How do I know when I am ready for baby #2?

Brittany - posted on 11/22/2011 ( 17 moms have responded )

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Hi everyone,
I am wondering when I will know when I am ready for baby #2? My husband and I have baby fever right now, and we REALLY want our second child. We have a couple things holding us back, though. Our daughter is turning two next month, but I still haven't lost all of my baby weight! (I have about 15 lbs to go and it seems impossible). The next concern and the most troubling is this; I lost my job about 1 year ago (due to a car accident) and we haven't been able to get out of our 2 BR apartment and into the 3 BR house we have been dreaming of. We are expecting money form the insurance company that can get us straight into a house, but that can be anywhere from 1 week to 1 year. I want another baby very badly, but my life seems to disagree right now. Please can anyone give their input/advice? I would greatly appreciate it! Thank you :)
Brittany

PS-My own mother is against us getting pregnant soon, and my mother-in-law is practically knitting a blanket for our next baby!

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Tamara - posted on 11/22/2011

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In My opinion its one of those things you just know. One thing to keep in mind there will always seem like its not the right time to have another. Money is tight, we don't have room what ever. Pray on it and discuss it.

and honestly (going to be blunt) if your putting you having another baby on how much you haven't lost from your first yet, it isn't time to have a baby you are making an excuse to not have one it maybe subconscious but that is what it sounds like.

Samantha - posted on 11/22/2011

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To be perfectly honest with you-all of these reasons why not to have a baby are nothing to really be concerned with- things like weight is a vanity reason, throw that card out the window...and having a baby in a 2 bedroom apartment isn't that big of a deal either. I mean you may feel alittle cramped but people have lived in alot smaller with a larger amount of children and actually survived lol..so unless you are concerned about being able to afford another baby then all of the other reasons look irrelevent in my eyes:) But thats my opinion -you know when you are ready, I actually enjoy the fact that my children ar close in age and hitting the age of almost three was perfect! Good luck and remember God provides:)

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Kim - posted on 11/28/2011

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There is never really a right time to have a baby. It is difficult but worth it! For me personally I am not sure if I will have another one but that is because my husband and I both feel like our family is complete with just us 3.
The best time to know to have a baby is when you both want it - and you do! Which is great - go with what feels right in your gut and ignore what others inputs are.

The thing I dislike most is when people are asking or pushing you to have more kids. It is such a private question to ask. It should be between a husband and a wife, since you both want it. When a baby is wanted by both parents that usually means it will be loved, and that is what a baby needs most, everything else will fall into place eventually! All i have to say is...good luck and let us know when you get the positive on the pregnancy test!

Brittany - posted on 11/28/2011

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Thank you, everyone, for all of your advice! I am overwhelmed with the reactions I recieved! I did not expect for most people to say go for it! Lol...I am off birth control but currently we are using protection. I have decided to wait for a month or two to try to get myself healthy...I have a back injury and a pregnancy would be easier with less weight on me! Thanks to all for making me feel comforted and like I am not alone! I hope you all can see this post...I am new to this site and am not sure how to do everything yet lol...thanks so much everyone!

Brittany - posted on 11/28/2011

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Thank you, everyone, for all of your advice! I am overwhelmed with the reactions I recieved! I did not expect for most people to say go for it! Lol...I am off birth control but currently we are using protection. I have decided to wait for a month or two to try to get myself healthy...I have a back injury and a pregnancy would be easier with less weight on me! Thanks to all for making me feel comforted and like I am not alone! I hope you all can see this post...I am new to this site and am not sure how to do everything yet lol...thanks so much everyone!

