My 3 almost 4 yr old daughter will not poop in the potty. She crys and will not do it. Help please

KRISTI - posted on 12/20/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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She pee pees in the potty but has only pooped twice in the potty . When I encourage her to do and put her on the potty she screams and crys like the world has ended. She says she scared. She is a very smart little girl so I really need some good ideas on this. I mean she will be 4 in Feb and its getting ridiculous. I promised a surprise when she pooped in the potty and when she did a couple of months ago she got a surprise princess dress up set, but she just has a problem doing it. She has no problem pooping in her panties. I dont understand, she can use big potty or her little one. We tried the potty doll, and tons of other things. I know they say not to rush them they will do it when they are ready but she will be in Pre-k next year and I need any help/advice possible. Thanks so much.

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Brandi - posted on 12/20/2009

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Some children are like this (my daughter was for a while) because they have a psychological attachment to their poo. Some kids feel that a part of themselves is leaving them. they don't understand that it's OK. What I did was to first calm down a little. If she is upset about pooping on the potty, don't force her to sit there (i know it's hard, I used to try to "make" my daughter do it to). it won't work. Anyway, praise her when she sits on the potty to try. If she gets upset let her off. When she poops in her pants. have HER take her dirty undies to the potty and dump the poo in the potty. Then let her "say goodbye" either let her make up a good bye song or just have her say bye bye poopie (or whatever) then let HER decide when to flush it. She will soon see that it's OK for the poo to go byes in the potty. She will also see that it doesn't simply disappear. It stays there until SHE decides it can go away. I know it sounds really ridiculous, but I really think this might help. I started to do it with my daughter and she really only did it a couple of time before she figured out what happens. I also would make her clean up whatever mess was made when she went in her pants and calmly explain that if she poos into the potty, there is no mess. (help her of course, but make sure she is involved in the consequences of pooping in your pants) and let her watch you go and let her flush it byes. It's all such a gross part of motherhood, but what we don't do for our kids lol

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KRISTI - posted on 12/20/2009

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Quoting Brandi:

Some children are like this (my daughter was for a while) because they have a psychological attachment to their poo. Some kids feel that a part of themselves is leaving them. they don't understand that it's OK. What I did was to first calm down a little. If she is upset about pooping on the potty, don't force her to sit there (i know it's hard, I used to try to "make" my daughter do it to). it won't work. Anyway, praise her when she sits on the potty to try. If she gets upset let her off. When she poops in her pants. have HER take her dirty undies to the potty and dump the poo in the potty. Then let her "say goodbye" either let her make up a good bye song or just have her say bye bye poopie (or whatever) then let HER decide when to flush it. She will soon see that it's OK for the poo to go byes in the potty. She will also see that it doesn't simply disappear. It stays there until SHE decides it can go away. I know it sounds really ridiculous, but I really think this might help. I started to do it with my daughter and she really only did it a couple of time before she figured out what happens. I also would make her clean up whatever mess was made when she went in her pants and calmly explain that if she poos into the potty, there is no mess. (help her of course, but make sure she is involved in the consequences of pooping in your pants) and let her watch you go and let her flush it byes. It's all such a gross part of motherhood, but what we don't do for our kids lol


Thanks so much that actually make some sense because it does kinda seem like she is attached to it. It for sure is a messy job to clean up poopy panties but I dumo them upside down in the pottty  so the poop falls and then I wash them out. I think having her help with her mess is a great idea, and thanks for the advice I appreciate it. I do go poo all the time and explain to her see it dont hurt mommy does it and I even let her flush it. Thanks again u have given me some relaly helpful advice


 

Hailey - posted on 12/20/2009

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my girls were exactly the same it took alot of patience but we finally got there let her watch when you go to do num 2s i know it sounds yuck but at least then she knows theres nothing scary about it , and when or if she still poops in a nappy tip the poo in the toilet and let her know shes a big girl now and should poo in the toilet

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