Help Please!!!!!!!!!!

Marie - posted on 01/22/2009 ( 27 moms have responded )

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I can't seem to do anything right. I am always so exhausted after taking care of my 2 yr old lil boy all day long that I don't have any energy to do anything else. I feel like I'm lazy, but I just can't seem to do anything. Please give me some advice on what will help me get my energy back.

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Donna - posted on 01/22/2009

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a few questions...Kind of weird but go with it for a moment...Do you poop everyday?  If your responce is no then that could be a problem.  When you have toxins in your body and they are not secreted, then you body will become lathargic. and you wll be tired all the time.  Also it is the food you are  eating that can make you tired.  And do you exercise?  If you start to exercise then you will find that after the first week you will start to have energy.  I say the 1st week cause your body will be tired from not used to exercising.  Or is the real problem is that you are depressed?  That could cause it too.  Write a journal and in that journal write down the times of day you are tired.   The events that r making u tired.  Then after a week go back and look and see if you see a patteren in your daily activities.  Then you can work on the change.  There could be lots of possibilities when I don't know you

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Rebekah - posted on 01/16/2013

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Do the chores with your wee boy and teach him what you are doing - it will keep him occupied and help you get stuff done - plus then it's fun because watching him learn will make you feel positive about what you are doing.. and he might help :) - sometime you go through patches of just feeling unmotivated but they don't last forever - try and remember that when your feeling that way - maybe also look up some foods that give you more energy and are healthy - and yes exersize does help but if your like me (an anti exersizer) I just found that by not turning t.v on until after lunch gets you lots more motivated - and focussed too - no distractions - :) haha

Jacque - posted on 01/27/2009

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Marie, After reading your post I had to reply to you. I am an older mom I am 46 and my son is almost 6. I love being a mom in fact it is the best thing in my life and I love it!!! BUT>>>> you do get tired running around doing all those mom duites. I eat "healthy" chocolate. No seriously. I was cleansing to lose weight (I lost 12 lbs in 9 days) and this company came out with a chocolate a year ago that has not only helped me and everyone I know cleansing have an easier time doing it but we ll get to eat this chocolate now without the guilt! It is not like any other chocolate. It is organic and is packed with amino acids so it fights off hunger..It curbs the appetite a bit and also has vitamins and minerals that we all need. It boots your seratonin in 10 minutes so you feel instant energy and you are in a great mood. It is about 30 calories and only has 3 grams of raw, pure cane sugar.No waxes, no chemicals at all! It is not even radiated which most all dark chocolate is to kill the bacteria (I've done my research). Anyway, I have 2 in the am - you let them melt in your mouth so it goes right to the brain through the glands in the mouth and Bam! You feel energy and are buzzing around. I even lost 3 pounds in a week the first week (a year ago) that i started eating it. I have a blast telling others about it - after all it's chocolate and most women (and men) love chocolate! Email me or post if you want a more personal conversation or info. My email is www.cleanbody@comcast.net. Blessings to you and good luck. Love Jacque

Karrie - posted on 01/27/2009

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not sure if anyone suggested this yet, but you might want to go to your doctor and get your Thyroid checked...it can cause major exhaustion too

Jeana - posted on 01/27/2009

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I have four kids 14,11,8,7 I know how you feel. Seems like all your doing is chasing kids around and cleaning. Have to say im one of those people who clean all the time feel like if the house is not clean it's the end of the world and what will people think. I have learned I need to tell myself that it's ok if things are not done all the time. That its ok to just say today im doing nothing but what I have to feed change baby whatever. The rest can wait. Second do you feel depressed? I know I didn't realize I was really depressed just thought it was a little and I could deal with it. One day I talked to the doctor and he gave me some meds to take WOW what a difference. Now I just take them as needed on days where life just seems to crazy. Something to think about. Oh and call a friend talk to big people its wonderful to spend your day with the little ones but sometimes you just need to have someone to talk to. In the morning get up dressed dont sit around in sweat pants and t shirt all morning put make up on and do your hair. It just makes you feel better about your self. Well hope this helps.

Rachel - posted on 01/27/2009

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I started my own Pampered Chef business. It has been a great way to get out of the house once in a while. Missing being home really helps. The training has helped and forces me to be a little more organized - that helps a lot too. Just doing something new and fresh revitalizes me a bit. Also being something than my husbands wife or my babies mother - it has been another identity for me. I find that motivating as well. I've also learned new fun - and yummy recipes that I actually enjoy cooking. Having fun with "chores" helps.



I've also purchased a used treadmill on craigslist. I try to get on it even for a few minutes a day. My 2 year old has been terrible with his naps but I do what I can. I also have stocked up on caffeinated tea which doesn't seam to bad on my tummy. I also noticed some have antioxidants in it so that is good. By the time I drink it it's cold of course but hey.



