Having issues putting my 8 month down at night.

Erin - posted on 12/17/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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For the past week, I've been having problems putting my daughter down at night, she'll be tired and nurse and seem like she goes to sleep, but 5 minutes after I lay her down in the crib she's up and screaming. So I'll take her out and rock her and maybe try and nurse again but now she's awake and won't go back to sleep! So I've tried putting her in the crib and letting her "cry it out." I've let her cry it out for various amounts of time. But I've never left her in there longer than 30-45 minutes and I refuse to let her cry herself to sleep. That is not an option for me. A couple of times my husband has gotten up and been able to put her to sleep and I've succeeded in putting her to sleep only after much hard work and frustrating moments. Any suggestions?

P.S. - She doesn't nap in the late afternoon, I don't give her juice in the late afternoon either.

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Renae - posted on 12/17/2009

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I'm quite sure that the problem comes from your baby not knowing how to go to sleep on her own. The behaviour you are describing is very common.

To teach her to go to sleep (which will have the wonderful effect of her also sleeping for longer periods) you have several options. No-cry methods and crying methods. Crying methods are most effective, have higher success rates and work quickly. No cry methods are gentle and require some time and patience.

I will back off on the crying methods because you have made your feelings clear. Just know that if you get desperate, it is possible to learn how to interpret your babies cries so that you know whether she is getting distressed. Once they learn this, most people change their minds about crying methods as it becomes not nearly as bad as you previously thought. I am living proof. Contact me if you want more info. I am NOT an advocate of control crying and the method I advocate is very different.

The most common no-cry option used by behaviourists (sleep consultants) is gradual withdrawal. This is where you gradually withdraw the baby from needing your help to go to sleep. This has an 80% success rate and takes 2-4 weeks.

Another no-cry method is that of UK baby whisperer Tracey Hogg, called Pick-up/Put-down. She has a website with a support forum for people using the method.

Lots of info out there if you google these or you are welcome to contact me for instructions (too long to include in this post).

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