Depressed mom

Jennifer_whitfield85 - posted on 01/13/2014 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My husband and I just moved into a 5th wheel and we have a 2 year old son who seema to have more energy than I can handle. He works full time and I stay at home with our son. I have no friends and my family is usually to busy to talk about anything. I already suffer from depression and don't get me wrong, I love my son and husband to the end of the world and beyond, but I feel like I don't love myself anymore. Where we live, it rains almost constantly so I can't let my son out to play. And obviously the 5th wheel isn't big enough to fill my son's energy-running out problems. I don't ever get sleep, and when I do, my son wakes up and, in turn, wakes me up. Here lately I have been a bucket of tears, which upsets my husband. He is a wonderful man, but he doesn't understand that when I say I need "me time" that it isn't because of him. Sometimes we argue over it for hours until I give up and say nevermind. I'm afraid I will end up resenting him for that someday. I don't know how to explain that yes, I love him dearly, but I desperately need time away from him and my son, not because I don't like being around them, but for the sake of my sanity... Please, I need advice sbefore this wonderful marriage ends up a resentful one...

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Angie - posted on 01/14/2014

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I am also going through a similar situation. I have a 14 month old son and unsupportive husband. There are many days I feel depressed and hopeless. It can make you feel like a bad mom as I do at times. All we can do is our best. I know firsthand how hard being a stay at home mom is. I hope you get to feeling better soon. I know that it helps me to try and sit and think about all I am thankful for. It puts everything in perspective, at least for a while.

Your not alone :)

Michele - posted on 01/14/2014

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I went through something similar and every once in a while still do. Is your husband good with your son? Does he give you a hard time if you say you are stepping out for a bit? My hubby is very good with our daughter and when I need that "me" time I let hime know. His work schedule varies from day to day and sometimes works weekends as well. When he is home on a weekend I make sure to get out of the house, even if its only for 20 minutes. I too don't know anyone around here so I spend all my time alone with the baby. Try to get out alone while he's home, take a walk, go for a drive, grab a cup of coffee, sit in a park or library and read for a bit. I also joined a mommy and me class. It meets once a week. Some you pay for and others (mostly at churches or libraries) will charge you about $5 for coffee and bagels. It gets you out of the house and allows you to interact with other adults. I'm pretty shy but once I did it i felt better. Look online for activities that the 2 of you to get out. Most importantly take that time for yourself when he is home!

Kelly - posted on 01/14/2014

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Sorry you are having a rough time, Jennifer. I know firsthand how low things can feel some days/weeks. I don't know where you live, but I was wondering if you have anything nearby like we do to get out of the house and use up energy. Our local mall has a really nice play area for little ones with climbing structures and one small slide(free), our local McDonald's and Burger King both have indoor play areas(free), and there is an indoor gym with balls, hoops, bounce house and little toddler bikes for open play.(about $5) I would look around on line to see what is nearby and inexpensive. We have found so many things that only cost the gas it takes to get there! The more you can get your son's energy out, the better he will probably sleep and therefore you as well. I also thought it might work to suggest that your husband take your son out for some daddy/son time, giving you some free time without it seeming like you want to get away from them? I'm not sure about that part. It sounds like a sore spot between you. Also, check around to see if there is a local mom's group in your area- it sounds like you would benefit from some company of other women. Even a few hours a week really help in my experience. *hugs*

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Frenulum - posted on 01/14/2014

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Have you tried drinking heavily? High grade works for me, I just ignore him.

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