Heavy Heart needing support

Kristina - posted on 02/22/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I need som support, I am on the verge of my Daughters 1st Birthday. Ordinarily, after having 2 boys already I should be usto the emotional rollercoaster of the first birthday. This time it is so different. I am not having anymore kids, and I feel so empty, and usless. My body will no longer be bringing any children into the world. I feel like a time in my life is gone. Is there anyone that has any advice on how to overcome this???

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Jamie - posted on 02/24/2010

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Due to cancer, I just had a hysterectomy so I had the choice taken away from me! Part of me is very sad, but the other part is enjoying my son so much that I don't really think about it too much. Like the others said, just think about how much you can look forward to the things you can do know, that you wouldn't be able to do with another small one! Road trips, leaving the house without everything the baby owns being packed!

User - posted on 02/24/2010

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Hi, I had my tubes tied too when my little one was 1 or 2 and I went through the same thing. They are now 13 and 7 and I hate the thought that I am not having anymore children. However, I try to do what Cassie said and enjoy every minute w/my kids. Now they are both in school full time so I try to volunteer as much as possible and I got my self a part time job so I can be w/them. I wish you the best of luck and hope you keep us posted on what your doc says. I would love to know the advice you get.

Kristina - posted on 02/24/2010

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Thank you all for your kind words, I am actually going to talk to my doc today about wha is going on. I feel so heavy hearted, its weighing on me way too much. Need to be more checked in for my kids. Thanks again, its so nice to have people to give me advice when I REALLY need it!

Kristi - posted on 02/22/2010

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I know that at times, I feel like my Little Man is growing up too quickly too. But when I start to get sad, I think about what it will be like when I can really have conversations with him and how much fun we'll have when he's older. That usually pulls me right out of it. Also, if you find that everything else you have tried just doesn't work, don't take any shame in looking into a counselor of some sort. It just may help!

Teela - posted on 02/22/2010

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I went through this when I had my tubes tied. It was a grieving process(to know that you'll never have anymore kids). I tried to focus on my kids and the feeling did pass. If after a while you still feel this way you might want to mention this to your doc (could be depression). Good Luck!

[deleted account]

I can't give any advice because I am going through the same thing. I am trying to convince my husband to have a third baby because my littlest just turned three, and I don't think I can stand this being the end of babies for me. I am beginning to think I may have to have a sort of mourning period to get over this. Does that make sense? It is the end of a beautiful part of life. Even though it is the beginning of new things, it is still hard to accept. I hope you feel better soon.

Cassie - posted on 02/22/2010

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just think of it as now you can injoy the time with your 3 kids instead of having to focus on just one smaller child... maybe you'll be able to do more now that 1 your not pregnant or 2 there isn't a smaller baby that needs more attention. you may be able to focus on the three of them better now (not saying you couldn't before but maybe it will be easier)

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