Hi! :-) I'm new to the group. I'm feeling discouraged lately...

Rhea - posted on 03/29/2016 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I am a 38 yo SAHM with 3 wonderful children.. I never thought I was able to have kids, but BAM, I have a set of 3 yo twin boys and a 1 yo baby girl who I love more than anything.. Their father, my husband, works FULL time.. like 17hrs per day!! He is in a 100% commission based sales job, so sometimes he loses money after a whole day.. I'm discouraged because with three very young kids, I rarely have time for myself.. My in-laws come by, and I feel almost as if they want me to wait on them... I don't want to disrespect my husband, I also miss the "me" that was able to do things for myself.. I also look at other people who come by and am very envious because they are able to sit down and watch a show or talk and socialize, while I am providing things they all need.. My own family (my parents) live far away, and I rarely see them... They are also elderly, and I'm so afraid they aren't going to be here much longer.. I hate to say it, but I feel like everyone's slave and I just wish I had one day to be me... I used to play the piano.. I am very good.. but that has been put on the back burner for so long, and my piano is currently being a place to put things... I guess I'm just discouraged and in need of knowing I'm not alone..

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Spartygirl95 - posted on 04/27/2016

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Hang in there! You have one of the most important jobs! Being a SAHM is a blessing but it can also be exhausting and discouraging. With 3yo twin boys and a 1yo baby girl, you are constantly on!

Its so important you take care of yourself and find time for YOU! Here are a few articles, http://bit.ly/1T4AS34, that will hopefully encourage you and give you strength!!

I also found joining a moms group was also helpful. Our church offered childcare during the meeting time. It gave me a much needed break from the kiddos and I was able to connect with other moms dealing with the same things. Ask for help! Can you ask your in-laws to watch the kids so you can get away for just a bit?

Hang in there! Dust off that piano and fill your home with beautiful music! Your kids will LOVE it and it will help you reconnect with YOU!

Mary - posted on 04/12/2016

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Hi Rhea! It sounds like you really have your hands full with all your little ones! It can be really hard being the sole caretaker. When I re-read your post it sounds like you are stretching yourself too thin with others and not making yourself a priority. I lost myself after having my second and I learned its about balance. What are your simply priorities in a day? Things that are required for you to do. You being able to do simple things for yourself can really be attainable in a day. (It really is as simple as pushing all that stuff off your piano, setting your kids up with some toys and sitting down and playing.) Doing things for yourself at those times seem almost impossible, but they're really not. You might not be able to get what you may have had before for yourself, but you can redefine what you need and make the best of what you can do for yourself.

Leslie - posted on 03/30/2016

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Oh Rhea…you are NOT alone….I think every SAHM feels that way a lot of the time. With 3 under the age of 4 you have a very full life right now – and especially with DH working so much I totally understand how you feel you have no time for you. I know it’s hard to do but if you can get all 3 of the kids to nap at the same time each afternoon that is when you should take some time for YOU – even if it is just ½ hour to read a book, enjoy the sunshine, chat on the phone or computer to someone, watch a tv show, anything BUT housework, laundry, kid stuff, etc, etc!!! ;-) When my kids were too old to nap I still instituted quiet time in the afternoon where they had to be in their rooms for at least ½ hour – they didn’t have to sleep but they HAD to be there and not yell for me. They could look at picture books, play with a quiet toy, rest, whatever as long as I could still have that ½ hour of ME time. If your twins don’t nap anymore that might be an idea that could help you.
I used to play the piano too….and I wish I still did – I’d encourage you to give it a try again – I’ll bet your kiddos would love hearing you play! Clear off that piano bench and keyboard and sit and play – that too will give you a boost and help you feel a little more like the person you used to be ;-)

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