how long is long enough to wait to have another child?

Ashley - posted on 04/18/2010 ( 23 moms have responded )

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hubby says 2 and a half yrs. i say hes crazy and say 5. family tells me 4....what do you think?

23 Comments

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Susan - posted on 04/27/2010

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I have 5 kids and they are a year and half apart. My youngest is 3 now which is longest I've been without falling pregnant. It's your own personal choice. If you don't feel like you can manage another one so soon then you would be doing the right thing by waiting longer before your next.

Tammy - posted on 04/26/2010

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We have 5, within 9 years. The closest 2 are 15 months apart the farthest 3 years apart. I would chose closer. It was easier to be in the baby mode and stay in it rather than be out of it (everyone gets in and out of the car by themselves, feed themselves and out of diapers) and go back. Also, as the older kids get into doing things thy need taking to it is harder to do nap times the babies need. That's not even mentioning the closer children are in age the better they usually bond. At the same time God sends babies when He choses and we all adjust and love them anyway!than be out of it (everyone gets in and out of the car by themselves, feed themselves and out of diapers) and go back. Also, as the older kids get into doing things thy need taking to it is harder to do nap times the babies need. That's not even mentioning the closer children are in age the better they usually bond. At the same time God sends babies when He choses and we all adjust and love them anyway!

Rachael - posted on 04/25/2010

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Personally for me, I want mine no more than 2 years apart. It may be harder now but hopefully they will grow up to be closer and have each other to lean on...siblings 5 years apart will probably not be friends till adulthood

Also,(and some of you will probably crucify me for this) I want all mine out of the house at relativily the same time. Not that I don't love my kids and want them around but I want time to enjoy with my husband as well. Of course part of that is that I am an older mom, so I'll be between 55 and 60 before they are all gone and by then I am hoping to retire with my husband and have lots of time and $$ to spoil grandkids! If you are younger than a bigger age gap might not be such a big deal.

[deleted account]

it's different for every family. if you're more comfortable with a bigger space, then that's probably better for you. i wanted mine close, and they ended up even closer than we planned (4 in under 5 years, no twins), but of course it's the best for us. you know what you want to handle. trust yourself.

Jaime - posted on 04/25/2010

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It all depends on the parents I think. Our first 2 kids (both boys) are 6 days shy of being 17 months apart which worked out great since they were the same sex. We still had all of Caleb's clothes and toys to pass on to Caden, so the expense was cut way down. We then decided to wait a little longer before having our 3rd baby, which was good because we had a GIRL! She is 3 years and almost a month younger than Caden (our 2nd born). The 17 month gap is challenging cause you'll have 2 on your hips at the same time for a while, plus diaper duty is like an assembly line...you change one, then the other, but it worked well for us. Best of Luck to you!

Shelley - posted on 04/24/2010

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I wanted my 1st two boys closer together but that was not how it worked out for us it took us longer than wanted to get pregnant. Its a personal choice that you & your dh have to decide on.

Rebecca - posted on 04/24/2010

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i personally got pregnant with my second child when my first child was 4 months old. i dont recommend it, lol. but really i agree, its completely a personal choice, but you will never regret it no matter how much tiime is in between them :)

Nicole - posted on 04/24/2010

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My daughter and son are 3 1/2 years apart and it is great. She helps out A LOT with her brother. When he was born she was getting me diapers wipes throwing things away trying to comfort him when he cried. Now he is almost one and she is playing with him, getting him to laugh. She is a big help when it comes to carring for him. Like everyone else has said though, it is what you are ready for. If we ever have another child though I'm going to try for the 3 year span again.

Sangeeta - posted on 04/24/2010

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My daughter is 4 yrs and now me & my hubby have started thinking of the 2nd child. We basically want to have the 2nd child by the time our daughter turns 5.

Ayndriea - posted on 04/24/2010

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I agree with Denay it is a personal choice when you feel you are ready for another bundle. I have about 3 yeras between my 2 girls and I like them being close in age so that they will be able to do some things together when they get older and my 4 year old is such a big help with her little sister.

Kristina - posted on 04/24/2010

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I think it depends on you and hubby or boyfriend. I don't think there really is a set time everyone is different. Mine are all over so. My two older boys are 18 months apart. My daughter is 4 years away from nine year old and my son is 5 yrs away from daughter but he was a surprise but surprises are good.

Julie - posted on 04/24/2010

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If you are the one doing most of the child care then I think it's more about what is best for you and what you desire out of your children's relationship to each other. My 2 are 2 yrs apart and although my daughter is only 9 mths it's been a great experience so far, and I'm very excited that they will be ready to do thing like disney etc around the same time so i won't be toting around a baby all day somewhere while my older son explores. I like that they'll be able to do it together.

Andrea - posted on 04/23/2010

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I have kids 2 years apart, and 4 years apart. I would choose closer any day of the week! THe begenning was harder, but by the time the youngest was crawling, they got closer every day. They are now best friends, and the 4 year gap doesnt have as close a realationship.

Danielle - posted on 04/23/2010

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it really just depends on when you're ready for one. kids are a full time job. my son is 3 1/2 & as much as i want another baby, i'm not ready for one. there are no guidelines for having children. you just have to make sure you're financially ready & mentally ready for another. but i would wait until the first goes to school. would make taking care of a newborn much easier through the day.

Kelly - posted on 04/22/2010

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my oldest and middle child are 3 yrs apart and my youngest was born the day after my middle child's 1st birthday. so i have a 3 yr gap and a 1 yr gap... in both aspects it was easy and hard the 3 yr gap was easy as i could explain to my daughter that she was going to have a baby brother but hard as she had been the only child for 3 yrs and had to adjust to sharing me. its hard with the boys as jay is no longer the baby and he gets really jelous. because Lochie needs alot of care (he was very sick when he was born) and still needs treatments. but i would never change anything for the world. do what u feel you can cope with.

Kristy - posted on 04/22/2010

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I tried for 2 years apart but had to wait 8 years. It all depends on the person. Whatever you feel comfortable with.

Ashley - posted on 04/18/2010

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i just know what its like to raise kids 2 yrs apart. i raised my lil bro and sister cuz my mom worked. i was the one gettin them ready for school in the morning watching and taking care of them after and putting them to bed. it was pure chaos.but i definately feel it is my choice in a way. thanks for the responses.

[deleted account]

I think that when you are ready it's the right time. There are advantages and disadvantages for any amount of time. Since moms usually do most of the kid-related work, then you should wait until you feel comfortable with having another one.

[deleted account]

It is your personal choice but one in which you need to decide together. I personally want between 2 and 3 years between my children, my little girl is 14 months so I am hoping that we well discuss try again soon, by the end of the year I am hoping but I am waiting to see what my boyfriend wants. When he says he is ready i am all for it.

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