How long have you been a SAHM for? And does it scare you to think about returning to the work force?

Jessica - posted on 05/23/2011 ( 29 moms have responded )

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I've been a SAHM for 12 years I've had a few odd jobs here and there but nothing permanent or serious. One of our kids is into a very expensive sport and I feel like I may need to get some sort of work in order to continue to support it. I'm nervous and not sure what kind of wok I will even get into.

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Jessica - posted on 05/24/2011

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I'm sorry some of you don't have husbands that appreciate the work you do while home. I usually take a small vacation with girls friends and he gets to stay home. In 2 days of being gone he is wiped out and ready for me to come back and take care of our 4 kidos and the house LOL And he is a pretty involved father when I am here.

My husband isn't thrilled about me working. Our dream was to have me stay home till all kids were out of the house. Our youngest is 3. If I truly need to go back to work my husband's pride is surely going to be bruised. He takes A LOT of pride in providing financially for his family. Oldest is his step daughter and she figure skates. Her father used to help provide some money towards it but now I think maybe he paid 44 dollars out of the year for one week of coaching. But my husband doesn't want her to suffer because of her Bio dad's selfishness. He has never complained about the money spent but now we have 1 more child starting skating and one that I would like to see find something she enjoys.To make things comfortable financially again I really need to find a job that I can make 900+ a month and something that I won't need childcare for. My husband is starting a new position at work and his schedule is going to be changing so I will have to wait and see how that effects things too.

I haven't seen any legit work from home on line things yet. I did try partylite but I am not a sales kind of person.

Toni - posted on 05/26/2011

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I have been a SAHM for just shy of 8 years, and the thought of trying to get back into the work force scares me to death! I have a 1 yr old, so I am looking at another 4 years at least, so I have a few years to get used to the idea. ;) Good luck dear!

Kristin - posted on 05/25/2011

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i've been a stay at home mom for about only 2 years. i stopped working when i found out we were pregnant.
i have a 10month old son and two soon to be step children who are 9 and 12.
it terrifies me to think about going back to work. at times i think i want to, but the majority of the time i just want to stay with my son all day.
thinking about work terrifies me because, i know it's only been two years, but i've been out of the game for a while and i'm thinking it will be hard to break back into the workforce.
when i think about it, it just makes me sick

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Celeste - posted on 04/07/2014

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I was a SAHM for a decade. I recently went back to work (went back last year). I volunteered with my daughter's Girl Scout Troop and was on my Mothers of Multiples Club. So I felt that did help me find a job.

User - posted on 04/07/2014

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I have been a sahm since 2008. I am worried about experience and what I will do. My kids are 5 and 2. I may wait until my youngest goes to school or when she is 3, put her into preschool twice a week and during that time, I can volunteer at a private school, teaching assistant, school, where ever to update experience. I am nervous that I have lost my social skills.

[deleted account]

I feel scared about joining the work force again and my son isn't even two yet. It is a scary world now what with the way the economy is going. And now that they credit check you before they give you a job is crazy. So if you've been one of the unfortunates to have a foreclosure or a repo on your record you can forget getting a DECENT job because no one hires people with less than perfect credit these days.

Erin - posted on 05/26/2011

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I was put on disability with my second child and at that point I knew I wanted to be home forever. So technically I've been a sahm for 2 years now. I was almost done my first year of Health Information Management too lol. Oh well, plans always change. We've made a lot of sacrifices for me to stay home with the kids, including working part time on the weekends. Since I'm home with the kids well over and beyond full time hours, I still consider myself a Sahm. This upcoming sunday is my last shift and I will be a FT full time sahm :) And over the years we are making ourselves as sustainable as possible (chickens, pigs, family cow) so that even when my 2nd is in school, I won't have to return to work. I'll be busy enough keeping the homestead and raising the kids I won't have time to return to a Job.

Shannon - posted on 05/25/2011

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I have been a SAHM for 8 year now. My step kids are 11 and 9. I have been a substitute teacher at their schools for 8 years. It gives me time to go to work when we need it and stay home when the kids are sick. The schools are ok when they call and u can't go in. They understand. I make $55 a day and I have weekends off, holiday, and summers off. I have also worked as a teacher assistant and I liked it.

Pamela - posted on 05/25/2011

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I have been a SAHM for 7 years now and it does scare me to think about going back to work. Mainly because I do not want to have to work for someone else. I have been doing my photography professionally from home since I left the work force but not enough to make a lot of money at it. I also worked on getting my degree while I stayed home but with the way the economy is I don't even know if I could get a job even with my bachelors degree.. so it is all kind of scary.

Dionne - posted on 05/24/2011

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Jane I too am sorry for your lose, Hope the job hunting works out. My employment situation is similar.

