How do you discipline your kids?

Rebecca - posted on 03/25/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My two oldest girls are at the age where they are testing there limits. There is also some sibling rivalry since I just had a baby 6 months ago. What do you do when you kids act up. What I'm doing doesn't seem to be working. I need some new ideas.

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Magen - posted on 03/25/2010

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My daughter is almost 3 and tries me and her dad a lot! Nothing seemed to be working So we started time out. We sit her on the couch turn the television off and make her sit there for 5 minutes or longer depending on how bad the situation was. She hates it because she doesnt like sitting there at all. Shes actually been minding us a lot better now. Hope this helps.

[deleted account]

all children at any age need discipline and structure. Even my 8 1/2 month old gets punished. If she starts behaving badly, I try to fix anything she might have wrong because she can't talk yet, then if none of those work I put her in her crib until she calms down, then I let her out. Even though yours aren't in the crib stage anymore, you can put them somewhere for a while to calm down. Maybe send them to their room, or put them in the corner. Or sit on a certain chair till they calm down. My mom and grandparents that watched me also used to give a swat on the bottom if it got really bad. I know some people don't like to do that, but sometimes you have to show the child you mean business and it might just get their attention. I would use it as a last resort and only on the bottom, but it could wake them up and make them realize your not just talking. Whatever it is you decided to do, make sure you follow through. if you say stop or this will happen, make it happen. If they see you are all talk, then they'll keep pushing. If they know you mean business then they are much less likely to do so. If we were in public, my mom would say stop or we are going to the car. As I child I knew that was the last place I wanted to go because she followed through with what she said. I had to straighten up or else. You need to show them that mom means business and that you don't like to punish them, but you will if you have to. I know it's hard, but you have to get that into their heads at an early age. Otherwise your children will keep pushing and be unruly which you are clearly trying to avoid...good luck

Alina - posted on 03/25/2010

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It all depends on the offense. I give timeouts - one minute for every year they are, so my four year old is in timeout for four minutes. If he moves or acts out, it starts all over again until he gets through it quietly. If the kids are fighting over toys and can't share, I take the toy away for two to three days and no one can play with it. When I do give it back it usually works out b/c of how much they've missed the toy and don't want to get it taken again. I use "spank-spank" when it's needed. If we're going somewhere special just for them, but they're misbehaving, I cancel the trip and explain that there is no reward for bad behavior, and we'll have to try the outing the next day or weekend. My son is in love with Spiderman and used to throw a fit when he didn't get to watch the movies, so for a couple of weeks he couldn't watch anything Spiderman. Our daughter just turned two last month and is testing her limits, but so far everything that worked for our son is working for her, too.

Debbie - posted on 03/25/2010

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It depends on the age. With my 2 year old and the 3 year old that I watch during the day, when they start to fight and argue I make them sit on the couch with nothing to play with until I feel like they have calmed down and are ready to play nice.

When just my 2 year old gets in trouble I make her sit on the loveseat in a timeout with no toys or tv.

When my 8 year old and 12 year old are fighting with one another I make them go to their own rooms and close the door to play quietly inside without me having to listen to anything.

My 12 year old is my stepson so I don't have as much control over punishment as I do with my 8 year old and 2 year old. He lives with us fulltime but since his dad dealt with his punishment for 7+ years before I arrived, he is used to different things. I do still punish him though for not listening and such like that. He would either be grounded, have an electronic game taken away or his phone.

For my 8 year old, it all depends. She has been spanked by me if she was at a point where nothing else seemed to work but I can't say that it has happened all that much. Goodness I think as a child I was constantly being spanked and by a belt too. I have only done a hand slapping on the bottom which I'm sure hurts her pride more than it actually hurts her butt. .... She gets things taken away from her as well - but for her taking away tv or her computer or even dessert for that night after dinner seems to have the most impact for her.

I think when it comes to punishment every child is different. One thing may work for one child and wouldn't work for another child. Just finding the thing that works for that child is what takes time.

Oh and I also found that restating something to my daughter sometimes has an impact. She started lying a lot to me and I was getting fed up. Nothing seemed to work on her. So finally I told her that I didn't raise her to be a coward and how I thought she was stronger than that. She got angry that I called her a coward and I told her that if she acts like one, then what else can I assume. I told her a coward lies due to not being strong enough to handle the truth. I told her that when she lies to me then she's in effect telling me that she's a coward. She again got angry with me in which I told her to prove me wrong then and prove to me that she's not a coward. .... I have to admit that they lying got better (well, it didn't completely stop but it did lessen a great deal).

Michelle - posted on 03/25/2010

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have you tried the time out trick? if not give it a go, or the "naughty corner" even, i use that with my son, and if that dont work he goes to his room til lhe has calmed down enough to behave himself again, but if your girls share a room, that may not be a good idea, try "thinking outside the box" maybe something that wold seam drastic to you, like threaten them with grounding, toys being taken away, maybe even treaten to smack them (as a last resort iykwim), it works with my son, i only have to say that hes heading for a smacked bum n he soon stops!!!! but ive never had to yet actualy give him a smack!



maybe it will help you hunni, i hope it does xxx

[deleted account]

my kids are going through the sibling stuff too. they bicker fight - i used to make them work it out on their own... but tensions have been running kinda high lately... so what i did last night was i made them sit.. (something i havent done in forever!) one sat on the couch, the other sat in a chair- and i told them that they needed to calm down and stop fighting with one another.. they sat for 3 minutes .... i didnt say anything else, then my son said mommy we will be good now, and i let them up... they didnt fight the rest of the night! maybe it was a fluke but it worked for me!!!

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