Help with a 5 year old.

Morgan - posted on 02/24/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )




My 5 year old crys about everything! and he barley eats dinner. I grund him to his room but he does not care. He will tell me hours befor dinner that he doesn't want it and he's not going to eat it. He always has this whiney voice about him and it really is to much for me to handle. Any one have any advice? I don't know what to do anymore. Nothing effects him if I tell him he's grounded he says only today right. If I tell him to eat he tells me I'm gonna be grounded. HELP!!


Christine - posted on 02/24/2009




I suggest taking a more positive approach with him.  My daughter was IMPOSSIBLE at the dinner table.  Now she's 8 and will eat anything I put in front of her whether she likes it or not.  First, you have to give him a goal.  Start small or it won't have any effect.  Since I don't know your son, I can only brainstorm, but I'm sure he likes to eat SOMETHING... perhaps starting on an everyother night basis, her can choose his meal if he eats the meal you set down on the alternate nights, or if he really has an activity he enjoys that he doesn't get a lot, you can use it as an incentive for after dinner... IF it works, you can extend the time between gratification.  Now my daughter was awful to the point where we thought that if we just sat her at the table until it was gone she would eat- NOPE she found ways- she even went as far as to flush her food down the toilet!!! Smart little boogers.  Punishment is obviously not working, so you have to find a way to make eating apositive experience.  Maybe he can help prepare the food so he gets to eat something he made all his self (with mom's help of course)...that was my biggest success.  A doc would probably tell you that so long as he's growing properly and not losing weight that it's ok and not to push the food, but we as mothers obviously feel the importance of sitting down at the table and teaching proper eating habits.  The truth is that some kids are just better eaters than others, and the better we understand that, the easier it becomes to handle.  Your particular situation sounds as if the behavior is taking more of a toll on you than the eating itself... i would just try to do your best to stay positive and enforce positive behaviors in your son...  if the eating bothers you, you can try what i've suggested, if it's truley more the behaviors, you might benefit from teaching him an appropriate way to refuse his meal- like saying no thankyou.  Or making the rule that he must take one bite of everything that is prepared before being excused appropriately from the table.  I would not entertain the conversation of dinner before you're seated to eat either... that's just egging him on.  You need to teach him, not punish...


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Laurie - posted on 02/24/2009




I completely agree with Christine Martin. I had a very picky eater. He's 12. I never did anything and now it seems I have to start over. He needs the vitamins for his development. He always responded better to positive reinforcement. Kids get so much negative all the time. Positive is more fun. Stickers and a reward system might help. As far as the whinyness goes, I always pretend not to hear my five year old. He thinks it's funny and forgets why he's whining because he's laughing so hard.

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