Kathleen - posted on 05/24/2011

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I have been a SAHM for 16 years. When my kids started school. I went to school for a baking certificate, I wanted to do the whole culinary arts degree, but the cooking part did not meet my hours as a SAHM. I was a substitue teacher for a semester which was fun it met the hours of my kids. But now I am raising my grandson who is 3 months old. If I ever go back to work it will be at a bakery.

Jane - posted on 05/24/2011

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I have been a SAHM for 10 years now. My husband had to retire on disability in 1999 so he became a SAHD for several years. However, his eyesight got too bad for him to drive, so I was able to take early retirement to stay home and take care of him and the kids. He died this last December and so did about half our income. My daughter is in an expensive private university so I need money.

I was a museum curator before I was a SAHM, and those jobs are few and far between, so I was very worried about what work I could get. So I have started an online program that I think will make me hireable in doctor's offices and hospitals. Dealing with healthcare and providing care for my husband has been largely what I have done the past few years, so I am hoping that it is a logical step.

Yes, I am nervous. I am older than most job applicants. I really need the money, but I really like staying home. What if no one is willing to hire me? What if I get a job but hate it? What if it turns out that my son is not ready to be a latch key kid? He is 16 physically, but mentally much younger.

Too many what-ifs!

LauraBeth - posted on 05/24/2011

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@ Jessica Vaughan, very well put, I couldnt picture myself doing anything else. Even when I was in high school I was in the FHA (Future Housewife Assc.) I guess I always knew what I wanted to do! :o)

LovinLifeAsMommynWife - posted on 05/23/2011

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I've been a SAHM for nearly 4 years now. I absolutely LOVE it! I also work from home online and I love it, I have the best of both worlds. I get to work around my family's schedule. I think it's great that your Child is involved in a sport. Have you ever thought about working from home? www.wahm.com may have something for you.

Best Wishes!
www.LovingLifeasMommyandWife.com

Medic - posted on 05/23/2011

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I have been a SAHM for WAYYYY TOOO long...on like 2 years and I can't wait to go back to work full time. I hate feeling like a leach, and I hate my kids thinking that the woman "should" stay home. I love working, the interaction, the escape, the excitement of my kids when I get home from work or school. I am just not ment to stay home, and my kids deserve to be able to do extra curr sports or whatever they want and if that means I work just to pay for that then I will. Having a job makes me feel like a member of society....not just a member of a secret society. I don't know...maybe I am just over staying home....I will work full time and continue to homeschool our kids...where there is a will there is a way.

Dionne - posted on 05/23/2011

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My spouse issues are different than yours but I guess my spouse got bored with me if you want to beat around the bush about it. Glad your spouse was able to get a real view of what is done when you are a sahparent. I think after my experience it is good for all sahp to have some type of job. Whether it is for spending money, friends, a break from the monotony of same old same old stuff, or for the just in case you need to seperate from the spouse. It also gives you a sense of helping out the family, sense of pride to have earned something along with the pride of raising kids, having the kids be the pride. One more thing under your belt!!!!!
Hope you find a part time job that you like....... I am hoping I will have things in place by next summer to work a temp job over the summer months since both kids go to the same school during the summer and that town has a daycare specially for kids with disabilities and they are signed up for going there occasionally.

Danielle - posted on 05/23/2011

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I have been a SAHM for going on 8 yrs. It use to cause alot of problems in our marriage b/c my husband thought I was lazy and just didn't want to work. We actually seperated over it. I found a job and loved it. Then we decided to get back together. One day after I moved back in he lost his job due to the economy. He became a SAHD and actually found out how much work goes into it. Eventually he talked me into quiting my job and I fell back into the role again. Now there is no issue with me staying at home. My youngest starts school this upcoming yr so I plan to find at least something part time so I can have a little spending money.

Dionne - posted on 05/23/2011

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I have been a sahm for 19years. It started out great but as the years have gone by, the marriage has gone to crap. I am not tolerating the spouses bad behavior if you want to call it that. My youngest two kids are finally having less issues at school so I am trying to put together a resume and will eventually look for work. I have been a bookkeeper for 15 years for spouses self employed business which is suppose to be helpful for the resume.
The self esteem issue I have experienced is from previous generation people making comments about sahm being lazy and sitting around doing nothing all day. They really have a bad view point of sahm's. Also, with my marriage experience, my self esteem has been whittled away by my spouse. Not that this is Katherine's issue but I understand for my reasons why she brings it up.
I was suggested to try temperary jobs so I can get a feel for what I would like to do once I work more. My kids have disabilities so daycares do not want them so I am limited at this point as to the work I will be able to do. But I am hopefull the temp jobs will work for my resume.
If you are able to be selective, try temp services for a variety to see what you like.
Good luck on your search!!!!