Sally - posted on 11/26/2011

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if you and your husband are ready to have child # 2 then go for it, you cant always let the bad things keep you from your goals , if your mom is against it but your mother-in-law is for it, then let them be that way, it is not up to either one to decide,it's yours & your husbands decisson to make, go for it, things happen for a reason, but when you are ready you are ready, good luck :)

Jodie - posted on 11/25/2011

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Oh, and just to mention, it was a blessing that we were both able to be home with her for the time we were after we lost our jobs. So, it was not that bad of a thing to have happened...but just wanted to mention that because we thought we waited for the right time (which it actually was) but do not wait for what you think is the right time, because circumstances can change in the blink of an eye. Hope that makes sense :)

Jodie - posted on 11/25/2011

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I agree with most of the other women on their advice to "go for it". You can always find a reason why it is not a good time. Put your trust in God and He will determine wehn you get pregnant and He will make sure all of your families needs are met. My husband and I waited until we were "married" and both had "good jobs" to have our first child. And, guess what? He lost his job when she was 3 months old and I lost mine when she was 13 months old. Waiting for what we think is the right time does not work. We need to trust God and if He has put that desire in your heart, go for it. God honors the prayers of a mother and He will provide all you need. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. The Word of God says to be fruitful and multiply and God will give you what your heart desires. Pray and if you get pregnant, know that is His will ♥ I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Be Blessed!!

Christina - posted on 11/24/2011

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you will always find a reason not to go for another baby. so i say go for it if want to. they will never be enough money, time, life, and nothing will ever be perfect timming. so as long as you want to, i say go for it. it may take a year to get pregnant, or less, but who says your going get pregnant the first time you have actually ttc? so isay go for it!

Bonnie - posted on 11/24/2011

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If you both really want another one, then go for it. Really there is no time like the present. I know of people who have waited and for whatever reason now they can not have another. Honestly a lot could change in a year once the baby would be here. The baby could stay in your room for awhile.

Tina - posted on 11/23/2011

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Well - we had a plan and we stuck with it...while DH was home with DD1 due to unemployment we nickled and dimed and payed of diligently what we could...We were lucky to conceive again on the first try and DD2 was born in July...somewhere in between the perfect house (that needs a lot of cosmetic work but it's ours) fell into our lap and DH found a job... One of my close co-workers has 9 children and he once said - if people waited until they have enough space or money they'd never have children! And honestly I couldn't agree more! I know so many people that waited until they had the money and then they struggled to conceive or were so involved with their careers that they didn't have the time to spend with their kids because they had gotten themselves into houses that wouldn't allow for one parent to stay home...Do what you think is best!

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Basically, your reasons for waiting (if you wanted to) are sound, but being in a little flat, or needing to lose some weight can be put aside if you are really ready, and can handle having another baby, houses, and weightloss will come in time, baby or not.

Crystal - posted on 11/22/2011

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My opinion: Do a lot of thinking ... don't just go with your emotions. :) On one income, can you afford all the costs and unexpected/unknown costs of another child? What if the house doesn't happen? Would you be ok staying in the apartment with another one on the way? For health reasons of course you'd want to lose the weight, but "big" girls have babies everyday. So I wouldn't necessarily have that hold you back unless you had health issues in your first pregnancy. It will most likely be harder to lose it after your second pregnancy, but thats all a personal preference. Definitely look at your financials and how the economy is today, will you be a SAHM for a while after baby is born? or will you have to include cost of daycare for 2? If you feel comfortable with your situation, do what you guys want. Don't let your family decide for you. :)

User - posted on 11/22/2011

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hi may be i can answer u! If u really want a baby just go for it! Reason! Hmmm well when i was wondering to have a second child i had not a single good reason to have it BUT i got pregnant by mistake or by luck! And my babyz luck changed every bad reason into every good reason n now am really happy to have the second one! Believe in ur baby luck! Rest will be ok:-) all bad finances will turn into good lucks!:-)

Julie - posted on 11/22/2011

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hey hun i know it's hard to wait but trust in me when i say it's the best thing i was in the same situation finaces were hell but i had that burning for a bun in the oven. now one can be perfectly finacely secure but make sure that you have everything you can in place before try again. my bf got himself a really nice job we have almost all are debts paid off. turns out i got preg accidently back in june but when i started going off on my "i want a second one" rant in augest to him we could see that the means were there.

(excuse any spelling mistakes dislexic and hating it. and yes i didn't know i was preg till end of augest.)

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