I'm hello? 911?

Jessica - posted on 01/12/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I have a 7 month old and my fiancé leaves for basic in March. He seems to think that because he can get way by doing little to nothing since he's leaving soon. He used to be hard hard working. Now he stays up all hours of the night playing video games like 3 am. Yes granted he will deal with the baby while he is awake. But then he sleeps till noon because I force him to get up since we sleep in a living room in his moms house down stairs. He doesn't work. I work 24/7 being a stay at home mom on-top of all my online college I'm doing. I really just don't know what to do. His stupid friend is here that he knows I can't stand nd is staying the night I just found out because I woke up at 5 am to them playing video gems they finally stopped about 10 till 6.  So fed up I told him. Didn't kiss him goodnight. I'm livid and so tired of it. Please advise will help. And remember that we both are 18. I graduated 4 days before I had my daughter. He just got his GED in september and joined the army. Oh and I Yget a night off about maybe once a month maybe two. He has done it like twice to go play video games in the morning back when he wasn't staying up all night.

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Sarah - posted on 01/12/2012

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You could point out that it would be good to get in some bonding time with that beautiful baby since he's going to miss so much (not trying to depress you, just reality) when he ships out.

It's possible that with you guys in such close quarters for now he just doesn't realize this. Even if he flat out blows you off when you say this, it may very well ring in his ears when he is in training & missing the 2 of you.

It is also possible that he considers this time his last chance to have fun for awhile, so don't be afraid to point out it's his last chance for more than that. Would his mom be able to watch the baby for a while? Even if it was just upstairs while you 2 had a grown-up movie night downstairs. You could remind him of a few things he'll miss about you too. (wink, wink)

Is there a base in your current town? It might also help you to get in touch with some other Army wives. Military wives tend to be very supportive of each other & if you make friends now you'll have a network to call / fall on when he's gone.

Stay strong & stick it out! The Army will turn your boy into a man.

Kay - posted on 01/12/2012

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This is hard but no need to say anything for now. When you get upset, just put an image of his soon to be drill sergeant in your mind ! I guarantee he won't be playing video games all night and he will be up with his bed made at the crack of dawn! The military does teach discipline!

Vanessa - posted on 01/12/2012

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My husband used to play video games all the time, I hated it sooooo much. The only thing you can really do it set him down and talk to him. He might not know how much it bothers you, and it will only get worse if you dont talk to him. Yall are married and have a baby and he needs to realize that he is a husband and a father, and yall come first!!!!!! My husband is in the Army, so I understand the military life if you ever want to talk

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