GRANDPARENTS NEVER MAKE AN EFFORT

Carly - posted on 01/12/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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i have a 15month old little girl and my husbands parents hardly bother with her we have to drive the 20+miles to get them to see her but they never phone to see how she is or ask if the can pop in as they get the bus to my bro-in-laws house which isnt far from our house they have no kids. my daughter is there only granchild and when we do see them at their house they play with her and everything. but im finding it really hard because they are telling people that they are always seeing her which is a lie. my husband wont say anything to them.

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Carly - posted on 01/17/2012

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i have tried inviting them over for dinner but the just make an excuse like they need to go shopping we have even took them shopping but the make up another reason not to bother. they arent that elderly but my husbands mother still works.

S. - posted on 01/12/2012

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My mam and dad don't really bother with my kids although they think and make out that there fab grandparents and i honestly think they belive this, they are both 57 never visit my house but moan if I don't go round for a while, I left my baby of 1 years there for 30 mins whilst I took my 3year old to doctors and Cos my baby cryed at her my mum couldn't wait to see the back of us, my oldest nephew is 19 and they were a little better when he was a baby but only because I was living at home to take care of him, my oldest is nearly 13 and I must say it hurt at first my mam would say how she's "past babies" now she's older! I now know that it her loss my kids are great and she won't have built up the relationship for when there

Kay - posted on 01/12/2012

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Sorry, I know it hurts when the grandparents are close by and don't come to your house.That is a big negative. They take a bus...are they elderly or handicapped in some way? The positive is that when you visit them, they play with their granddaughter. Grandparents come in all shapes and sizes as do parents. Some just take naturally to it to the benefit of all. You really don't know what kind of interaction there will be until the grandkids start arriving. I believe in the power of positive thinking the good thing is that when you go to their home, they play with your daughter. That is good for her and for them and as this has a real potential to grow as your daughter get a little older. Try to invite them to your home for a reason...for dinner,to play cards , watch a game etc. If that works, then that is another step. It is hard to understand why they don't come over when they are close by but at least they aren't there ball the time interfering with you parenting all the time...another kind of problem! There is an art to being a good grandparent, just like there is to being a good parent.

! Your expectations for them are very reasonable...you are not asking them to be full time babysitters! But take the high road and see where it leads you.

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