Divorce

Krystal - posted on 07/29/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I am going thru a very bad divorce and my soon be Ex wants full custody of them he thinks because he has 2 jobs never at home lives with his mother, brother and sister n law and not to even state that they have a 7 month old of their own but Ashley who is also part of the circle of moms feel like she is being used because my ex leaves all the resonabilty up to her and her husband to make sure that My oldest is up and dressed for school and has to make sure she has her homework done and has to watch the youngest all day. What do I do? Do I let him kept them even thought they have stated that they do not want to live their and they hate it their. I mean he does not want to take on the responeablitys but he wants them. WHAT DO I DO?

5 Comments

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Aimee - posted on 07/31/2010

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You fight. I've been there. And it sucks. But as mothers, we have to fight for our children. If we don't, who else will?

Christy - posted on 07/31/2010

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First of all, DO NOT say anything bad on the internet about him or her, they are open records for the court. Be the bigger person and file for custody as well. Keep your head up high and don't bad mouth anyone.

Louise - posted on 07/30/2010

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No way fight girl. Is there a reason he wants full custody! Are you a bad mom I dobt it very much! Your children have said they don't want to be there so go and get them. You want full custody and he can see them at the weekends when he has time to fit them in. Children need time, they need to feel nurtured and if he is always at work where is the nurturing. Money is not the be all and end all of a childs life what they want the most is your time and love. FIGHT!

Casey - posted on 07/29/2010

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I'm so sorry that your going through this it can't be easier on any of you, but seriously do you have to even ask the question "do I let him keep them?" of course you don't, your their mother you need to fight till the death for your children and for their happiness if they were happy and well looked after with you ex and they wanted to stay with him and he could provide a better life for them then you could then yes maybe they should stay with him, but you've just stated that this is not the case so get them back!!! as for his sister in-law she needs to speak up and tell him she can't do this I know she might cop some flack from the rest of the family but she needs to do what is right for herself and for her own child, perhaps she needs to tell your ex that he needs to take care of the children himself or give them back to their mother. Is there any chance of you and your ex sitting down and talking about the childrens future and whats best for them, I know you have said that it was a bad divorce but you both decided to have children together so regardless of whats happened between the two of you you both need to put them first, he may want full custody of them but maybe he doesn't understand that this isn't what the kids want and if he does love them and care about them then he'll at least sit down and discuss them with you, but whatever you do don't bring up anything in the past like the reasons you got divorced or anything like that because it's not about the past or the reasons why it all happened your discussing the future and your children, you really need to try and sort things out with him cause your kids need both of you in their lives and you both need to get along cause you will always be in each others lives weather you like it or not.

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