my duaghter is becoming more and more defiant help!!!

Katie - posted on 02/07/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )




is anyone else having a hard time with there child not taking you seriously and being extremely defiant? My daughter is almost two and a half and every time i ask or tell her not to do something she laughs at me and does it anyway. I dont really want to hit her and if i do she just laughs at me more. i am starting to get really frustrated and with all this stress i am getting headaches like every day. what would you guys do????


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Katie - posted on 02/07/2010




its not a hit really the dr told me to use one finger and tap on the top of her hand. I was abused and so was my brothers so i dont believe in it.
As far as the time out thing we have been doing that since she was 2 and it doesnt phase her.! lol

Jennifer - posted on 02/07/2010




What works for one child will not work for another. Hit, spank, timeout there are a lot of things to try. Trial and error, you have to find what will work for you both. I don't know about you, but I have four kids and none of them have ever sat for a time out, unless put in their crib. I believe there is no such thing as terrible twos, my youngest has been a very testy baby since I can remember! He's 20 months (2 in June). Every child is different, I hope you can find something that will work for you and your child. It's the most frustrating time when they are young and so defiant, you want to knock them out!! Personally, I am more worried about a 3 or 4 year old acting up than a 2 1/2 year old, they really don't care what you think.
Best of Luck!

Ala Ala - posted on 02/07/2010




i believe your daughter is going through the "terrible twos" stage. my son is in now. try looking at this website and search for terrible twos.

i realized that my son was not really being defiant, they just don't know how to communicate as well as we do or as their older siblings. they get frustrated and start having tantrums.

what i did was take time to try to understand what he was saying. try the guessing game or made him show me what he wanted. and told him when i couldn't understand him. i tried to stay calm and did not show my own frustrations. make her feel that you really want to help.

when the request is just small things better to give in reserve the "time outs" for the bigger issues. as long as it does not cause any injury to them or others just let her be for the moment.

my son is now 2 and half... knowing this and reading about it in the internet really helped me. our kids are not really bad kids... they are just misunderstood.

Sarah - posted on 02/07/2010




When she disobeys do a time out, but you need to do them in the right way. Give her 1 warning, if she continues to disobey firmly let her know that that is unacceptable and that she needs to sit in the time out spot (spot should be where you can see her, but she can't play or watch TV). She MUST sit there for 2 mins. If she gets up before then you put her back, but DON'T INTERACT. TIME ALSO DOES NOT START UNTIL SHE STAYS FOR THE WHOLE 2 MINS. When the 2 mins. is over you let her know why you put her there and then she must tell you sorry. You MUST be CONSISTANT and FOLLOW THROUGH. If you are not consistant and give threats, but don't follow through no kind of discipline is going to work.

LauraBeth - posted on 02/07/2010




If I where you I wouldnt say hit on this website some moms on here are really touchy about that word(even though most of us understand) and might turn you in or really come unglued on you for child abuse LOL but seriously, I had a cousin just like that and the only thing my aunt could do was start a chart for when he did what you said he would get a star and at the end of the week he got a prize and at the end of the month they when to chuck e chesse. when he acted badly they removed a star and went to the time out chair ( she usually had to sit there with him though) but after a couple of weeks things really smoothed out for her.

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