I also remember to give myself a dose of the gummy vitamins and vitamin C as I'm dishing them out to my other 4 kids.



For more information on starting your own Pampered Chef business - or other ideas I shared please feel free to email me at donatskitchen@gmail.com

Rachel

Tracie - posted on 01/27/2009

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i feel like that when i haven't had time to get away from the kids and the house, i talked to my husband about it, and now we started a monthly girls night. he stays home with the boys one friday night or saturday night a month, and allows me a few hours outside of the home, time to be with other adults. and usually my sister, and a few others go and hang out, have dinner things like that.

Alison - posted on 01/27/2009

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SEE YOUR DOCTOR about all of the possible problems already mentioned in these other posts! I'm betting on depression and dietary deficiency. Some good vitamins including the Bs would help us all, but I bet you could use a little more right now.

Sarah - posted on 01/27/2009

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I remember talking to my great aunt a few months ago about feeling exaclty the same way and this is what she said to me:

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo

The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren’t his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

Babies Don’t Keep
by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton

Catherine - posted on 01/26/2009

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You sound exactly the same as i felt. Have you considered whether you are low in iron. For ages I thought I was just really lazy and just couldn't seem to get on top of anything and everything was an effort. My doctor ran some blood tests and found that my iron levels are lower then normal. I take an iron tablet every day now and feel heaps better! I also find taking a vitamin C tablet with it helps. My doctor also says eating lots of green leafy veges help too. Good Luck!

User - posted on 01/26/2009

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The only way I know to keep my energy up is to eat healthy and work out. Eating healthy meaning whole grain products early in the day and protien packed food....nuts...peanut butter....apples..high energy food.....keeps your body full of energy. Working out is good for energy and a great stress release. At first when I started working out I was even more tired, but then I started to have more energy the more I worked out.  It is hard at first, but start slowly and work your way up! I looked on the inter net for high energy foods and ways to keep my energy level up. Different kinds of food do make a difference in energy levels.  It will get better!!

Marie - posted on 01/26/2009

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I really appreciate everyone's advice.  I have talked to my husband about the way i feel and he is helping me out.  My mother-in-law is also helping a lot.  She comes and picks up my son twice a week which gives me and my husband time alone where I can relax and just watch a movie.  Things are becoming a lot more easy for me. Again thanks to everyone.

Tiffany - posted on 01/26/2009

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I know as stay at home moms we often feel that we are failing if we can't keep the house spotless, meals ready, etc. But you have to remind yourself that being a stay at home mom is a JOB. One that doesn't pay, usually 24 hours on the clock & no sick leave. It is especially hard to get everything done when you are caring for a toddler. I drove myself into exhaustion trying to keep everything perfect until one of my friends finally got through to me that our own eyes see things way worse than others do. The house that looked filthy to me just looked like a home to her. The list I had only gotten 3 things checked off of felt like failure to me but to someone else they noticed what I had gotten done in between all the other things that I had done that were too important to need to be wrote down like meeting the needs of my child, reading to her, playing with her. So as far as these things go realize it doesn't all have to be done in a day. There are some things that CAN be put off til tomorrow.



Another thing to look at is are you feeling depressed, because that can cause you to feel this way also & can really zap your energy. I would keep a day to day journal of what goes on & how you feel. See if you notice a pattern or if there are certain times in the day that you feel this way. And make sure you are taking care of your health.



Good luck to you-things will get better & if you need some help don't feel bad for asking for it. Sometimes getting a sitter & having some time to yourself can do a world of good.

Stella - posted on 01/26/2009

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You are not lazy! I gave up work when my 1st son was born and the first 26mths were tough, but nothing compared to "the terrible twos". I think a combination of all the advice given is best to see what works for you. Try the easy things first, eat properly and regularly- no food, no energy! Nap if and when he does- the guilt you feel over not doing the dishes is replaced when you wake up feeling more able to cope with what's most important- your child. Also, is any kind of childcare/nursery an option. We put our son in for 2x 2.5hr sessions a week when he got to two and this made such a difference. He was happier, I got "me" time to excercise/sleep/chill/do housework, whatever I needed. They're so hard to entertain at this stage because of their short attention span at the moment- you've just got all the paints set out and they want to go out to play. I'm so pleased you're trying to help yourself too because I found that the more tired I was (am!) the more unnecessarily harsh or snappy I am with him, which just makes us both feel bad. Good luck, and don't be too hard on yourself xxx

Tabitha - posted on 01/26/2009

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I have a 3 week old daughter at home with me full time and my 9 year old step son is with us on the weekends. My husband noticed how off I have been for the past week. I get random patches through-out the day where I am so sad.



