Feels like i dont have a life outside being a mum anymore!

Tess - posted on 11/03/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Hi , well i have a 16 month old daughter and baby due in march, but it feels like im the only one that doesnt get time out. Just to see friends ,to have a night out with the girls or even just convos with pple of same age that arent family. Some of my friends have babies and they always seem to be out and enjoying themselves and im happy for them but i want to have that time too. My daughter stays at her grandparents every now and then but i feel like i have just missed out on too much. Sometimes all i think i can do is be a mum. Iv just turned 21 and love my wee family but i need other pple to talk to! (i get cranky evry now and then cos my fiance gets to go to work and see other adults) please give me alittle advice to to keep me sane or that things be ok!!

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Kelly - posted on 11/04/2009

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I hear ya! Having kids is a full time job! You feel unapreciated overworked. But u have to find time for u or you will go nuts! It seems like you will never have time for you but then u start to appreciate the little breaks more. Maybe your fiance could give u some help in this area?

Lindsey - posted on 11/04/2009

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I feel the exact same way and sometimes I feel quilty for feeling this way because I love my babies and love spending time wth them! I would suggest dinner and movies with frends and even a dance class or zumba or something at a gym. You will meet lots of people and its fun to sweat and it really does release stress! But just remember....we all know how fast our babies grow up and we get to be home and witness every new milestone and some moms dont get that chance so we are lucky :) We will have more time eventually but right now we need to enjoy this time with them!

Katelyn - posted on 11/04/2009

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i know how to feel ... i'm also a young mom i'm 23 with a 3 yr old and a 9 mth old and my husband works full time and gets to have adult conversations all day ... all my friends are still in university and partying ... i feel like i have no one to talk to sometimes either... i actually went to my doctor and was diagnosed with depression... but this circle of moms group has helped a lot giving me a look into other ppl's lives and realize I'm not the only one who is like this.
I also starting going for walks after dinner by myself clearing my head that helps .
you need to get out of the house leave the kids with your partner to do the groceries... go shopping by your self.. also taking the kids to the park in the middle of they day is a good way to meet other moms... even join a gym (if you can find one with a Daycare ) its a good way to meet ppl... hope this helps.. i know what your going through

Cara - posted on 11/04/2009

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Honey I know what you are going through. I'm 22 with three kids 11 months, 21 months (I had both of them in 2008) and a 3 year old. What I've found that works the best is to go out to eat with your friends once a month. Some of your friends probably do go out more than you do, but they spent much less time with their children. It takes a lot to be a mom at our age because a lot of our friend just aren't as good of moms as we are. Just try and think of it this way YOU ARE A GREAT MOM 4 spending so much time with your children. Your kids will thank you for it when they are older and can tell you. I feel for you because I have the same problem. I was at walmart at 11 pm tonite just so I could get out by myself. So I'm spending you happy thoughts. And congrates on the up coming new baby. Just remember that you can only watch them grow up once.

Ashley - posted on 11/03/2009

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You should plan weekly playdates with your friends who have children, you'll be able to have some social time and you wont need to deal with finding babysitters, it may not give you the time away from the little ones but it will help with feeling like you dont get to get out. You can also plan a monthly girls night out where the kids can have "Daddy Time" and you can go out with the girls to dinner or something.

Tiffany - posted on 11/03/2009

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This seems to be so common among us sahm. I have recently joined a scrapbook club that meets twice a month for a few hours. It is not much but it is more time alone then I have gotten in the last 3 years. My advice is to find something you enjoy maybe go out with a friend once a month for lunch. It is hard I don't do anything really outside of the house, but know that you are not alone in this.

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