How do you get your kids to NOT embarass you in public???

Sherry - posted on 08/31/2009 ( 27 moms have responded )

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Kids between ages: 2 to 5... I have a 3 yr. old who is usually fairly good, but when it's time to leave the playground, let's just say I want to run for cover! She says "No", and hides from me. I even give her the countdown from 15 minutes down, nothing works. I plan around her naps, bring snacks & drink... I don't get it...lol.

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Melissa - posted on 08/31/2009

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I start to walk ,a few steps away and they soon follow,and the next time they want to go to the park I remind them of what happened the last time and we dont go.

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Jennifer - posted on 09/26/2009

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I find that discipline helps when it's done at the time of the bad behavior, weather your in public or not. Little kids 2,3 sometimes even 4, do not understand (when we get home, you're going to bed, or have a timeout) Not to mention that you're now making bed a punishment. I would much rather my child behave in public, it shows how well the parents are doing at home. I have no problem telling my kids what I need to, or even going as far as making them take a timeout in the toy isle. Kids need to show respect, no matter what the age. The word no though, I'm a little iffy on. I'm not too concerned about my 1 or 2 year old saying that.... We (parents) say no all the time!! I believe kids should (depending on age of course) have the right to say it also.

Skittles - posted on 09/07/2009

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Quoting Gwendloyn:

My daughter and I were in the medford mall shopping for back to school stuff. She was 9 at the time and threw a huge temper tantrum in the clothing store cause I wouldn't buy her an inappropriate shirt I mean she litterally threw herself on the ground so I joined her and threw a fit to. she stopped right away and said Oh my gosh mom grow up you are so emberassing. I looked at her and said now you no how I feel when you do that to me.. she has never embarraced me in public again. and if she starts I just remind her of the day in the mall.


lolI've done that to my kids too that rocks that I'm not the only mom that does that. And I learned that from my aunt when my lil cousin was throwing a fit. My DD is 8 now and she acts like I dont do anything and I'm so mean for making her do everything( 1 or 2 chores)so I said fine you be the mom, I act like her and demand everything.She changest her mind with in 5 minutes or less. Its so funny

Anna - posted on 09/07/2009

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The only way to avoid embarrasments like this in public is to teach them at home.Never allow your child to say NO to you when you ask them to do something,a child needs to learn at a very young age,that when mommy or daddy asks you to do something,they need to say "yes mom" and listen cheerfully.And when mommy says NO,then that's it,we don't keep whining and begging;because it will not help.The younger you teach this to your child,by training,the less you will have to discipline this child as they get older.You and your child will be much happier if you are consistent and stick to your word,training them to be obedient.Don't go through the threatening thing,that only causes you to become angry;and we should NEVER punish our children when we are angry.Children are smart and they know how much they can get away with,Be consistent and stick to your word.Never allow your child to rule!

Ashly - posted on 09/05/2009

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did you not know its a childs job to embarass there parents in public. lol my kids love to do it when im in the supermarket, they can be very vocal about what they want as well. the only thing i find works is, telling them they will be punished ie. no tv, or treats or not getting to play on there bikes. my boys are 4 and 7 and they can be a handfull as im on im own. hope this helps

Dianne - posted on 09/04/2009

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It's important that you teach your children you mean what you say while you are at home so that when you say it in public, your child knows you mean business. To prepare young children to stop play and transition away from a fun activity, you should give a 2 minute warning, 1 minute warning and when you say its time to go, you are standing next to the child and not leaving is not an answer. Don't negotiate. When its time to leave you need to follow through. For more advice visit my website at DianneCouris.com. hope this helps. happy parenting. Dianne

Jessica - posted on 09/02/2009

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Oh also I give my children warnings that it's almost time to go. I tell them 15 minutes and we need to go. Then 10 then 5 even though they don't know time it still helps prepare them to get ready to go and finish up what they want to play with.

Jessica - posted on 09/02/2009

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Tell her she won't come back if you she can't leave like she should. And tell her that on the way to the park. And up hold it. Give the punishment a day or a week. Whatever you feel it reasonable time of punishment.

Gwendloyn - posted on 09/02/2009

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My daughter and I were in the medford mall shopping for back to school stuff. She was 9 at the time and threw a huge temper tantrum in the clothing store cause I wouldn't buy her an inappropriate shirt I mean she litterally threw herself on the ground so I joined her and threw a fit to. she stopped right away and said Oh my gosh mom grow up you are so emberassing. I looked at her and said now you no how I feel when you do that to me.. she has never embarraced me in public again. and if she starts I just remind her of the day in the mall.

