Help! I can't stand the attitude when he gets ready for school!

Jennifer - posted on 03/14/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My oldest child is 9 and is in the third grade. He used to love going to school, but this year it has become very difficult. He has always struggled with reading majorly, and of course the rest of the subjects have suffered because of it. He has been getting special help since kindergarten, and he goes to a very small (about 120 students total for grades k-5) school, and I love all the teachers. Even though I questioned it long ago, I had him tested this year for ADD, and his doc started him on meds for it. I have seen a huge improvement in his ability to concentrate on his work, but he still struggles with reading. His attitude this entire year has been really bad (before he was on the meds and after, so it isn't caused by the meds). Every morning, he doesn't want to get out of bed, he tells me how much he hates school, and he throws major fits non stop until he is on the bus. I do have to admit that a lot of times I loose my cool, because I don't know what to do. He slams doors and punches things. He hollars at his brother and sisters, and is very rude and disrespectful to me. Today I tried to talk to him, and he told me noone will play with him at school. He said he is bored at recess, because noone will incude him in any of their games. I tried to expain to him that his attitude has been really bad, and they probably don't want to play with him with that kind of attitude. He told me he doesn't have that kind of attitude at school, but I don't know. His teachers have always told me that he is a very good kid and that he gets along with others just fine, but I haven't talked to them for a while (have a conference this Friday) My husband and I have always talked about home schooling. It has always been an open option to our kids, and so far they have chose public school. I said something to him again this morning that we are so close to the end of the year, but if he wanted next year to be home schooled, it was an option. He then complained that he didn't want to stay home all the time. I'm just so lost on what to do. I don't want to keep sending him to school if it is so stressful for him because he doesn't have anyone to play with, because I want him to be able to concentrate on learning. But, at the same time, I don't want to force him to stay home and be home schooled if he doesn't want to be.

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Jennifer - posted on 04/05/2013

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Sarah has great ideas. Do you have a dog? They can make great reading buddies for practice.
You may want to give your pediatrician a call too. It sounds like he may be at risk for depression. The doc would know what to look for and how to best approach it. It's so hard to see our kids go through troubles at school. Hang in there Mom!

Sarah - posted on 03/14/2013

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I would talk with the teachers and see what they say on the social end of things. I know my daughter would say no one played with her and then as we talked about school I would find out that there were lots of people that actually did play with her throughout the day.

For the reading have you thought about getting outside help like a tutor or a learning center? I have a son that struggled some with reading. I think sometimes I tried to push too hard which then made it even harder for him. If you could get someone that could keep learning fun and do it untraditionally. So instead of sitting down at the table and reading it is playing basketball as you spell or learn vocab or even your nouns, pronouns, etc. Then for the reading part do some of the reading by books on tape or acting funny stories out doing them with different voices and even outfits. Him reading needs to still be there, but sometimes changing it up and listening to someone else read or reading in a different fashion helps to make things click.

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