Hey sahms do you ever feel like you need to do something outside of home?

Kenneka - posted on 12/08/2011 ( 7 moms have responded )




Lately, I have been feeling a lot of self-inflicted pressure. I am home all day, everyday and I am really feeling like I need to work or something more productive than being here. I care for my baby, who is almost one, but still, my life is wasting away (at least that is how it feels). Has anyone ever felt the same way? I don't know what I want to do career wise. I have been in and out of school, only being able to finish CNA but I never found work, so the license expired months ago. I feel like I have to do something, even though we make it work with me being home and hubby working. I can't shake the feeling that it may not work out in my marriage or something tragic can happen (Lord forbids) and I will need to work to take care of me and my baby.....but with what career?! I have been out of work for about three years and I am not marketable as an employee. I would like to go back to school, but I can't even decide on a field to study. I am the MOST unambitious person I know! HELP!!


Kay - posted on 12/16/2011




I can give you the gift of perspective...I have made homemaking my lifetime career with 39 years experience! You are blessed to be able to make it at home because your husband is supportive. Hey, it is a great job if you can get it. There are great opportunities as stay at home Mom. As for wasting your life away...we all seek fulfillment. Over the years, there were many times I was so fulfilled that I that I thought I might explode..in a good way! Money is always an issue when you stay home unless you are well off. This is not helped my many of our sister Moms working which make 2 incomes the norm and thus raising the prices for everyone . Oh well, back to the topic. You are looking to the future. Please don' t worry about the future...none of us know what bridges we will have to cross. The thing about being happy at home is that you have to put your whole heart and soul into it. Many women today are conflicted. Everything has to be on the fast track .Your precious daughters is 1. Your life is changing daily as she grows. Every job has drudgery! You are the boss! I made my own schedule.Each day you are moving toward your values and goals as a family...You are a unique person..give it your best and see where you go! A Mom has so many jobs that if you are bored, go to the next one. You arrange your day. A MOM /HOMEMAKER is a teacher,nurse,cook,housecleaner,laundry mat,shopper,home economist(saving,saving) and many other things. Your time give you an advantage in all of these areas. Reducing the stress in the family is the biggest benefit.Start by giving your family your time, if you have time left over, give some to your neighbors and your church,then if you still have time left over, to your community and globally. Be carefully, time is precious and your family comes first. Gosh, you can tell I am passionate about this! This has been my life's work and still is..I have 5 grandchildren 10 and under! We need more Moms I the front lines as we are becoming an endangered species! May you receive all of life's blessings!

[deleted account]

I feel very much like that if I don't get out and do things.
I used volunteer work to find my direction--it looks fabulous on a resume, even if it has nothing to do with the field you ultimately decide on, it allows you to network and keeps basic job skills polished, and it allows you to tryout lots of different positions without spending thousands on tuition. Plus, it can give you the same fulfillment and satisfaction a job would (unless you are looking for a paycheck), but it is way more flexible family-wise than a regular job.

First, you need to figure out what it is about working outside the home that you miss. What would make you feel accomplished and happy?

There are literally hundreds of different areas you can volunteer in:
Advertising, if you have a back ground in art, PR, or design of any kind, you can work with charitable organizations on ad campaignes.
Fundraising, do you love to plan parties? help organize a gala, dinner, or festival to raise $$.
You said you completed you CNA training. Perhaps you would like to work on the front lines with the actual benefitees? You could deliver Meals-on-wheels (you can bring your baby with you!) Visit nursing homes to read and help with physical and occupational therapy (kids are also welcome there in most cases). You can also volunteer basic services to your local homeless shelter tutoring on personal care and basic, preventative healthcare they can do to keep themselves healthy.
I can go on and on if you need ideas.

I teach Art Therapy classes to unstable youths in my area. I also help to organize the Walk for the Homeless which benefits the homeless shelters in our area. My family, a few friends, and I organize a Christmas party each year for the citizens of the local nursing home--we make ornaments, tell stories, and decorate the tree. And of course their is the basic school volunteering, but you won't start that until your little one is older.

Chris - posted on 12/08/2011




I think we all feel like that sometime or other. I've been a SAHM since my 2nd child was born... 10 years ago! I've felt worthless and trapped, helpful and wanted, stupid and lazy, just a mixture of everything over the years. My salvation was finding a hobby. I love to sew, so I started making things for my kids. I didn't sell anything, but I could have if I wanted to make a little money. I also found a little job, working retail, for 2-6 hours a week. It isn't much, but it will buy dinner out for the 6 of us on payday Friday. I feel guilty leaving my youngest in daycare while I'm working, but I look at it this way... he gets to play with other kids, and I get some "adult time." Even if my adult time doesn't last that long.

HUGS to you! Stay positive, and know you aren't alone!!


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Amanda - posted on 12/17/2011




As someone else said, have you thought about volunteering somewhere? I want to look into this as well for myself.

Niki - posted on 12/15/2011




I have a great job you can do from home. It is super, easy, fun, and has high earning potential. $500month, $1000/month, $5000/month on up. I can't post details on this blog, but you can email me if you want. nikikostrova@wedeliverwellness.com. Super easy, and part-time...

Tamyra - posted on 12/08/2011




I have been through the same feelings. I use to teach preschool at a Christian school. I have been home since my pregnancy and my little one is almost 2. Sometimes I see my husband working so hard to pay everything or I feel I need to help. My husband never makes me feel bad. He says I have the most important job. I feel lucky that I can be home with her, not many Moms can. I try to get out by myself at least once a week and do things with friends so that my life isn't just being a Mom and Wife. Maybe you are where you need to be right now. I know when she goes to school I have the option to go back to work ro try a new career. As for now I am enjoying every milestone which I missed with my first 2 because I worked. I hope you find what your looking for in your life. They grow up so fast. I have one graduating high school this year. enjoy your little one while you can. Take care.

Sara - posted on 12/08/2011




I've felt that way a lot and I've been out of work for almost 3 years now also. It will pass just find what makes you happy whether it be outside the home or not. I wouldn't suggest a part time job because those essentially are pointless because that paycheck just goes to daycare. I have someone who would care for my 2 yr old daughter while I went to work or school so i wouldn't need to worry about the moeny issue, but I would always offer a little something. I am enrolling in college courses this weekend and I'm also applying for a couple small jobs like a gas station store or something like that because I most of the time feel like my life is coming to a hault and I need to do something with my life before it's too late that way I'll have some sort of degree or certification before my daughter starts 4 yr old preschool. Which obviously isn't for 2 more years but still I want to have it done and over with. lol Good luck to you!

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