Kimberly - posted on 09/02/2009

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We made it a rule that before we went anywhere are children shouldn't ask if we say we don't have it and we started this at the beginning when they started talking. Also we had it known to our children that if you embarass us we will embarass you in public. Didn't say what we would do. We left them guessing.

Angie - posted on 09/02/2009

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its normal , honestly , as a mom who had a boy whose tantrums were so bad that the doctor had to show me how to control him safely in public ! it sounds like shes just trying your authority . all i can say is keep it consistent , if you count down to leaving time then leave when you said you would . if the behaviour dosnt escalate then proceed with removing her back home . i know its difficult and embarrasing but stick with it . make the minimal fuss and eventually she'll tire of it when she gets very little reaction from you . and as a sid enote wait till shes 18 then see just how embarrasing its gonna be ! lol ! my thoughts and blessings are with you , hope you can find the patience needed to keep enjoying your outings . and smile , it does get better , honestly x x x

Sherry - posted on 09/02/2009

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Erica, I don't feel ashamed, I feel embarassed. LOL. I know I'm a decent mom & I'm doing my best, but I despize being embarssed, so I guess it's more of my own issue. It would just be so much easier if she didn't scream as we were leaving! lol. She is pretty much alone with me all day, so when she does go to the park & plays with other kids, she just don't wanna leave! I will try the snack trick, although I do keep her snack in the car. She don't care about food though when she's at the park!! LOL! Thanks so much!

Sherry - posted on 09/02/2009

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Vera, I would feel horrible not bringing her a drink while playing. I play as well with her, & I know I work up quite the thirst. The snack thing isn't really an issue, usually I do give her that in the car. We shall see... I think we may venture to the park again today & see how that goes. I'll fill ya in. Thanks for your imput!

Sherry - posted on 09/02/2009

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Thanks Renee... remember... laugh, even when u want to cry!! Keep smiling! :)

Erica - posted on 09/02/2009

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Hi Sherry,to be honest i don't let it bother me much how my kids behave in public,i'm trying to give them the best opbringing i can but if they want to ever throw tantrums in public i'm not going to feel ashamed as i see that as part of their development. Ofcourse if they are rude and worse i will defo give them good time outs and strong one to one chats but i've never really been ashamed when mi kids have thrown tantrums in public and i've also never had a problem in disiplining them in the same public irrespective of what other might say or think. Keep you head up my dear as your doing great and just stand buy your rules,if you remain consistent your child will realise there's no point in fighting. What i do wheni take my 2year old to the park is i leave his crisp.fruit and drink in the car and when i think it's time to leave i just tell him lets go and have our snack in the car,while there i give him his snacks and start driving home,he does cry a bit but keeps quiet soon after as he gets on with his snack.xx

Vera - posted on 09/01/2009

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I found that by not bringing a snack and only water to drink eventually she'll get hungry or thirsty and want to go home. I'm quite sure your child can go to the park and won't starve. If you must bring a snack, leave it in the car, tell her when she absolutely finished playing only then can she have her snack, at least that will get her to the car. Or try telling her when she does say she's hungry or thirsty that when she is ready to leave, you can stop at a little store and get her a snack and juice.

Heather - posted on 09/01/2009

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My three year old son does it too. Sometimes it can't be helped. But, sometimes walking away helps, other times you just have to get mad and discipline. I think the most important thing is you let her know, consistantly, that it is not an acceptable behavior and she will learn.

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Oh, good one! Took away tv AND forced nap and apology. So great Sherry! Good for you! Again, love that you laugh.

Sherry - posted on 08/31/2009

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Yeah... I can't wait for the "out growing" it part. I have 2 older children, 14 & 11... and sometimes I just seem to forget how hard it can be sometimes. Thanks so much!

Sherry - posted on 08/31/2009

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Yeah... I've done that a few times too. I said I was leaving & then she said wait up & took off after me. LOL. But, today... she didn't want any parts of leaving. Thanks for your input.

Sherry - posted on 08/31/2009

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Yes, i do. I told her in the car that when she got home she was going staright for a nap with no t.v. And, I told her I was disappointed & made her apologize. I know... I'm wierd..lol.

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It's definitely an age thing - my girl did the same, but thankfully has outgrown it. I did exactly what Melissa suggested and it worked very well and very quickly. I also took the time to tell her why I needed her to be ready to leave when I say it is time. She soon learned, if she acts up we don't go. Simple.

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