Disabled Moms

Susan - posted on 09/13/2010 ( 17 moms have responded )

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I was wondering if there were any other Moms that are disabled and caring for their children?

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Christy - posted on 09/15/2010

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I'm disabled and I had my daughter 7 months ago. I had a spinal fusion and other surgeries on my left knee and ankle so its hard for me to be able to run around and be able to go out with her because sometimes the pain gets so bad. But just know that no matter what you can or can't do your kids will love you and be so happy to have a mom that cares! I hope this helps! Good luck!

Sarah - posted on 09/15/2010

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Hi, Susan! I'm not disabled, but my mom is. She has Cerebral Palsy complicated by mild Spina Bifida, as well as severe arthritis. She raised 4 kids as a stay-at-home mom, and I happen to thing we all turned out pretty darn well. It was not always easy, I know. There were days when she would cry herself to sleep at night, and mornings she did not want to wake up. She didn't always make it to our school performances, and wasn't able to do some "mom" things I know she would have liked. I would get angry sometimes and wish I had a different Mom. I felt really guilty about that for a while, but you know what I've realized since becoming a (physically healthy) mom of three? EVERY mom feels inadequate at times. EVERY mother will have moments (or days, or weeks, or years!) that they don't know what to do or how they will get through it. And every child will have moments (or days or years) in which they wish their life was different. Being disabled won't affect your ability to parent and to raise happy functional children. In fact, one thing I've noticed about myself and my siblings is that we are more aware to other peoples limitations, yet we don't judge anyone based on their appearance or abilities. Its not that we're better or nicer, but being raised with a mom who had some special needs made it normal for us, so we don't think twice when someone has special needs. My mom did it, and I know you can too! Keep thinking positive, and all will turn out well. ♥♥

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Bunny's - posted on 07/15/2012

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i am a mom of a 5 r old little girl starting kindergarten this coming school ear.
i have chronic atoimmne.cronic pain problems and now (in ma) i broke m ankle.
so the crtial summer months tht i need to keep her happy,busy and adjsted with playdates and activities i havent been cleared to drive, and my household shares 1 car for a while longer.
shes going crazy due to my problems and in-abilities. its a rough summer rigt now

Shannintipton - posted on 05/08/2011

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YES Yohoo Pick me. Why? What do you need to know. Yes, it is very hard. Hard on my husband too. Really hard on him. Makes me sad.I am special enough to have both a brain injury and physical disabilities. And now not being able to move (temporally I hope) I would take the brain injury any day. At least with the brain your to stupid to realize (In my case only). Yes always that last one to know you screwed up. LOL. But not being able to walk, stand, sit or even lay down sucks big time. okay, what was the question LOL. Thanks for listening. {:+)

Jody - posted on 05/07/2011

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I have meniere's disease and sometimes drop attacks come with that, where I'm so dizzy that I hit the floor and can't tel which way is up. Consequently I broke my foot a year and a half ago and have only just had the surgery to fix it so I've been extremely limited as a parent in that time. So I relate to the feelings of powerlessness and inadequacy, and I've been dying to take my kids outside and play with them too. My youngest (I have 3) was six months old when it happened and is now 2 and I have often felt like an external observer. One thing I have learned through it though, is to focus on what I can do; even when it's not much. When I'm dizzy with meniere's, my daughter (5) loves the opportunity to help, so I let her (even when it may not actually be helpful) and I think it's doing her good. I can't walk at all at the moment, so to play with that youngest one I mentioned (we call him a tornado because he is full of energy) I let him run to me on my bed over and over (being careful of my foot of course) and give him a cuddle and a funny noise and let him do all the work. I'm not suggesting that those things will necessarily work for you, but what I mean is that quite often the kids just want love and attention and a funny noise or laughing at their antics can sometimes be enough. My husband also has muscular dystrophy, and is becoming more physically limited, but they seem to be adjusting with him and love him just the same. I hope that helps in some way. Hang in there. I think it's amazing that you're raising kids while coping with lupus!

