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Armanda - posted on 05/28/2010

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I have a 28 month old who is also very hyper, and does not nap. Some days I feel as if I might loose my mind. Luckily, nicer weather is here. I would strongly recommend going outside as much as possible, everyday if you can. Try to visit all of the different parks in the area if you can. The park district web sites usually have a printable list. Trying making a routine of going to a new park each week. Little kids love to help out. Find small things he can help you do around the house. My son loves to help me mop. Pushing the button on the Swiffer and watching the cleaning fluid shoot out fascinates him. He also likes to stand on a little stool and put the laundry into the washing machine with me. I also find a lot of free, cheap activities through the Chicago Parent magazine-its free and a lot of libraries carry them. Playgroups are great too. If you have a friend with kids who lives closeby, take turns watching each others kids, so the other can run errands, do house work, etc. If you are very concerned about his behavior, you can always mention it to the doctor at the next well visit. My son was recently evaluated through the early intervention program, and is now recieving some therapy services to help him. Good luck!

Sarah - posted on 05/28/2010

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Set a routine. Kids do better with a routine. Have a set time you get up (if you don't already). Then if you can get outside in the morning and in the afternoon for at least 30 mins. The more fresh air the better sometimes, so if you can do more then do that. Go for walks and look for bugs, animals, etc. Draw letters with calk on the sidewalk and make a game learning the alphabet. Do some running. This will help with getting that energy out and challenging the brain at the same time. Have a set time (within about 30 mins or so) for lunch, so this keeps consistant. Then a set rest/nap time. By getting that fresh air and exercise this will help with getting him to rest for awhile. Have it be the same time each day and for about the same amount of time. I do day care and as kids become closer to 3 yrs old they tend to not nap each day, so instead I allow them to watch a movie (about 1 1/2 to 2 hrs). But in order for that movie to stay on they must lay pretty much still and not talk. If they are not laying still or they are talking and I have given a warning then the movie goes off and they must close their eyes for the rest of quite time. This leads to the next thing be consistant with discipline and follow through. This will help with him not being so hyper. It sounds funny, but kids want boundries (even if they fight them). Kids that know when they step over a boundary they will be disciplined are often times better behaved (most of the time).

Having a set routine and schedule will also help allow you to get the stuff you need to get done done. Have a routine for cleaning and such also. Some things your son can help you with. It might take you a bit longer to do, but it is teaching him. He can help fold laundry....some you may need to refold, but as time goes on he will get better. Even with cooking. If it is something he can help pour this will allow him to help and you to get what you need done. Setting the table is another thing he can do.

Jessica - posted on 05/28/2010

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take him to some playgroups. my daughter is active and ive found 3 in my area and we go each morning, and it seems to get rid of the excess energy from being inside all the time. or take him to the park let him run around outside (it does wonders for them trust me) i thought my child was adhd but nope, i just wasnt giving her what she needed, which was a way to blow off her energy she didnt know what to do with.

most play groups are free in any municipality.
good luck

Christy - posted on 05/28/2010

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If you can join a mom's group for play dates, it will help you out a lot. It will get your child socialized, and give you an opportunity to talk to other moms. They are usually free or have a minimal charge to join (mine's 25 bucks a year) Got to momsclub.org to see if there's a chapter in your area. If not you can always start one.

Sandra - posted on 05/28/2010

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I would say start with the safety stuff so you don't have to worry about that. The safety plugs can be replaced with socket covers from walmart. Then take sometime for yourself his and your child. I know that it sounds silly with everything else you have to do but when you take time to take him to a play group, or to the park to get some of his energy out you will find that he will take naps better because he is more tired and then you will have more time to do the house chores.

I am speaking from experience. My son is 11 months old and has been crawling and climbing since he was about 8 months old. He never napped except for 20 minute naps and it wasn't enough time for me to do anything. Now I take him to the park for 1 hour a day and it makes all the difference. He runs for 1 hour and I get 2 hours of a nap to get the house clean and all the other stuff I need. It is wonderful. The other thing is I feel better too. I am less stressed and because of going to the park I have lost weight and feel better about myself too.

I would recommend trying it. At first it is hard to get the energy up but if you stick to it it should work.

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Sheri - posted on 05/28/2010

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I am the same way as you glad to hear I am not the only one with a husband that doesn't help much. I have a 24 month old and a 10wk old and now that my husband is finally working full time I am at my wits end almost every day now from having to deal with 2 kids all the time as he comes home from work and stays downstairs playing his computer games he wont go change and come back upstairs to give me a break unless I physically leave the house.

I am on maternity/parental leave right now and seriously thinking of finding a dayhome for my daughter (2yrs) at least once a wk to give me a break from her and am seriously thinking of going back to work already as I am finding I am unable to cope with my daughters constant whining.

Tiffany - posted on 05/28/2010

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I totally understand where you are coming from. I have a 3 1/2 year old, 19 month old, and am expecting my 3rd due in August. I am a SAHM which I love, but there are times that when they dont listen it is very exhausting. My husband comes home about 2 times a week and usually doesnt even help with the kids. The other nights he stays out in his shed working/messing around just so he doesnt have to come in the house and help out. Men just dont understand at all how much work it is. If my house isnt clean he looks at me like I'm lazy....a comment like "Like you have it soo hard". Only because he works outside the home. I got so tired of it. About 2 months ago I found a work from home opportunity that has helped me from going crazy. I get to chat with other moms and sometimes this helps me. Plus I feel more important because my husband cannot say that he is the only one making money. I have also went back to school so I am rather busy. I thought that 2 years olds were hard...When my daughter turned 3 it was alot worse and she doesnt believe in naps anymore. When my kids go to bed at night is when I relax, watch my soap operas, and have peace and quiet. Hopefully something will work for you soon!! Good luck!

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