Going crazy!

CJ - posted on 03/05/2009 ( 7 moms have responded )

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I am currently a stay at home mom of a beautiful 19 month girl and i love her to bits and peices. The last little while i have been feeling different not like myself, i am 4 days late and i have been feeling nausious and tired, and i have been spending most of my time on the toilet. I didnt think anything of it until a couple days ago when it dawned on me that i could be pregnant. I would be happy with another child but i all of the sudden got freaked out and worried about how things are going to go. IF i am pregnant that means i will have 2 children and i dont think i can handle it, i already feel like a maid in my home as is... i couldnt imagine how it would be with another new born. My fiance is no help whatsoever when it comes to anything, any tips or advice i could get the might ease my nerves a little bit would be wonderful....

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Mary - posted on 03/08/2009

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I only have one child so far so I can't offer any advice about what it is like with two small children but I understand obout the no help from your man, LOL



Jamie does nothing around the house....I got so fed up with it I came right out and asked him why he never does anything and he said because I never ask him to.!!!!!  Can you beleive that, lol.  This is what I told him...... "When you get home from work to a nice hot home cooked meal with the family afterwards when you see the sink is full of dishes and you see me running around getting bath time in and story time in and the bed time snack ready you should be doing the damn dishes!  I shouldn't have to ask you to."



He didn't take the advice so I just started asking him to do things....some times I feel like I have a 7 month old and a 16 year old.

Trisha - posted on 03/07/2009

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My two girls are 14 months apart-23 and 9 months. While it was a bit rough in the beginning, everything worked out in no time. I think the similarity in age has made them be closer together, too.

Trish

Ashley - posted on 03/07/2009

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That is a great poem... and is exactly how I feel.



A new baby is overwhelming but it also helps complete a family. I know I can't wait to have to next.



As for your fiance, you gotta say something. I don't think men truly comprehend how much we put into a day. My husband didn't until lost it. I mean I broke down. He always thought I was loving my life (which I do) I had to explain that even though I love my new mommy role, I am still a person and need space and time to be "me".



Good Luck



Ashley

[deleted account]

Quoting Marta:



It is very overwhelming! I have a 2 1/2 and a soon to be 6 month old. It feels like I am constantly cleaning my house! But someone recently gave me a framed poam:






Excuse This House






Some houses try to hide the fact






that children shelter there,






Ours boasts of it quite openly






the signs are everwhere.






For smears are on the windows






little smidges on the door






I should apologize I guess






for the toys strewn on the floor.






But I sat down with the children






and we laughed and played and read






And if the doorknob doesn't shine,






their eyes will shine instead.






For when at times I'm forced to choose






the one job or the other






I'd like to be a good house-keeper






but first I'll be a mother.






If you are pregnant with your second-congratulations!! Spend the next 9 months spoiling your first. Everything will fall into place. If anyone offers to help, take them up on it.



 



 



I absolutely LOVE this poem!!  Do you know who wrote it?  Or where I could get a framed copy too????    I choose every day to read and play with my twin toddlers, and love every minute of it.  Nap time or after they go to bed at night is when I tidy the house. 



To C.J. ~ as the other moms have said, everything will fall into place.  Men are pretty thick sometimes, I always have to ask my husband to help and if I don't, he assumes I have it all under control.  You will be great!!





 

Marta - posted on 03/05/2009

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It is very overwhelming! I have a 2 1/2 and a soon to be 6 month old. It feels like I am constantly cleaning my house! But someone recently gave me a framed poam:



Excuse This House



Some houses try to hide the fact



that children shelter there,



Ours boasts of it quite openly



the signs are everwhere.



For smears are on the windows



little smidges on the door



I should apologize I guess



for the toys strewn on the floor.



But I sat down with the children



and we laughed and played and read



And if the doorknob doesn't shine,



their eyes will shine instead.



For when at times I'm forced to choose



the one job or the other



I'd like to be a good house-keeper



but first I'll be a mother.



If you are pregnant with your second-congratulations!! Spend the next 9 months spoiling your first. Everything will fall into place. If anyone offers to help, take them up on it.

Tara - posted on 03/05/2009

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I can totally understand how you feel. First thing I would do is find out for sure if you are pregnant, but try not to worry about it until you confirm yes or no.  I felt much the same way as you have been in early February and did take a pregnancy test, just in case. I am expecting my second child in September (my daughter will be one on March 22nd). To be honest my first words when I saw the little plus sign were "Oh F*(&", and then I started to cry. I've gotten over that part and am now looking forward to the new baby.  Things do get better, really :D



As for your fiance not helping, I would lay it on the line to him - if you need help, ask for it. My husband didn't understand how stressed I was getting until I finally snapped at him, and now he watches our daughter so I can get things done, or get some sleep, or even read for a few minutes.  Once you get into a routine, things get much better, and, if you are pregnant, by the time you have the new baby, your daughter will be old enough to "help" a lot and that will help things out too.



As for the worry part, I think everyone worries like that at some point. I actually have a fridge magnet that says "I worry about things I can do nothing about  - It's my hobby!" and honestly, some days that is exactly how I am. The best thing to do for yourself is to do something that completely takes your mind off it. The less stress you have now, the better.

Jessica - posted on 03/05/2009

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Don't worry, you will do fine. I had the same feelings when I went from 1 to 2 kids. I was even afraid that I couldn't love them both the same, but everything falls into place, you'll see. My kids were less than 2 years apart and it helped if I let my son feel like he was helping take care of the baby with me. As far as taking care of the house goes, just take care of the kids and get to the housework when you get to it. As soon as you get into a routine you will be able to do it all. Good Luck and congratulations!

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