Does anyone else feel Depressed?

Kathleen - posted on 11/07/2009 ( 17 moms have responded )

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I have a wonderful family. But there are days (and they seem to be getting to be more and more often), that I just want to run away. I've read stories about mother's suffering from PPD and they end up killing their child(ren). The thought horrifies me, and angers me. Then there are days when I start to think "If I hear 'Mom' or 'Honey' one more time I'm going to lose it. I feel more crazy lately than not. Seems like no matter what I do, it's not good enough for someone. Plus I have no friends to talk to when I get super stressed out. No one to just get out of the house with, except my husband, which as much as I love it just isn't the same as a friend on the outside of the harsh reality of life. It sucks. I love being a Mom. But I haven't had a moment to myself in a long while.

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Colleen - posted on 04/18/2013

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oh I can relate to you! I feel exactly the same, I find some days are worse then others, my bad days are really bad I don't do anything don't get dressed just take care of my 1 year old make sure he has his nap and then pick up my older daughter from school and then listen to her yell and scream and whine till bed time. Its exhausting and I feel this pain in the pit of my stomach all the time feel sad, feel as though I only exist to meet other peoples needs. I don't know why but I feel tired with life!

Liz - posted on 11/15/2009

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I totally understand how you feel. I have a couple friends here in town, but my "network" of solid friendships are in Cali. I adore my husband but sometimes you need a girlfriend to vent to or just cry with. I also feel so isolated since i have lived in El Paso. I am so blessed to be a stay at home mom even though it financially it is hard but... I realise they are so little for just a moment and I will gratefully give this time to her( she is my last one) but how can I be 100% when I don't feel it or have it to give?

Alexis - posted on 11/07/2009

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From what you've said, and what I experienced myself, it sounds like you might have a slight case of PPD or "Baby Blues". There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with going in and talking with your doctor about it and finding out what you can take to help make you feel better. If you ever need anyone to chat with (or to have just listen to you), you can email/IM me if you want ... I know we don't know eachother, but sometimes we moms just need to get a load off to feel better! :) Don't worry though, things will start to look better ;) :)

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Colleen - posted on 04/18/2013

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oh I can relate to you! I feel exactly the same, I find some days are worse then others, my bad days are really bad I don't do anything don't get dressed just take care of my 1 year old make sure he has his nap and then pick up my older daughter from school and then listen to her yell and scream and whine till bed time. Its exhausting and I feel this pain in the pit of my stomach all the time feel sad, feel as though I only exist to meet other peoples needs. I don't know why but I feel tired with life!

Petra - posted on 11/15/2009

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I totally understand your dilemma. I get the same way at times. It sounds like you need to find something that you love to do for yourself. I started to take a kickboxing class, and let me tell you...you get rid of tons of frustration and you get in shape at the same time which is a huge morale booster. You might also check around your neighborhood or the area where you live to see if there is a mom's group meeting. A lot of them will be a play group but there is a lot of support because you meet other stay at home moms. That will also give you opportunity to maybe have a mom's night out and go to a movie or just out for dinner with other moms. You need to take some time for yourself, I know it's tough with kids and all the other stuff we have going on. But you need to take care of yourself as well not everybody else.

Hady - posted on 11/15/2009

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Sounds sooo familier its scary.But im w/ all the way about not being able 2 just get away and vent 2 someone going through the same thing and not fill guilty about it.Im a mother of 2 boys and lv it so much but there r times its just 2 much being home 24/7 and not talking 2 any1 but them most of the time.looks like theres a lot of others n ur shoes and have a lot of good advice.Good luck and Never give up.

Elizabeth - posted on 11/13/2009

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I had got deppressed to the point I was forced to go see a doctor and was put on meds. I quit the meds due to some complications, Im not as deppressed as I use to be but I still have times when all I want to do is cry. It is hard when you don't have any friends and never get outside the house. Your husband don't understand b/c even if its only through work he still sees and talks to other people. My kids are in school during the day and sometimes all I do is sleep and pass the day away. And when my youngest was a baby, I had the baby blues. If you feel its bad enough I would seek some help. And try to find something for yourself, even though I haven't yet, I still think its good advice.

Lisa - posted on 11/13/2009

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Some things I found to help me after moving to IL from FL were to keep curtains open and lights on. Along w/ PPD that I suffered the time change hit me as a double whammy. My friend called me out on the PPD and had me go to the dr and along the way I discovered the brighter the rooms the better I felt. The angry-on my last nerve feelings did go away w/ those 2 things. It will get better. Using the CFS lights won't affect your electric bill that bad either.