Lady Heather - posted on 05/07/2011

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I have fibromyalgia and epilepsy. I don't know if would call it a disability, but it certainly complicates matters. I'm doing pretty well right now, but I still don't have a lot of energy and I can't drive.

Gemma - posted on 05/07/2011

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just wondering if the care for the toddler causes flareups or more atrophy in one with cp- if so should I be contacting a neurologist or what. i can't stand when my DH attempts to massage me on my shoulder. but the spasms some days are really debilitating causing it difficult to speak.
am wanting to contact my GP while I am able to speak. am high functioning cp but saeems like the stress of being a parent of two under five is catching up to me. did I really underestimate how it would affect me as a mom? I have accomplished so much before having the kids but having the second child is really throwing me for a loop.

Tamie - posted on 09/15/2010

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i was born with a Hip disease and very glad i have a baby that likes to sleep lol the 8 hrs a night in 1 stretch helps ton if i have had a very active day...But have a wonderful husband that helps every min he can

Carolee - posted on 09/14/2010

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I have bi-polar and high anxiety (to the point where it does prohibit me from certain "normal" situations/tasks/daily activities). I also gave birth to my second child 2 months ago (I have a 3-year-old as well).

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Hi there,
I have Fibromyalgia and my 5 year old daughter has ADHD and ODD. My daughter and I pretty much on the opposite ends of each other. lol I always felt really horrible when I wasn't able to take her to the park or be as active. But its extremely hard to do anything when I'm bed-ridden from the pain. It feels like I need a walker just to make it to the washroom.
On days that I do take her to the park, I end up paying for it the next day and usually need to recover.
My mother has MS as well, so don't worry, your not the only one. Your doing the best you can.

Sharon - posted on 09/14/2010

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Hi Susan, I am not disability but my daughter is, she is 31 and has a heart condition, and chronic hypertension that she is on like 6 different medicines for. She has a nine year old son, who has problems with asthma, so she struggles too as some of her meds ahve direct sunlight warnings, and she is tired a lot. She tries to wait untl the sun goes down to plan things, and does a lot of indoor things like game night or movie night, make cookies and treats with the kids, and maybe let them invite friends over for a sleepover, its not all about going outside, its more about having fun, ask the kids what they want to do, you can have pizza party night, wnere they get to make different kinds of pizza etc. These are great low cost things if you are on a budget, like she is.

Erica - posted on 09/14/2010

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Sharlene is right, you have a great reason and you shouldn't feel bad. There are lots of fun activities you can do indoors too :) try board games or something. I really admire those parents who are disabled and still raise great children!

Joan - posted on 09/13/2010

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i have epilepsy with seizures that have never been controlled by med. my seizures cause my short term memory to fail.

Sharlene - posted on 09/13/2010

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Oh my gosh - at least you have a valid reason why you don't take your kids out often! I am trying to make a bigger effort to take my kids out more - so easy just to hang around the house sometimes. I am very slack when it comes to going out. Today I have made a huge effort with my housework - made easy since Tom threw up all over the floor this morning and I didn't have much choice in the matter! I just recently missed out on a job I interviewed for, and I've now decided to stay home a bit longer with the kids and really throw myself into this stay at home thing. I'm going to be better at housework and better at cooking and better at doing interesting things with the kids!

Susan - posted on 09/13/2010

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Thanks, Sharlene. I guess I need to know I am not alone and it is do-able. I have lupus so I have remission & flares. Somedays are just so hard and I feel guilty we do not go 'out to play' or something just as fun! Part of my treatment forbids me from the sun so that makes me feel very bad about my mothering, too!

Sharlene - posted on 09/13/2010

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Hi Susan,
I'm not disabled, however my friend has MS and has just had her first baby about a month ago. I know she is struggling a little with her MS symptoms at the moment, but time will tell how she goes.

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