Do I get a break?

Sharon - posted on 06/09/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I know my husband has to sleep on weekends because he works nightshift, i adjusted to that. But, during the week he has 3 days off and he hardly gives me a break in the morning anymore. The last time I slept in was Mother's day! When do I get a break? I know I just Stay at home, but I can use a break at least once a month? He does help with things around the house and with my 4 yr old when he's home. I love for him to say I'll get Ben you stay in bed this morning? I can only wish? What can you do?

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Kristi - posted on 06/09/2010

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oh and then he goes and buys me a puppy for xmas, not just any puppy but a border collie, the most active hyper dog ever...but will he walk him or do anything with him?? no, wen he pooped on the floor he would step over it and let me know there was a poo on the floor!!.....ill clean that up then shall i!! lol

Kristi - posted on 06/09/2010

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my OH works 6 nights a week, long shifts (he is a baker) but when ever there is a row he starts saying im lazy sit around all day and do nothing, funny how his work clothes are clean, the kids r fed dressed and happy, his meals are cooked but its just the magic fairy that does all this stuff, according to him im lazy!!
now i had a 17month old and a newborn! obviously did all night feeds by myself as he was working, getting up mornings with the kids and doing all the housework and everything that needs doing!
the 1 thing i wont have anyone call me is lazy! im far from lazy, if only he would do a day in my shoes, then we shall see! all i get is...iv come home from work i dont want to do dinner i just want to relax, oh right ok....when do i get to relax???? i dont leave my 'job' its 24/7 but no no no they dont get it!

i dont think men will ever understand it!

good luck getting him to treat u to what u deserve every once in a while!

Chrissie - posted on 06/09/2010

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My husband has told me many times that he isn't a mind reader. You need to tell your husband how you are feeling. I know it sounds silly, but start it off with "I feel" and try to refrain from "you don't" or "you never." It might help to write it out first. I know if I don't know exactly what I want to say, I'll get off-topic or worse, go on and on.
You definitely need a break. You are doing a very hard job with very little (if any) thanks.
Another option is joining a group like MOPS. It was my way of having a little "me" time & it helped a lot when I had problems with my son.

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Yes, husbands think that going to work is harder than staying at home with a baby..... maybe say one day "Right, this is Ben's schedual. I'm going to sleep for a bit longer, then maybe go for a pedi (or whatever else you could do with!). You watch him until I get back." And just leave it at that. When you get home, he'll understand just how hard it can be, especially with the tantrums! And he'll be more suseptible to helping too!

Marcia - posted on 06/09/2010

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Communication is the key to happiness. Men don't take hints, you have to be direct. Tell him ow you feel and what you need and chances are he will find a way to help.

Heather - posted on 06/09/2010

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Have you ever asked him to do that for you? Men are slow sometimes, and it just might not occur to him. My husband does that one morning a week for me, and it's wonderful. =)

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