Does anyone out there have a husband who doesn't understand what a stay at home mom's day consists of? I love my husband dearly, but at times he'll try to rub it in my face about how he works and pay the bills and how I don't do much at all. I personally think he acts like this because he's very inferior about himself. Why is it that people in general think we sit around all day and do nothing?

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Alina - posted on 01/31/2013

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My husband used to be that way. It took him several years to "get it." What happened for my husband is I tried to go back to work part-time when my daughter was ready for school last year. I made a list of everything I would need him to help out with in order to make the transition successful. When my husband saw that list, girl . . . lol, let's just say he doesn't open his mouth to say I don't work hard anymore. He didn't want to have help do all that, and he didn't want to pay anyone to help. He also didn't want to lose his weekends in order for me to work Saturday-Sunday. He also made the mistake of blurting out "all this stuff is like having another full-time job!" I reminded him that I do all of it, and was just asking for help, but he said I don't work as hard has he does . . . he ate his own words. Men are so visual and literal. You may have to do something that will hit him in the face, you know?

Elfrieda - posted on 01/26/2013

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You need to go away for the weekend and leave him with the house and kids. He'll appreciate what you do after that!

My husband and I had a great thing going for 2 years where I worked one day a week and during that time he watched our son and made supper. (he's self-employed, so can be flexible like that) It took care of any lingering doubts about whether I was working hard or not. :)

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Susan - posted on 01/31/2013

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Exactly! I really believe that alot of times men like to be very competitive with women. Who knows, maybe when we multi-task it just looks easy to them? It's funny because when they try to be like us it just doesn't work out. It's ironic how you mentioned about a part- time job because in Dec. 2012 I tried to get one and I had my drug screening and my fingerprints done, but I ended up not getting the job as dietary aide because I arrived a little later for my tb skin test. The manager who interviewed me for the job was super sweet, but then she was comparable to the wicked witch of the west!! Looking back I'm grateful that I didn't get the job because during the day I'm busy with the kids and doing chores around the house. After this happened with my job I almost got my husband didn't say anything more about me working outside of the home. Sometimes they just don't truly appreciate what we do until they're in our shoes!! Thanks for all the lovely advice as it's most appreciated....

Susan - posted on 01/26/2013

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There have been times where he's watched the kids for a couple of hours here and there, but not an all day thing. I honestly think in a way that he knows I do a great job with the kids, but tries to irritate me by saying things of that nature. My baby who is almost 2 1/2 months old had rsv when he was 6 weeks old and they admitted him on New Years Eve and he was able to go home New Years day in the evening. Upon discharge the nurse told me in no certain terms that the only place he can go to right now is to the doctors office. It's almost like his immune system has to start all over because the way they explained it to me was that at 2 mo. of a healthy infant their immune system is starting to get stronger, but when they have rsv it sets them back. Oh, and by the way rsv goes from Nov. until March so the first week of April I'm going to celebrate. My husband and I have been married for 3 years this June, and before he met me he didn't have much responsibility until marriage and our kids.

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