In Laws & their opinions

Davine - posted on 04/03/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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So I have got to have the most condescending in laws ever! I am a young mother of 2 yound children and my 10yr old stepdaughter. I started dating my fiance at 18 and he is ten years older than me. Naturally I was a little lazy, just got out of high school and was still in a partying phase! But shortly there after I found out I was pregnant with my daughter...so I smartened up! It was still very hard for me to figure out how to be a stay at home mom/wife, and I have come a long way in 5yrs. I had a few part time jobs here and there. But I always wanted to make sure I was able to stay at home with my kids. My fiance works his butt off, but a lot of times we struggle. Now to the inlaws...anytime we have ever needed help or even just randomly they will all point their fingers at me and say well you should be working! As we all know it is not very easy to find a job, especially one that will work around being at home with your kids! I am constantly being called LAZY and useless! they all think that I should put the kids in daycare and work full time! My fiance ends up saying similar things. Does anyone else have these judgements as well?

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Jayme - posted on 04/03/2010

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Actually I'm the complete opposite. I'm a 23 yr old stay at home mom. Had my daughter at 19 and my son at 20. Worked while I was pregnant with both of them and after I gave birth. Then my in-laws said I should be a stay at home mom to make sure my kids are well tooken care of. I had them in daycare for 3 months and my son ended up getting burned and court system took both of my kids away for 18months. Short story I no longer trust daycares unless I know someone working there or Know how the facilities work. Some people you just can't trust around your kids even if they are certified to be around kids. Now I have been staying home with my kids going on one full year. And it seems like I can't do anything right. Or the way that my inlaws what it done. They complain about how I do my daughters hair how we cut my sons hair or why dont we take them to the er when they have colds instead of the drs office. Are you going to do this or that for them. When are you going to do this or that. Sometimes I just want to take my kids and run away from everyone and just let me and my husband raise our kids without people interrupting. Not only do my husbands parents say things his sister complains about what we do, how we feed them what we feed them how we dress them and she doesnt have kids. Some people need to realize we are grown adults and we can make grown decisions on our own we dont need someone to look over our shoulders at every move we make. Maybe you can look into temp services that will let you work around your kids. When I was working I worked day shift and my husband worked the night shift. Most places are willing to work with you especially if they need the help. But it is hard to find a job now days I have been looking for a year and still havent found anything. Go to your dhs office and they might help with assistance like food stamps insurance for the kids. But that always depends on your income too.

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Iris - posted on 04/04/2010

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My hubby use to say the same thing to me when my son was younger.And now he doesn't say nothing because I have gone out there to work and he realized how hard it was for me to work all day, then come home and cook dinner and clean the house. Then I took in babysitting, I make not alot of money but it does help for what I make. Then I can stay at home and do the house chores and look after my family..

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