My almost 5 y/o still has regular accidents.

[deleted account] ( 5 moms have responded )

My daughter turns 5 in a few weeks and she still has 1 to 2 accidents a day. On a rare good day she is dry all day but on a bad one she can go through 4 changes of clothes. I've taken her to the doctor to check for infections as she sometimes has a strong fishy smell after a change. They say she's fine, it's normal and don't worry as all kids learn at different ages but I think there must be something I can do to help her. Her 2 1/2 y/o sister has overtaken her with her toilet training success. Also she won't tell anyone when she's wet, she'll just keep on playing until someone else notices. Please help, my patients with her is rapidly dwindling and that only makes things worse.

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Rachel - posted on 07/04/2011

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Wow! When I read this it was as if I was reading about my life 1 year ago. My oldest daughter is now 6 (as of June) and still wets during the daytime. It is sporadic now, and after using a night time alarm she stays dry at night. We tried everything. Positive reinforcement, books, ignoring and even time outs and loss of privileges. Nothing worked. She came to me about 3 months ago embarrassed that the accidents sometimes happen at school and that sometimes she really can't "feel" the urge to go, it just happens. I took her to the Dr. again, determined that this is something physiological, not behavioral. The Dr. did an Xray and found massive constipation. This can press on the bladder and cause accidents. Think of it like the pressure of the baby on your bladder when you were pregnant. She put my daughter on a 2 week course of Miralax, and told her to try to empty her bladder every 2 hrs and sing her ABC's 2 times before getting up. Huge difference right away. Now, she is undergoing allergy testing to see if that is the cause of the constipation and another bladder irritant (allergies to food can cause an allergic bladder with the odor you discussed...I have this as I am allergic to wheat...just found out). I do hold my daughter accountable though if she keeps playing when wet. I tell her that she does need to own the issue and go change right away b/c sitting in wet pants will only make things worse and is not appropriate at her age. I simply give a time out like everything else if she doesn't take initiative and move on. Hopefully after all these years we can cure this issue. And hopefully this helps you, a year sooner than it helped us. :) Best of luck!!! Also, if you do lose your patience just apologize and explain that you too are frustrated with the issue, not her. That helps us.

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Katherine - posted on 07/04/2011

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My daughter is 5.5 and used to do the same thing right before she turned 5. I mean the exact same thing. She wouldn't tell me, she said she couldn't feel it, I took her to the doctors and everything was fine.
I agree with Jennifer and I found this the be true: When they are playing, they are too busy to go.

She will stop I promise.

Heather - posted on 07/03/2011

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i would time it and take her every hour and a half. my 7yr old boy with downs is going through this as well. sometimes he's so into playing he forgets and pees himself. do reminders every hour as well, good luck

[deleted account]

It's a bit of both really. Sometimes she's just too busy and doesn't make it but she never rushes to get there, she just wets and keeps playing. Other times, as I'm taking her, I'll ask if she's dry and she'll say yes. When I find that she is in fact wet, I'll ask if she knew she was wet and she'll say no. It's frustrating because she is just so inconsistant.

Jennifer - posted on 07/01/2011

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Is it just because she is too busy playing, and doesn't want to take the time to go, or is it that she doesn't get the urge to go. If it is because she doesn't want to stop playing, just simple reminders by you is usually enough. If you know it has been a while and she still tells you no, you can do what I used to do with my daughter. If we were out somewhere, I would just simply tell her mommy has to go potty (even if I really didn't) and of course she would have to come along. Once we got to the potty, I would just tell her well, we're here you may as well try so we don't have to come back in a little bit. It worked every time. For some reason this is a very common thing for girls. I still catch my 6 year old wiggling around and then running trying to hold her legs together to the bathroom, because she waited til it was almost too late. If it isn't from that, then I would suggest a different doctor.

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