Ericka - posted on 05/23/2011

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ive been a sahm for almost 4 yrs now :) love it and wont trade it for anything! baby #2 is to arrive this summer. I plan to go back to school when baby #2 is able to walk and talk and hopefully potty trained. have you considered a home based biz? there are so many out there that still allow you to be a sahm and have some income. if all you are looking for is to fund a sport i am sure there is something out there that can fill that need and still allow you to be a sahm. plus depending on where you live there are still job shortages.

Michelle - posted on 05/23/2011

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I've been at home just about 4 years. I'm not really worried about it. When my kids are old enough my husband and I are planning on me going back to school to get a degree in something besides the early childhood one I have. But I am planning to be home with my kids for a long time. I know I could go out and get a job if I had to with my degree, experience, and contacts. So I guess I don't worry about it too much. Since it's a long way off right now I'm looking at it as a chance to change careers when I get there (since I worked in my previous field for 10 years). This may be an opportunity for you to find something you really like.

Amber - posted on 05/23/2011

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I've been at home for a little over 5 years (since I got pregnant because I had complications).
I've been finishing my college degrees since my son was about 1 year old. I went back part time for a year, then when he was 2 I went back full time.

He's now 4, will be 5 this year, and I've finished my second college degree. I have two job interviews this week and am very excited to get back to work. I can't wait! I enjoyed being home, but I'm ready for that next step in my own career.

Amber - posted on 05/23/2011

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I've been at home for a little over 5 years (since I got pregnant because I had complications).
I've been finishing my college degrees since my son was about 1 year old. I went back part time for a year, then when he was 2 I went back full time.

He's now 4, will be 5 this year, and I've finished my second college degree. I have two job interviews this week and am very excited to get back to work. I can't wait! I enjoyed being home, but I'm ready for that next step in my own career.

[deleted account]

Forever..... Well, not quite, my girls are 9.5, so I've only been a SAHM that long. ;)

'Technically' I'm not a SAHM now since I do work part time out of the home (in childcare), but I refuse to drop the SAHM title...

LauraBeth - posted on 05/23/2011

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I have been a SAHM for 3 years I have a 2 year old and 8mo old, my Hubby does not want me returning to the work force ever and I have no desire to return, He says that it is his job to support us and he is more then able to, plus I want to be there for school functions and extra activites, however with his line of work, he could become dis. while overseas :( so I will take some classes when the children get into school to finish my degree in becoming a Hematologist. he supports and encourages this idea. but I love where I am and it is where I should be, I love raiseing our children, cooking, cleanning and all the little things that make a SAHM so much fun. Our first priority is our children and them being happy in a balanced family atmosphere, and for us that means having a mommy at home, plus why on God's green earth would I want to work two jobs if I do not have too? lol.



Katherine, I do not understand about the self esteem? I find that I am more out-going now then I ever was before. (not wanting to be rude, just wondering {love your post in Debating Mums BTW})

Sara - posted on 05/23/2011

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I havent worked since 2006, DD was born in 08. I plan on getting my DD in day care next year to get her ready for school and I get a pt job.

Katherine - posted on 05/23/2011

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I've only been one for 2.5 years but it's making me crazy. I need that respite!!!! I mean of working. I think I have a job now so I'm excited. Plus it's good for the self-esteem.

Jennifer - posted on 05/23/2011

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I've been a SAHM for 3 years. I did have one job that I just worked every other weekend, but that was only for a couple months. I am terrified of working again. Our plan is for me to return to work once our youngest (only 7 months) is in school. Before I became a SAHM, I worked in a nursing home as a nursing assistant for 7+ years. I got really burned out of that, and have lost my certification now anyway due to not doing the continuing ed. So, when I start working, it will be something completely new.

Jamie - posted on 05/23/2011

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I have been a SAHM for 6 years. Most people think I should be working right now because my only child is in school. DH and I have our own reasons for why I'm not working. A big reason is how I would even get to a job since I'm not licensed and we're a 1 vehicle family. Plus we keep talking about having another child and we don't want me to start working just to stop a few months later. Before I had DD I cared for other people's children and have never had a "real" job so I am pretty scared about working. I feel bad that DD can't be in sports or lessons of some kind but she has plenty of socialization time that doesn't cost money.

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 05/23/2011

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What are your likes? What jobs in the past have you had, that you liked/disliked? Do you like being on your feet, or sitting all day? There are also jobs that sound totally easy - a friend of mine worked at a hotel at nights so she could study while going to college. Waitressing, you would make tips but it's a lot of work. So I would just research and look around until you find inspired. Try school district jobs? If you can get in as an Aide, you're golden. They work like 4 hours a day, 5 days a week so you get out by noon and they make like 15 an hour so working so little hours ends up being the same as a full time minamum wage job! Research, ask around. There is lots out there :) and heck, try a few out. You don't know where you'll be happy as long as you don't try different jobs. Don't be afraid to not stay somewhere if you are unhappy. Just find a new job before you quit your job as its easier that way to find a job

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