User - posted on 11/12/2009

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I'm finding out that a lot of sahm feel the same way. There are several reasons, but I think the chief factors are: 1. fatigue and an overwhelming amount of work, 2. (related to 1) lack of sleep, rest or recreation, 3. lack of support. Get support. I feel down many times and feel like I'm going crazy. Many times, I drag myself or run to finish tasks or attend to a need. I was an OCD, confident, self-reliant professional, prior to becoming a sahm. This is not me. This is because of the work involved. I ran numbers on the amount of work that need to be done, the hours needed to perform all the work a sahm needs to do is just insane. It's guaranteed to make anyone go crazy without help. It's inhuman for this society to expect the mom with young children to do everything without any support.

Daisey - posted on 11/12/2009

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You should go see a doctor right away and double check that you don't have PPD. AND you do need to get out of the house and have some time just for you. TRUST me you will feel so much better when you do. Go shopping, go to starbucks and get your favorite beverage, or go out with a friend or even a cousin or aunt someone that you love to hang ou with. It can be someone young or old it dosn't matter you just need to get out of the house. Its not good for you to be in the house all day long. Go get a massage or pedicure even. Hope this is good advice and I hope you do take it. You look very young in this picture. Your a very young mom by the looks of this pic. Good Luck to you and God Bless!

Rachel - posted on 11/12/2009

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Ya I still have it and my son is 14 months old! I've found that some days I just need to just curl up with a book or go on Facebook for even just 1/2 hr and let him play by himself or I'm gonna scream. I also get the thoughts of hurting myself. It's scary but if you talk to your doctor and husband you can get help. I'm still struggling but that's what's helped me most.

Karen - posted on 11/12/2009

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Definitely talk to your husband, and maybe if you both feel it's best then you BOTH can go to the doc's to discuss your options. Also - get some more outside help. Ask around and find out if there are teenage babysitters who can come after school to either help you with housework, or entertain the kids while you take a long shower, or keep the kids while you get out for awhile. Ask at your church to see if anyone can help out (some youth groups will help you out as a service project!). Here we have Early Childhood Alliance that has a list of daycare providers and some have what's called Parents Day out, where it's sort of like a preschool only for very young kids, and you can get a few hours to yourself a couple days a week. Might be pricey, but you can ask for scholarships in certain situations, or ask for the money as a Christmas present!!!! Hang in there!

Lisa - posted on 11/10/2009

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Definately talk to your doctor, especially if you are noticing the PPD more and more frequently. With my last child (4yrs) I developed PPD and my dr. told me it would pass with time. Well it didn't and 2 yrs ago i was diagnosed with clinical depression and have been on a daily anti-depressant since. So please keep a close eye on it.

Kristina - posted on 11/10/2009

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You should talk to your docotr and your husband. Just saying it to someone in person helps ALOT. Then you can take the course of action that your doctor suggests for you. Be patient (with yourself). You must remember you cannot do it all and no one expects you to (except maybe yourself). It will be fine, and you can add me to your circle if you want to talk anytime. But don't put off talking to your doctor and your husband. You'll be so glad you did!

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I had that same problem a little while ago. So what I did was tell my husband that he needed to take the kids out for a few hours or let me go for at least an hour while I went and did what I wanted. I was really losing it, I was getting to the point where I didn't know if I could do this anymore. I love my family, but I needed to get away from them for a little while so that I could cope again. 'Familiarity breeds contempt.' 'Absence makes the heart grow fonder.' Both were correct in my case. When they got back from the park I was happy to see them and I could cope with the whining again for a while until I got to the breaking point again. Again I either went out, or my husband took them somewhere for a while.

Natalie - posted on 11/08/2009

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Yes, lots of moms feel that way. I studied psychology in college, and my final paper was on postpartum depression. The isolation combined with sleep deprivation are thought to be a major source of the rise in postpartum depression. I know it is hard, but your kids and husband will survive if you schedule in time for friends. There is no one way to do it, but we all need the opportunity to compare notes, and occasionally complain to someone who will understand, and not try to "cure" us. If it gets worse, you stop being able to get out of bed, eat, or do activities you used to love, then please see a therapist or doctor. There is no reason to suffer alone with depression or anxiety as a mother. In my case I was just too afraid to admit how bad it was.

TaraLynn - posted on 11/08/2009

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normal, normal, and normal. u r so not alone. if u ever need to crab about anything, add me! i've got plenty to crab about myself! haha

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