What helps me is talking to him, he knows that making me laugh get's me out of that slump. He just listens and try's to get me to explain how I feel even though most of the time I can't. Our husbands are a wonderful tool if we can learn to use it.



Also I have 2 dogs so just going outside with them when I let them out helps me feel better. I personally enjoy doing housework so I try to do the dishes or the laundry when I am feeling down. Maybe take your son for a walk every day, that will help you get out of the house.



Make sure you are taking multi vitamin's with iron in it, maybe try taking vitamin d as well. I am not sure where you are located but I am in Canada and we don't get much vitamin d during the winter months.



I hope that helps, good luck

[deleted account]

Do you have a support system? I have found a small group of moms that are there to really help me work out these things together. We can watch each others kids so we can get things done. We do activities together and go on outings together. We take turns with each others grocery lists and sometimes we just listen. It has been the single most important "change" to get me out of that place you are describing. We cannot do it all alone

Tayo - posted on 01/26/2009

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Another thing that could cause you to have low energy is low iron levels. But basically my best advice is see your doctor. Because it could be any number of things and blood work is the best way to find out.

Jennifer - posted on 01/26/2009

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Don't feel bad.I think every stay at home mom feels like that.I know I do.Kids are a hand full and if your son has half the energy that my daughter does then I know you have got to be worn out.First you need to start by trying to make your bedtime close to his.The more rested you are the better you feel.

Jeni - posted on 01/26/2009

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I have a 6month old son and i am always exhausted... try falling asleep when he is asleep that sometimes works for me

Shelley - posted on 01/26/2009

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Quoting Marie:

Help Please!!!!!!!!!!

I can't seem to do anything right. I am always so exhausted after taking care of my 2 yr old lil boy all day long that I don't have any energy to do anything else. I feel like I'm lazy, but I just can't seem to do anything. Please give me some advice on what will help me get my energy back.



ohhh nooo,i can try and give u advice if u want??

Leonie - posted on 01/26/2009

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take some time out for yourself once a week or so, it may be something as small as having a bath and doing the pampering thing like a face mask or read a book, you can do it after your baby goes to bed if you havent got anyone else....    once a month i go to a coffe shop when the kids are at a friends house, i have a coffee, take my time and read the trashy mags that they provide, it only costs  about 5 dollars, it has helped me recover from my depression and makes you feel like a human in the REAL WORLD again!!!

Crystal - posted on 01/26/2009

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In addition to exercise, montioring my diet (I would go over half the day before I realized I hadn't eaten anything yet) and drinking more water!!! I had to ask my hubby to find something everyday when he comes home from work that I did, and comment on it. Even if it's like, hey you got a load of laundry done. Thank you. Or a thanks for making supper. It was amazing how much better I felt just knowing that he actually does notice some of the stuff I do. When he notices, I want to do more, and find the energy to do it more easily. Our sex lift got better too...

Sarah - posted on 01/23/2009

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I also read that if you are low in iron, which women often are, then you will be lacking in energy. Just a thought. Good luck, and if you are taking care of your 2 year old little boy, then that in itself is doing something right. Don't be so hard on yourself. I feel more negative and depressed when I am tired too. I know how you feel. Just by asking for help, you are doing something right. So there you go, two things you are doing right. Have a good day!!

[deleted account]

I know exactly how you feel.  I do manage to mostly keep the house clean, but I am tired as soon as I get up in the morning.  I've never been able to catch up ever since I was pregnant with my daughter.  I just feel behind in everything.  I like to make lists of the things I need to get done.  It may take me a long time to mark everything off, but atleast I have something to look at and once I start marking things off it feels good.  My daughter has never napped and it is hard to do a lot of things while caring for her (like cleaning the bathroom, so I have to wait until the weekend to do a lot of things.  I'd rather clean the bathroom or put away the laundry during the week but it just isn't possible.  I hope you feel better soon.  My daughter is also 2 and it is a hard age.  Two seems like a demanding age.

Amy - posted on 01/23/2009

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I felt the same way for a long time.  I notice if I try to do some kind of exercise in the morning, even just a stretching video, anything to make my body aware it is awake, I feel 100% better.  Hope you find something, I know it sucks feeling like that!

Cheryl - posted on 01/22/2009

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Donna that is really good advise. I find myself tired and cranky alot too. It seems pretty common in stay at home mamas. When you put too much presure on youself to be the perfect mom, wife, homekeeper, you can make yourself go crazy. Talk to you man. Ask for some help. Take time for just you. Oh, and start you day with a smile and fiber.

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