How do you know if being a SAHM is the right thing for you?

Stacy - posted on 05/18/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )




I'm struggling with if I am cut out to be a SAHM. It's so lonely, and boring sometimes. How do you know if the right decision for you? I know I would want to see the first steps, words, etc... but in the mean time...I just feel like I don't do anything, and it doesn't have a purpose. Any advice is great. Thx :)


[deleted account]

You kind of have to give it purpose yourself. It is so much harder than it seems--I gave up on being a sahm and went back to work THREE times before I finally figured out how to do it and not go insane :)

If you are lonely, call your friends. Even the ones that work can still usually meet up for lunch. Go to story times at local bookshops and libraries, these are great places to meet other moms, and create a social base for your little one.

Also, once you get the hang of the cleaning and housekeep you do end up with a good bit of extra time. Spend time on your hobbies or take up a new one, take an online course in something that interests you, read books (join a book club for adult conversation and discussion), or volunteer with your little one.

When J was little, we adopted a grandparent at a local nursing home, that grew into organizing parties and events for the whole community. When he was older, he helped me deliver meals with Meals-on-wheels--these people are home bound and LOVE to see little ones. It really makes their day and gives them a purpose to get up in the morning and put on a smile.

Becoming a sahm was hard for me, but since I've done it, I've really been able to find myself again and discover the things that were really important to me, that made me happy, but that I simply didn't have time for when I worked full time. Again, it seems easy to just stay home, but it is rather difficult, emotionally draining, and often stressful and lonely, unless you know what to coming and how to deal with those issues.


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Stacy - posted on 05/19/2011




Thx everyone. My child is 6 months old. I had him right at the start of a really bad winter in my area. I do work part-time (two mornings for 4 hrs. each) and my mom watches him. I also am able to work from hom. I'm not a people person, and I used to like being at home. I have a postpartum tyriod problem, and slight PPD, so I hope when that clears up, I'll be more happy. I used to always want this, now I'm not sure. I also go to a moms group once a week, and my husband gives he about 45min a night to work from home, and take an extra shower or bath. I hope it's just the PPD/thyriod issue that makes me not so happy with it.

Bridget - posted on 05/19/2011




I think raising your children is the most important job you could ever have :) and it is definently by far the hardest. but then again very rewarding. I wouldn't have it any other way i love being at home with my kids they are five four and two i love seeing all of their milestones and being here to soothe them if they are sad or not worrying about taking off from work to be with them while they are sick. Our little ones are the future i think it is on us to raise responsible happy adults

Louise - posted on 05/19/2011




How old are your children? As your child gets older and starts walking and talking things do get better and they keep you busy all day. Needing stimulating and your attention all day. If you are unhappy being at home then maybe get the best of both worlds and work part time where you can then balance your needs and babies needs together. Some mums can't hack being at home 24/7 and that is nothing to be ashamed of it is boring at times and if you are a people person it can be exceptionally lonely.

My advice is to join mums and tots groups in the area and meet other mums like yourself. This really does help take away the boredom and gives you something to look forward to.

Just remember a happy mummy has a happy baby!

LovinLifeAsMommynWife - posted on 05/18/2011




Being a SAHM isn't for everyone. My Sister says she would rather go to work than be home with her kids because she feels like she will go crazy. I personally love being home with my kids, but I'm kind of like a homebody anyway. My questions to you are: Do you go anywhere with your child/children? Have you ever thought about joining a Mommy & Me? Going for walks with your Children is another great way to get out of the house. Do you get any "Mommy" time? I need to get my nails, toes, and eyebrows done every couple weeks to pamper myself and get a little alone time. I think "Mommy" time is very important.

Hope this helps a bit! Best Wishes!

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