I am a stay at home mom that is desperate for friends, can you help me?

Jennifer - posted on 03/14/2009 ( 29 moms have responded )

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Hi there!

I am a stay at home mom with three kids ( Jason is 5, Cody is 2 & Lilykay is 3 months old) And I do not really have any friends. My husband works 6 days a week so I hardly see him. I have not met a parent at all in my son's kindergarden class. I don't know what to do. All I do is stay at home unless I need to go shopping. The nearest park is 25 miles away, and the weather is not been that great to go there yet.

We do not have anybody that lives near us with kids my kids age. Any ideas or suggestions. Thanks!

Jennifer

Cottonwood, CA

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Lori - posted on 03/24/2009

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Lori - posted on 03/16/2009

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I am a stay at home mom I have 4 children. My husband works all the time. So I know how you are feeling. If you need to talk you can talk to me.

[deleted account]

You should go.. when I first went, I was a bit scared, but everyone there was so friendly. I think everyone of use goes through a time of feeling lonely and disconnected from others, so most of us area also all looking to make some friends and pass the loneliness. You will never know if you do not give it a good try. Just be yourself and enjoy the time there with your little ones. :)

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Florence - posted on 01/24/2013

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Hey Jennifer,
I understand just how you feel, after a while of not having that adult interaction I feel the same way as a SAHM about going back into society. "Scared"! What will people think of me? Will I fit in? I don't know anyone there, what if I end up not liking it..... and so on..

Until I got tired of doing things by myself all the time and feeling alone all the time. So, I went on MOPS. org and sign up for a group in my area. My 23 month old and I attended our first MOPS meeting yesterday 1/22/13.

I was terrified when we walked into that meeting, but, Thank GOD I got some adult time, a brake and my baby had a blast. So, we will continue going.


I don't know if the same rules apply in every state, but, the first visit is free. Then if you decide to keep attending, its $23.95 registration fee to MOPS International.
And the facility where you attend MOPS meetings will have their own fees but very reasonable price.

The group I joined charges $ 5.00 per meeting, or $75 per year (16 meetings).

I live in Renton WA but if you were close to me I will befriend you and our children could play together.

I hope this info helps and please add me as a friend.


Florence,
2 Timothy 1:7
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

Rosemary - posted on 01/17/2013

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Hi there, these posts happen to be from 2009. Does anyone know of any updates on stay home Mom groups? I am fairly new as a stay home Mom.

Kathryn - posted on 03/19/2009

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Quoting Jennifer:



I know of a play group that meets twice a week - Tuesdays & Fridays.  But, I really don't have the guts to do it.  I am afraid that no one will talk to me and/or not like me. 





You shouldnt be scared it will be well worth it once you try it out and make great friends you will be glad you did. Everyone could always use another friend

Karen - posted on 03/19/2009

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I am in Vancouver Canada, but you could email me if you want I am a mom of three as well.

karenavita@hotmail.com

Paula - posted on 03/19/2009

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Try MOPS.  Here's their site so you can do a search for one in your area.  It's a wonderful group and it will get you connected with other moms.  http://www.mops.org/    Once your children are a bit older and in pre-k you'll be meeting more mothers and once they're involved with sports, school activities, scouts, etc. you'll make more friends.  Good luck to you.  I live away from my family and have found MOPS to be a wonderful support system.

User - posted on 03/18/2009

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Jennifer,
Hello. I too am a SAHM. If you ever need to talk I am usually on here. Please feel free to add me on your friends list. Shoot me a message sometime. Take care and have a good one.
Veronica Briseno-Beebe =)

[deleted account]

Quoting Missy:



There is also www.mommiesnetwork.com there might be a group close to you and if not you can start one.  I moved 1200 miles away from family and friends, this site saved me. It is online and face to face events, whichever you are comfortable with.





I second this suggestion but the web address is http://www.themommiesnetwork.org. I am a member of FredericksburgMommies.com and ABSOLUTELY love it! I am a SAHM and I had NO mommy friends when I had my daughter and now because of this network I have friends, adult conversation and an event to go to (if I want) at least once a week. The best part of it is it's FREE!

Missy - posted on 03/16/2009

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There is also www.mommiesnetwork.com there might be a group close to you and if not you can start one.  I moved 1200 miles away from family and friends, this site saved me. It is online and face to face events, whichever you are comfortable with.

Kim - posted on 03/15/2009

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I just moved to a new town (actually a new state 700 miles away from my friends and family). I have joined a Stroller Fit class, which gets me out of the house three mornings a week and I can exercise with the baby. You should go to their website and see if there are classes near you. Also, check out local YMCA's, etc, meet up groups (meetup.com) and see if there are any playgroups in your area. I hope this helps some. Good luck. I know the feeling.

