mommy looks after baby & daddy comes home when baby sleeps already

Loret - posted on 12/29/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )




my hubby works from 8-5 normal hours & i work from home so i take care of baby & work etc. on off days my hubby goes fishing or plays golf. after work he sometimes go for a drink with buddies & by that time baby is already bathed & sleeping.

i feel he doesnt spend much time with our baby but he says he will once our son grows up because he will then play ball with him. now he just needs his mother?

i also get tired & just need a break. am i unfair?


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Michelle - posted on 12/30/2009




No he needs to let you have a day off, you essentually have two jobs, so he needs to help you. If he doesnt spend time with your baby now, he wont be able to for the special bond that you and the baby has already. Sure the baby doesnt do much now, but he still needs to hold up his end. Its both of your baby, not just yours.

My boyfriend has a blast with our 6 month old and would think twice about not spending time with him. He and I give each other a break. And thats the way it should be!

Just tell him you need time off too, especially if its you who had the baby, who feeds the baby and who soley care for the baby!

Christy - posted on 12/30/2009




your husband should definitely be helping you out. if he gets home from work by 5:30 or so there is plenty of time for him to play or cuddle with the baby AND go out for a drink with his buddies if he thinks he needs to. his days off need to be family days, not golf days. maybe 1 day every other week could be for golfing or fishing but there is no reason that he should be going off every day he has off.

make him understand that your job is 24/7 and sometimes you could use a break. not only that, even though babies are wonderful, i'm sure you crave some adult interaction while caring for your child. ask him why he thinks it fair that you have to do all the not fun stuff of parenting while he gets to have the first few years off until your son's old enough to play ball. a baby needs BOTH parents from a young age, if for no other reason than for mommy to keep from burning out.

Darla - posted on 12/30/2009




Your feelings are totally justified! IF he doesn't take the time to bond with your child while he is younger, then he is not going to want to play ball with a "stranger" when he gets older. Sounds to me like your husband is just looking for an excuse to check out of the hard part of raising a child. You deserve a break, a day out on the town with your friend or whatever sounds good to you. I think you should demand that this happen.

Joannie - posted on 12/29/2009




No...He needs to give you a break here and there in my opinion. My husband work the grave yard shift and i dont work at son is 18 mths old and keeps me busy but still Billy comes home and plays with Garrett for an hour or two..I get to sleep in and everyone is happy. You need to sit down with your husband these are bonding times right now and its important you both have quality time with your little one..He will regret it later..god luck hun :)

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