How often do you go out?

Robin - posted on 03/11/2011 ( 14 moms have responded )

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i have a 4 month old son and my husband and i are wondering how often is normal to go out and use a babysitter? i think my husband feels bad more often than i do since i am home with our son all day everyday. but still i'm curious what other people do. last night after discussing it all day via text we decided to just bring him with us to the restaurant with our friend. how often is too much time with a babysitter?

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Amber - posted on 06/30/2011

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We try to go out once or twice a month and Christian has sleepovers with grandma and grandpa those nights. He absolutely loves sleeping over at my mom's. Even when Chad and I can't go out, he still asks to have sleepovers.

He just spent a week with his grandma and grandpa that live 5 hours away so that mommy and daddy could have a vacation alone too.



I look at it this way, it's about 26 out of 365 days that he spends away from me per year...and it's not even a whole day..more like 14 hours.

Elfrieda - posted on 03/11/2011

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I think it's much less common with such a young baby as you have. I remember the first post-baby date we went on was just over 3 months after our son was born. It was my husband's birthday, and I pumped like crazy and we went out for the whole evening. We left him at my parents' and called only once! :) I was very proud.



Now that I'm not nursing anymore, we leave him with people all the time. He's 14 months. A typical week goes: Monday I leave him with the childcare people for an hour at the gym while I work out, Fridays I work and I leave him with my husband, which doesn't count. Saturday night we have church, but we leave him with my parents so that he can go to bed on time. Sunday we have a parenting class, and they provide babysitting there. Besides that, we go out about once every two or three weeks and he stays with my parents or my inlaws, or my husband's brothers or sisters. Also sometimes I want to go shopping or run a bunch of errands, so I drop him off with a friend, who is also home with a baby, and buy what she needs and what I need from the grocery store to make it more convenient for both of us. I've never paid a sitter to come to our house. I need to get on that! I'd love to have a sitter. Mmmm.



Wow, that's a lot of writing. But that's our life. I like being away from my son in short bursts. It makes him cuter when I get back! :)

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Stifler's - posted on 06/30/2011

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I don't think it matters as long as you spend enough time with your kids and you're not always out and don't do anything with them. We used to take our kid out to dinner with us every week because we had no one to babysit him regularly (I wish we did, I would have left him there for that hour a week) but sometimes we go drinking and leave him with someone over night. I think in Logan's first year he stayed overnight with my parents like fora week on our honeymoon then about 3 other times and about twice with my MIL and once with Damo's cousin.

Heather - posted on 06/29/2011

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We have an 8 month old and we have had a sitter 5 times - and three of those times were for church. We have a family member that dumps their kid of with grandparents at least twice a week - it is a disgrace...

Heather - posted on 06/29/2011

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We have an 8 month old and we have had a sitter 5 times - and three of those times were for church. We have a family member that dumps their kid of with grandparents at least twice a week - it is a disgrace...

April - posted on 03/12/2011

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I don't go out that much. I spend most of the time with my family and do family things with them.

Ashleigh Jade - posted on 03/12/2011

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I go out by myself once a year. Thats it. I dont use a babysitter as in a non family member. My mum or partner watch the kids.

Michelle - posted on 03/11/2011

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I have a 3,2, and 3 month old. We try for once a month but it usually works out to be once every 3 months because of schedules (not for lack of effort but the calendar fills up fast). Going out with the little one is still easy when they are 4 months old (and the only child). I didn't think so when it was just my son and he was that little, but now that we've got the two girls besides just having one that sits in the carrier while we eat is nice. I think it's good for your marriage to get out at least once a month. On the brighter side the older they get the easier it gets to leave them with grandma or the sittler for a couple of hours once in a while.

Lynne - posted on 03/11/2011

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I really think too much time with a babysitter depends on the family, but I agree that once to twice a month is probably average. You and your husband need time together to keep your marriage happy too and in the long run, that's good for your baby too.

Samantha - posted on 03/11/2011

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We only use a babysitter maybe twice a month, MAYBE! But i dont feel guilty about it anymore. I have a 4 yr old and 16 month that i stay home with all day, everyday. I believe all parents deserve a night out, guilt free, every so often.

Bonnie - posted on 03/11/2011

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Even if you only do it once in awhile, chances are you are still going to feel bad about leaving your son behind. You need some sort of balance though to help out in between and give you some time away. It will help you keep your sanity.

Theresa - posted on 03/11/2011

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I think if you can, once or twice a month would be great to have for "dates". I know a person feels guilty leaving the little one with a babysitter, but it's important to have some time as a couple too. You're parents now, but you're still lovers and in order to keep the marriage strong you need to have some time with just the two of you. Only the two of you can decide how often that needs to happen to keep your love strong.

LAURA - posted on 03/11/2011

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We *try* to get a sitter at least once a month...it doesn't always pan out that way, but we both feel like "us" time is critical to a healthy marriage. But, we have 4 kids and I'm home all day, so if I didn't get some time away once in awhile I'd go crazy. I used to always feel guilty getting a sitter when my oldest was a baby, but I'm so over that now, LOL.

Bonnie - posted on 03/11/2011

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I honestly don't know how much would be too much, but I think once a month would be average.

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