Caroline - posted on 03/15/2009

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I agree with Erin..I found a playgroup on Meetup.com. The group I joined is huge, and they have new members all the time (so there are no cliques). I tend to be a bit shy, so I'm always a bit nervous each time (but everyone is SO nice, and it is COMPLETELY worth it to get out of the house!!). I just try not to think about it until I get there, and then I realize that I had nothing to worry about! Step out of your comfort zone, you won't regret it!



From one shy mom to another! :)

Heidi - posted on 03/15/2009

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Hello! My name is Heidi and I am a SAHM of 3 kids. My hubby also works 6 days a week and I am home all day. We have been here a year and still dont know anyone. So if you ever need someone to talk to I am here.
El Paso TX

Erin - posted on 03/15/2009

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Also try looking into Meetup.com and plug in your zip code and playgroups or stay at home moms groups. Some groups ask for a fee after joining for a month but it might give you another option, especially if there is not a MOPS group in your area.

It is okay to be nervous about going to the playgroup for the first time...when you go you will probably find that there are others who feel/felt the same way! You won't know until you try though...if you don't like it you do not have to go back, but give yourself and the other women a chance and you might really enjoy yourself!

TinaMarie - posted on 03/15/2009

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Do what my girlfriend and I did, we started our own online group!  We were members of other groups and all they did was correspond online.  No one ever did anything!  It is frustrating!  You join these groups to meet people and no one does anything.  Our new group is slow getting started but we post playdates at rotating houses so that everyone gets to be involed and we have field trips to several things in the area so that if someone may be hesitant to come out to a playdate at a house an activity at a venue may get them involved.  Give it a shot!!!!

Taren - posted on 03/15/2009

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my mops isn't free, but they always have scholarships available. I had to use a scholarship. Plus they are ALWAYS welcoming. I havn't been to one yet (and I've been to 4 different ones because of moving) that they weren't friendly and welcoming.

Sarah - posted on 03/14/2009

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Everyone has already said it, but I will too. Go to a playgroup. I feel lonely sometimes too. Like, today, I was on a walk with my kids and I saw some people get out of a car and walk up to a house. I wanted to talk to the woman that was there so bad, but then didn't because I didn't even know her (and that would be kind of weird for me to just start talking to her when she's trying to get in her house). But in a setting like a play group, everyone is there to meet someone or to get adult conversation, so don't feel weird. Everyone is there for the same reason. Good luck, and let us know how it goes.

Lori - posted on 03/14/2009

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The first time at a new playgroup - or any new group is scary. I put off joining one for several months but I have already made 2 friends. You might not become best friends but at least you'll have other people to hang out with.

Kim - posted on 03/14/2009

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Hi there, I am also a stay at home mom and had a hard time making friends. The thing that has really helped me is our church. There are lots of children that are the same age group as my kids. So I got to know the families by helping in the kids rooms once a month or so. It has been a great way to get to know other moms with the same values and beliefs as myself. Hope this helps. Don't be afraid of the the playgroups either it can be intimidating at first but well worth your sanity to just get out of the house. Who knows maybe someone else is there and worried about the same thing. Check with your school for government funded programs for kids aged 0-5. Our state has one called SKIP and my kids and I love it!!!

Elizabeth - posted on 03/14/2009

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You really should try MOPs. It is free and it will give you a nice break and a time to be with adults.

Jennifer - posted on 03/14/2009

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Do you have to pay for MOPS??   I do know of a play group through WIC ( Women infants & Children)  I just don't have the guts to go. Alot of moms who stay home have their own groups of friends and they don't want to allow anybody else in. So I am afraid that no one will talk to me and/or not like me! 

Taren - posted on 03/14/2009

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Jennifer, I'm a stay at home mom too, and it is difficult to make and find friends in this stage of life. I found MOPS (mothers of preschoolers) about 2 years ago and it saved my life. You can go on to mops.org to find a local group near you. It's totally worth it! I hope that this helps you

Jennifer - posted on 03/14/2009

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I know of a play group that meets twice a week - Tuesdays & Fridays.  But, I really don't have the guts to do it.  I am afraid that no one will talk to me and/or not like me. 

[deleted account]

When my kids were little we lived in nowhere land... We had just moved there so I did not know anyone.. the one thing that I did was go to the resource center, where I found a few playgroups in the area. I do if you have any kind of child/family resource center in your area but that is worth a try (don't know if the states have them, I am in Canada). I made some wonderful friends, not life friends but friends that kept my days from being so long and the kids had little friends to play with.

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