Does anyone else feel like a complete outsider at their kids school?

Susan - posted on 06/17/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Reason I'm asking is cus I'm in that position. It feels like almost everyone round the school hates me.I already suffer with depression and this isn't helping at all. I've never done anything to anyone there and they haven't even made an effort to try and get to know me before passing judgement. Worst part is one of the mom's live right next door to me and she and her family decided the first day they met us not to like us, even though they hadn't spoke to me. Anyone have any ideas how to deal with it without confrontation. I'm very shy and hate having to confront people, but don't want to carry on like this.

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Louise - posted on 06/17/2010

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Try and get involved in the school some way. Volunteer in class so the children get to know you. This way when the mums see you coming out of school they will be more inclined to talk to you. then this will also help you learn the childrens names and you could then approach their mums and say oh so and so did really well at the painting (whatever) all you are doing is breaking the ice. Somebody may of said something unplesant and you need to prove them all wrong by showing your good side. I know this works because I was the outsider when we moved to a village and nobody spoke to me. I stood alone at the gates every day. I then volunteered in class and then got a job as lunch time helper at the school. he children then say hello when they come out of school and there is your chance to speak to their parent. Once you have said hello then say hello every time you get eye contact. You will soon be accepted don't worry. I went from Billy no mates to quite popular in six months. xx

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Tiffany - posted on 06/17/2010

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I'm sorry for you that you have to deal with such feelings of animosity. You could either switch your child to another school or you could ignore it and continue with your day and just accept that sometimes people will not like you, for no good reason at all. It happens, but we must persevere and provide a positive example of how to deal with people like this to our children. I'm sure you will do what is best for your family. Keep you head and remember that there are people that do like you very much. Best wishes!

[deleted account]

What is it that they are doing that makes you feel like they don't like you?
How do they respond when you try to get to know them?

Sorry for the barrage of questions, I just don't understand how someone can decide not to like someone without getting to know them--especially an entire school's worth of parents.

I second Louise's idea to volunteer with the class or the PTA.
Is your child friends with anyone else in class? Perhaps you could strike up a conversation with their mom about how well the kids are getting along or invite them for a play date at the park.

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